Page 39 of The Boy I Loved (Eternal Hell #1)

My eyes burned with unshed tears, the pressure pushing behind them until they almost leaked. He was too big and too wide. Not anymore than Dom was, but with Dominic, it was different. That was something I’d wanted to do, and he never forced me. I had time to work up to it.

Mason slammed his hips toward my mouth in a sudden, brutal thrust. My nails scratched at his thighs, making him groan out in response.

I couldn’t breathe, couldn’t even think, but he didn’t relent.

His grip on my hair tightened even more until it felt like he might pull it from my scalp.

Saliva dripped from the corners of my mouth, slipping down his shaft until it glistened against his dark blond, pubic hair.

“Breathe through your nose.” He grunted through pants, not bothering to slow down, refusing to offer me an ounce of mercy.

I tried to, but he was moving too fast for me to keep up.

My throat burned, agony erupting through my body as I worked to follow his lead.

My tooth nicked the side of his dick, and he hissed, making me freeze in a mixture of fear and pride.

On one hand, I was glad I’d hurt him. On the other, I was terrified of what he’d do to me as punishment.

Mason tore himself from my lips with a sickening pop. I sucked in as much oxygen as humanly possible, but it wasn’t enough. He jerked me toward him by the grip he had on my hair, his angry gaze searing through my own.

“What kind of game are you playing at?” he snarled.

Fear punched through my chest, and I attempted to push away, to put some distance between us, but it was no use. “I-I’m not,” I stammered.

“I know you know how to suck cock.” He was seething now, the muscle on the side of his neck straining in response. “You fucked Dominic and?—”

“I’ve only done it once,” I rushed to add, wincing from the pain. My hands were braced on his thighs, my body forced to lean over his lap from when he yanked me. “And that was years ago. Before he left.” My voice was shaking, and I knew it made me sound weak, but it was that or crying.

Mason didn’t say anything for a long moment, his expression as unreadable as Vincent’s always was.

Finally, he released my hair, patting the strands in a soothing gesture.

He hummed in response, his eyes softening a fraction.

I didn’t understand this new expression.

How could he go from so angry to … whatever this was in a matter of seconds?

“Come here,” he ordered at last, settling against the sofa. If the clipboard behind him caused any discomfort, he didn’t show it.

“Where?” I asked, pushing away from his lap into a more upright position.

He reached out, curling his fingers around my wrist. He didn’t bother tucking himself away before jerking me onto his lap. He wedged my legs on either side of him, my stomach coiling with disgust. Slowly, he eased my back against his chest, banding me to him with an arm around my waist.

With his free hand, he moved that to the waistband of my panties, toying with the fabric there. A shudder rolled through me, but I couldn’t react.

Nicholas glanced over at us, the girl between his legs, bobbing her head up and down wildly. If he enjoyed what she was doing, he didn’t show it. “What are you doing?” he asked Mason, a small crease forming between his brows. “This is about blowjobs.”

“Change of plans,” Mason replied, slipping his fingers through the barrier separating him from my most intimate area.

“Her lab results haven’t come back yet,” Nicholas warned. “You know the rules. Clay said?—”

Mason scoffed, brushing his fingers over the crease of my pussy, causing me to gasp out in surprise. “It’s not like I’m fucking her.”

Nicholas shook his head in annoyance, but didn’t bother saying anything more on the subject.

My mind short circuited. Clay . As in Dominic’s uncle?

He was behind all of this? Suddenly, all of my previous interactions with him felt much more sinister.

There was no time to dwell on it though, not before Mason eased his pointer finger between my folds and pushed it in.

I squirmed against him, but he didn’t relent, sliding it all the way in until it was buried to the knuckle.

I tried not to look at all the faces surrounding me—of all the girls who watched and judged, probably thrilled that they weren’t the ones who had been chosen.

Humiliation weaved through me, like an invisible brand nobody could see.

But I felt it. I felt it all . The defeat, the disgust, the shame.

Especially when my body started to loosen around his finger and react without my permission.

“Relax,” he encouraged, his hot breath feathering over the top of my ear.

I didn’t want to relax. I wanted to punch him in the face and take off running.

I wanted to hurt him for doing this to me, for treating me like I was nothing more than a hole.

And to think, I’d almost hooked up with him of my own free will.

Repulsion bubbled up within my abdomen, spreading upwards until acid was pushing to the back of my throat.

I’d never felt so hopeless before .

The hand around my waist drifted upwards until he was settling it over one of my breasts, running his thumb over the nipple beneath the thin, lacey fabric.

He pumped his finger in and out of me, my body protesting the movement by refusing to get wet.

It hurt . He didn’t seem that concerned with my pain, though.

He forced his finger through the tight barrier, pumping it in and out rapidly.

“Relax,” he gritted out. “It’ll feel better if you do.”

My thighs trembled, something foreign stirring to life in my lower stomach.

God. No.

