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“ A h, Beatrice, I’ve been looking for you.”

Beatrice turned at the sound of her mother’s voice coming through the garden arch. It had been deemed that Beatrice was spending too much time inside, sulking, so her mother prescribed her a morning outside in the garden.

“I’m where you left me.” Beatrice’s voice was emotionless. She was too tired to give her mother the usual sass that was needed in surviving a conversation with her.

“I see my treatment did nothing to cures what ails you.” Charlotte lifted an eyebrow at her daughter.

Beatrice sighed and transfixed her gaze on the ground before her. She didn’t blink, not a single thought entered her mind, she was just lost in the haze of melancholy.

“Well, if this beautiful morning didn’t help, perhaps the news I have will.”

Beatrice felt her mother sit next to her, she shifted her body to face Beatrice.

“From your mood these past few days I take the letter written to your, um… friend, was not received well.”

And there it was. The only thing that was able to break through her defensive emotional wall.

Heartbreak.

Beatrice squeezed her eyes shut as she tilted her head away from her mother. She was tired of the tears that accompanied her thoughts whenever she thought of that night, of him.

She tried giving into the feelings and completely losing herself in sobs. She tried ignoring the pain that radiated from her very being, and tried distracting herself with books, music, food. No matter what she did the embarrassment and heartache from that night didn’t dissipate.

“Oh, darling, I hate to see you suffer like this.” Charlotte reached down and patted Beatrice’s thigh before grabbing her hands. “Which is why I went and did something you probably won’t like. However, please know, I did it with your wellbeing as my only motivator.”

Beatrice was too tired to fight. Even turning her head to face her mother took too much effort. Charlotte brought their clasped hands up to her chest. “Look at me, sweetheart.”

Beatrice sighed and dragged her eyes to her mother’s.

“What did you do?” Her voice creaked from misuse.

Charlotte hesitated for a moment. “I think I may have found your match.”

Beatrice swallowed. What did it matter? What did any of this matter? She knew what her future held.

“Mother. It’s not worth it. If I learned anything from these past few weeks is that not only will do just fine on my own but I really do prefer it.”

Charlotte grimaced. “Oh. Come now. I don’t believe that. You and I get along.”

Beatrice quirked an eyebrow causing Charlotte to chuckle.

“Most of the time. And you have friends, Jane, and…” she waved her hand.

“Oh, I don’t know all your friends but you have them and enjoy them.

And they enjoy you, too.” She leaned closer.

“And why wouldn’t they, you’re lovely. Intelligent.

Interesting. And I hear you have the most wonderful of mothers. ” She added with a wink.

Beatrice rolled her lips. She actually did feel slightly better with her mother there. And she was grateful she had shared what was going on, even if it was full of half-truths and omissions. It still made these past few days a bit easier to navigate.

“She is pretty wonderful.” She said with the slightest hints of a smile.

Charlotte beamed a radiant smile back.

“Good. So you’re not upset with me asking this particular suitor over for tea this afternoon?”

Beatrice groaned as she pulled her hands away from her mother so she could cover her face. “Oh, Mama. Why now?” She was not in the mood to talk to any man, let alone meet a new one.

“I’m sorry, Beatrice. I was introduced to him at the start of the season.

If I’m being honest, he didn’t strike me as anything other than a polite young man, nothing out of the ordinary.

But I’ve seen him at a few of the balls and he’s always around people, dancing, laughing and having fun.

I’ve had several conversation with him since then and he’s into many of the same things you are, including books and travel.

When I ran into him today something clicked and I thought you must meet him. ”

Beatrice shook her head. “Fine, but not today.” She pleaded.

Charlotte licked her lips and took a moment. “Beatrice. When I said he was always surrounded by people I meant it, he was the center of attention. But these last few balls I’ve noticed he has been dancing with Lady Catharine, who is nice, however, I don’t see a good match there.”

Beatrice looked at her mother pointedly. “Do you honestly not see a match between him and Lady Catharine? Or are you inserting your nose where it doesn’t belong?”

Charlotte bristled. “I know matches, my dear, and there is not one there.”

Beatrice continued to stare at her mother, doubting her.

“All right fine, they’re a pretty good match, but I think you will be better.” She added, quickly.

“Mama. If he’s interested in Lady Catharine, let him be interested in Lady Catharine.”

Charlotte wrinkled her nose. “You truly are naive when it comes to matters of the heart.”

