Page 40 of The Chains You Defy

“Don’t joke about something like that.”

“Broken promises?”

“Dying.”

His raised voice and the strained tone he’d used confirmed that my attempt at infusing a serious situation with some lighthearted comments had failed epically. I watched him take a deep breath before speaking. “I didn’t want to yell.”

I observed the male next to me. He wore his human Glamour, his gray eyes flooded with exhaustion. The dark circles under his eyes made his glower appear even gloomier, and since I’d never seen his features marred by such obvious blemishes, I figured he was more fatigued than he let on. Was he still in this condition because of his depleted magic, or was something else weighing him down? “Maybe you should rest. You look exhausted.”

“Soon. After we talk.”

“Promise?”

The moment my careless question spilled from my lips, my face contorted. Speaking about making an awkward conversation even worse—asking him to vow something when my broken promise was one of the subjects of our discussion was distasteful.

But still, before I could chastise myself even more, Dion nodded, catching my gaze. “One thing, though, Nayana. Can I—”

“Can you what?”

“Hold you?”

My eyelids fluttered rapidly up and down, and my jaw twitched with the need to drop. I could have imagined many things he might ask me to consider, but this? Especially with the vulnerable expression that had crept into his eyes?

There wasn’t even a real choice to make. I couldn’t do much more than gently nod.

I let out a relieved breath when Nayana agreed to my request. We hadn’t started this conversation on the best foot, and I would have to try hard to turn this around.

From the way her forehead wrinkled as she observed my every move, she was well aware of how out of character I acted. By Kalag, asking politely if I could embrace my own Amplifier? Feeling vulnerable around someone? What kind of craziness had befallen me?

With great caution—I didn’t want to destroy the nest of pillows I’d built—I inched closer to Nayana and, taking care to be as gentle as possible, pulled her into my arms.

Somehow, that she was back and not in danger anymore hadn’t seeped into my consciousness in full yet, and maybe that was what made my insides ache with rawness and uncertainty.

When she voiced shit like her brief attempt at a joke, the ball of anger, anxiety, and frantic drive to act had returned. Of course, I’d find my footing again, but the memory of the wreck of a male I’d been reduced to by her would linger and potentially mess with me at some point.

Part of that situation was her fault, but I couldn’t deny I was responsible as well. Although I’d rather go on a quest to exterminate a benevolent godling before I’d acknowledge responsibilityandadmit to some kind of regret, I allowed this rarity to happen.

Still, there was one truth. I and apologies never went well together since I always stood by my decisions and actions, even when these came back to bite me in the ass later.

There was no right or wrong when picking my path, just resolution, action, and reaction.

Noelk’s balls, I’d even handle the whole situation about my true identity precisely the same if I had to choose again. With one exception—definitely, I wouldn’t allow Nayana to escape, but that was hardly anything I needed to apologize for.

Once, I’d told her I was sorry, and that had been when I’d pushed her away and she’d gotten hurt because of me. Which had been an unfortunate accident, and thus I’dhad no problem uttering the words she probably expected to hear now as well. “You blame me for keeping my secrets.”

“Partly, yes. Your lack of trust hurts, although I can understand why you don’t like running around announcing what vile things you did in your past. But you and me—well, joke’s on me for thinking our connection went deeper than that.”

“Now you’re unfair. How often have I told you I’m not a good person?”

“Plenty. But I believed you meant your murderous tendencies in general, not a cold-blooded act of war and terror costing thousands of lives.”

“It’s hardly my fault if you jump to conclusions.”

“Admittedly, in this, you’re right. But what you’re responsible for is allowing me to bind myself to youfor my entire existencewithout the courtesy of granting me the full truth. My beliefs, Dion. I sacrificed them all because I trusted you, and you took my faith and spat on it. Tell me, how should I not feel hurt and deceived?”

Nayana tensed in my arms, trying to put some distance between us, and my jaw locked. “You exaggerate. Yes, I omitted a few facts, but I never lied to you.”

“Lies or not, nothing changes that I can’t help but ask myself if you were tricking me on purpose to gain more power. After all, that’s quite a villainous thing to do.”