“You gave up that privilege the night you dismissed me from your home.” She swallowed back the tears as she stepped back from him.

“Thank you for the dance, Your Grace.” She dipped her head and walked back towards Amos.

Amos watched as Beatrice walked away from him and directly to Duncary. His body leaned, ready to stalk over to them and demand they not go any further with this charade.

He held his hands behind his back, hoping to stop himself from doing anything stupid to the man. It took all of his strength not to lay hands the blasted Duncary when he asked for a dance with Beatrice.

Seeing them together was too much for him to handle. He thought enough time had passed that he would be able to be around her without consequence.

He was wrong. If anything, it only made it worse.

As he stood there, watching her whisper something in Duncary’s ear Graham’s body tightened with tension.

She left Duncary’s side and went out on the veranda.

His eyes drifted back to Duncary who was looking at him with a smirk on his face before turning to talk to a friend.

Graham’s eyes flew back to the veranda’s door.

She’s out there by herself.

Without another thought Graham found himself walking through the veranda door. He stopped short when he found the veranda empty.

He walked to the outer wall and peered out over the sprawled out gardens.

There!

Beatrice was walking on a path that led to a fountain. Graham trailed her and waited until she sat on the bench and took a deep breath.

“I thought you knew better than to wonder by yourself at night.” He said as he stepped up to the bench she was sitting on.

Beatrice rolled her eyes as she groaned. “For someone who wants nothing to do with me, you are certainly going out of your way to seek me out.” She grumbled.

Feisty. He liked her this way.

“The ending to our arrangement did not go as either of us planned.” He started.

Beatrice looked up with a pointed look.

“But that does not mean that I do not care for you.” He sat down next to her on the bench.

She immediately jumped up. “No. I cannot do this. Not now. Not with you.”

Graham was surprised by her outburst. “I can’t sit with you?”

She pulled her arms over her chest, closing herself to Graham. He felt a sharp pain in his chest at her reaction. She looked so fragile standing in the moonlight.

I did this to her. See? You can’t stop hurting people.

Graham rolled his lips. He was not used to having conflicting feelings. He rested his elbows on his knees and hung his head. This was why he had his own list of do’s and don’t’s with one of them being no repeated dalliances with the same woman.

Attachment, from either side, was not something he handled well. Except, it was usually the woman who became attached. This time, he had a sneaking suspicion that he was just as guilty.

That did not sit well with him.

“I’m sorry, Beatrice. I wish things were different.” He offered.

Beatrice cut his useless words off with a laugh.

“Just stop.” She pleaded. “Enough with this game of acting like you are doing me a favor. You said your peace weeks ago, I have moved on. Isn’t that what you wanted?”

Graham rubbed his hands on his face. “Yes. No.” He sat up. “I don’t know any more.”

Beatrice dropped her hands to her side. Utter defeat and exhaustion colored her expression.

“Are you saying you didn’t want me to move on?” Her eyebrows rose in question. “What? Am I supposed to be like a little puppy and pine for you with no reciprocation?”

Graham looked to her. “You pined for me?”

He couldn’t help it. Knowing that he wasn’t the only one in turmoil these past weeks soothed a little part of his soul.

Beatrice shook her head in disbelief. “Unbelievable. That’s what you’re focusing on? Not on how you acted? There is a give-and-take amongst friends, amongst those we care about. There was no ‘give’ with you, only ‘take’ and I can’t give any more.”

She brought her hands up to her face to wipe the tears that began to flow freely. Seeing her cry changed something within Graham. He jumped up from the bench and went to her, cradling her head in his hands.

“This is why we can’t be together. Look at what I do to you.” He whispered as he wiped a tear away with his knuckle.

Beatrice looked up to him as she pushed him away. “Stop. You’re a man. If you are sorry about it, fix it. You can stop it if you want to.” Her voice was harsh and her words direct.

Graham ran his hands through his hair. “Do you think I like knowing that I hurt you?”

Beatrice shook her head defiantly. “I think you do!”

Graham took a step away, turned back and opened his mouth, only to close it again. This woman had gotten under his skin like no one else. And she wasn’t afraid to tell put him in his place, which something he was not used to.

He usually found it refreshing when she exercised her strength. Tonight he found it frustrating.

“As if it’s a switch?” He chided. “It’s because I care about you that I hurt you, don’t you see that?”

Beatrice stood dumbfounded. “That was the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard.”

Graham ran his hands through his hair again and growled. “Must you be so insufferable?” He dropped his head back and bellowed into the night sky.

He turned to Beatrice when silence answered him instead of her. She stood, looking at him with a knowing look on her face. He knew her well enough to know that she felt powerful in that moment. And she was right to feel that way.

Graham was not one to show emotion and he just exposed himself to her. He rarely lost his cool and when he did it never was because of a woman.

He stood with his hands on his hips, looking back at her.

The two were in a standoff, both waiting for the other to makes a move.

She took in a deep breath and released it. “What do you want from me, Your Grace?” Her voice had become tired and strained. “You tell me to go, I go.” She looked resolved, exhausted, but steadfast. She looked more in control of her emotions than he felt right now.

What was happening to him? Nothing reached him emotionally, he carefully created his persona to be impenetrable for this exact reason.

He said nothing. There was nothing he could say. His actions confused him just as much as they confused her.

She scoffed as she wiped the last tear from her face. With a shake of her head she picked up her skirts. She got just past him when Graham’s arm reacted without thinking.

He reached out, grabbed her and pulled her in. His mouth crashed hers. Much to his surprise she didn’t fight back. Her hands immediately found purchase in his hair. He welcomed her nails as she scraped against his scalp sending jolts of electricity down his spine.

Heaven help him, but he missed this. He missed her. His tongue clashed with hers causing Beatrice to moan against him. His hold tightened against her.

Damn if she didn’t feel perfect against him.

His hands went back to her face to tilt her head to deepen the kiss. His fingers brushed against her cheeks where he felt the dampness from her fallen tears.

Reality came crashing down on him. He hurt her.

He would always hurt her. She has too much to offer this world to let his issues bring her down.

She deserved someone who would champion her, someone who could meet her strengths and use them to push her even further.

He would only drag her down with his own insecurities.

He pulled away suddenly, causing Beatrice to stumble forward.

“I was wrong.” His words felt lie gravel on his tongue.

The hope in her eyes numbed his senses.

“You were?” Her question squeaked, much like a mouse. He smiled slightly at the connection.

“You should marry Duncary. He will be an excellent match for you.”

Beatrice shook her head in confusion. “N-n-no.” Her hands tightened on his lapels.

He removed them as gently as he could. “As if we needed any more proof that I am not the man for you this night should have quelled that need.”

He watched as the realization settled within her. He dropped his gaze, he couldn’t bear to see her hurt any more.

Beatrice looked back to the veranda then back to him. She pointed to the ball. “If I go back in there, that’s it. This,” her finger wagged between them, “whatever this is between us is over.”

Graham nodded as he cleared his throat. “As it should be.” He nodded towards the ballroom. “Go on. I’m sure Duncary is wondering where you are.”

Beatrice took another breath and turned. Her steps started slow but quickened in time. He watched with his heart in his throat as she began to run back towards the ballroom.

He was right. He did this for her. She’ll see that in time, she had to. Their situation got away from both of them. Hell, Frederic was right. But, now it’s done. She’ll marry Duncary, and he’ll go on with his life.

So why was he still staring at the door to the ball room wanting to go back in and carry her out over his shoulder?