Beatrice’s body seized up. Unknowingly her mother’s words penetrated her thickest wall of defense and hit her directly in the soul. Her biggest fear going into spinsterhood was becoming one and still being innocent and naive.

If she only knew the heartache her wishes would cause her she might not have set herself on this journey.

She reached up and rubbed the ache in her chest.

“If he was interested in only Lady Catharine, he wouldn’t have accepted our invitation.” Charlotte said triumphantly. “Come now, what do you say? Spend an afternoon with him. Drink some tea.” She looked up to the sky. “It’s a nice day, not too warm to be outside for a nice walk around the gardens.”

Charlotte’s bottom lip protruded like a child’s. “Please, Beatrice. For me?”

Beatrice sighed and rolled her eyes, refusing to smile. Her mother and her dramatics. “Fine. I will meet with… what is his name.”

“An Earl named Amos Duncary.” Charlotte responded.

“Oh. I remember him. You tried to get me to dance with him at one of the balls.” Beatrice’s mind had been fuzzy these last few days, but she faintly remembered hearing his name before.

Charlotte’s eyes rounded. “So you remember him! That is an excellent sign!”

Beatrice shook her head. “Mama, I said I remember his name, not the man. I know nothing of him.”

Charlotte stood up, extending her hand to Beatrice. “Well, now you have the perfect opportunity to meet him. Come, let’s get you ready. You’ve been lounging around the house for days. It’s time to start something new.”

Beatrice took her mother’s hand to stand and together, they walked back to the house.

Start something new.

Perhaps her mother was right. It was time to start something new. Beatrice felt a modicum of weight fall from her shoulders. Having a purpose gave her some relief from the pain she had been carrying.

Her new plan was to meet Amos Duncary and decide if he could help her with her final item, or if he would just be something to hold her mother off her back until the season was officially over.

Only one way to find out.

“He’s here! He’s here!” Charlotte came bursting through the parlor door and quickly sat in the chair opposite of Beatrice. She positioned herself in a way that made it look as if she were there all along and not standing by the front window watching for his carriage.

Beatrice took a deep breath as closed her book and set it on the table next to her.

The door opened and their butler entered with a tall man behind him.

“Lord Amos Duncary, Your Grace.”

At the sound of his name the man stepped forward and into the room.

Beatrice smiled gently at the nervous, wide-eyed Earl standing before her.

“My Lord,” he walked to Charlotte who raised her hand. “He is so good to see you, again.”

Beatrice rolled her lips when her mother dipped her head coyly. If going into the theatre was a reputable career for a woman her mother would have been famous.

The Earl turned his body and faced Beatrice.

She sat straighter under his gaze. Beatrice licked her lips in concentration. She was desperately trying to fend off the inevitable.

She refused to compare Amos to… him. But she was failing. Her very first thought upon seeing the Earl was he had blue eyes, not green. His hair dark blonde, not brown. And his built was tall and lanky, instead of tall with lean muscles.

Beatrice shook the comparison off and raised her hand. “Lord Duncary, how nice it is to finally meet you.”

Amos dipped at the waist. “Yes, my apologies for that. I’ve been meaning to introduce myself for awhile now but I have heard rumblings that you may have…”

Beatrice threw her hand up. “I know the rumors. And they couldn’t be further from the truth.”

Charlotte jolted at Beatrice’s outburst and exchanged a look with Amos. She released a nervous giggle. “Yes, yes, that is all just society gossip for the sake of gossip. She is the new diamond, after all. Disgruntled mamas are going to want to cut her chances.”

Beatrice furrowed her brow. She never really understood the meddling marriage mamas that inserted themselves into every match for the sake of seeming important.

She looked to her mother who was now looking at her with raised eyebrows as her head motioned to Amos.

Beatrice slowly blinked and looked back to Amos. “Sorry for my sudden outburst. As you can tell I am quite tired of hearing that particular rumor.”

Amos frowned, holding his hands to his heart. “I can imagine. My apologies. I did not mean to upset you.”

Beatrice bit her bottom lip. She felt her defensive wall shaking loose. The emotional ups and downs from just this morning to now were exhausting her. Suddenly it felt as if someone placed a boulder on her shoulders.

This was a bad idea.

Charlotte clapped her hands together. “I know. Why don’t we move this outside. It’s a bit stuffy in here, don’t you think?”