No part of me wanted this, so why was my body coming to life with pleasure? I attempted to close my legs, but Mason dropped the hand on my breast to my inner thigh and pushed it open again. A whimper of protest rolled off my tongue, dread coiling inside of me like a snake getting ready to strike.

“That’s it, baby.” He panted. “Your body’s responding so fucking well to me.”

I clamped my eyes shut, sucking in deep breath after deep breath. I tried to think of something—anything—else, but anytime my mind drifted, Mason was there, pulling me right back to this nightmare of a reality.

“So … tight.” He thrusted his finger in and out, the moisture causing it to make squelching sounds.

He’d touched me before, but we didn’t get far before Dominic stormed into the room.

Now, there was no one to save me. He eased a second finger in without warning, electricity shooting down my spine with ferocity.

I bit back the moan threatening to escape, holding my breath the best I could.

But it was hard.

It was so fucking hard to pretend it didn’t feel good.

“Soon, it’ll be my cock instead of my fingers,” he assured me, his words coming out ragged.

He was getting off on this. I could see it when my eyes dropped down, his cock straining and rising with the promise he made.

“Would you like that, Hazel?” he whispered against my ear, making sure no one else could hear.

“We were stopped last time. But next time, we won’t be. ”

A shudder of repulsion tumbled through me in waves, and I gave the slightest shake of my head. He asked me a question, and I answered. Right now, I didn’t give a fuck if he liked my response or not.

“You will. You’ll want it so bad that you’ll beg for it.”

What did he care if I wanted him or not? This wasn’t about consent. It was about power. None of the others cared about if the girl wanted them or not, and from what I could see, Mason was no different.

“Grind on my dick,” he ordered.

A soft gasp of surprise fluttered past my lips, fear shooting through me. Against my better judgement, I shook my head. Mason responded by hooking his fingers inside, positioning them upwards until I was shaking.

“Do it,” he growled. “Or I will fuck you.”

“Y-you can’t,” I stammered, my head whirling. “I thought Clay said?—”

“Do I look like someone who follows the rules?” he shot back. “But if you want to call my bluff, by all means.”

I silently weighed my options. I didn’t doubt he’d follow through with that promise in the slightest. Mason was the kind of guy who took what he wanted, consequences be damned.

Blowing out a breath, I repositioned myself over his lap, making his dick settle between my folds.

My only consolation was that I got to wear my panties.

I rocked forward, bracing my hands on his thighs.

Pleasure shot through my core with ferocity, despair following shortly after.

Mason’s breathing grew ragged, his fingers twisting and curling, and finally, a soft moan of pleasure fled from my defenses. He knew what he was doing and I hated it.

I hated it so damn much .

“Please,” I whispered, tears stinging the corners of my eyes. “Please don’t.”

“Don’t what?” he asked, mocking me. “You don’t want to come?”

I shook my head profusely, hoping he’d spare me of this one thing. I’d be good. They could do whatever they wanted to me. But to get off on this … that would be the worst bodily betrayal I could think of.

I could feel it happening. There was a fire sparking within my core, hedging ever so slightly to the edge it threatened to destroy me with. If he didn’t stop, it would happen—sooner rather than later.

He moved his free hand to my throat and squeezed lightly, brushing his thumb over my pulse.

My body twitched beneath his grip, my hips still rocking against him as he ordered, but that only made it worse, that only brought me closer.

Would it still feel this way if it was an ugly, old man?

Or was Mason just attractive and it didn’t matter?

“Come for me,” he growled. “I want to feel you soak my fucking hand with your release. I want everything you have to give until you’re nothing—nobody—just a pathetic girl who couldn’t help herself.”

I shook my head again, but it was no use. He continued driving his fingers inside of me, hitting that sweet spot that brought me closer and closer with each movement. His hard cock pushed against my clit at the same time, making my head spin.

“Give yourself to me,” he demanded, his voice rough and pained, like it was taking everything in him not to take me right now. His grip tightened around my throat, cutting off my oxygen.

Panic speared through my chest, blossoming until my entire body began to spasm and struggle against him.

“The faster you come, the sooner you get to breathe,” he said. “I’d focus on that rather than getting free, because only one of those things are realistic. ”

I slumped against him, white spots dancing at the edges of my vision.

It wouldn’t take much to get off. I’d been fighting it this entire time, hoping he’d simply give up and move on to the next, but now I realized that wasn’t the case.

I focused on moving my body against his, on his hand between my legs, my mind whirling, going right back to that treehouse—back to the party in one of Rodney’s bedrooms.

Dominic was aggressive, but there was also so much passion there.

The way his mouth moved against mine, the way his body pinned me into the mattress, and his sexy groans when he lost control.

I still hated him for this, but it was hard letting go.

My body trembled violently, electrical sparks shooting through my core. Finally, I gave in.

Mason let out a choked sound, but he didn’t relent, pumping his fingers through my release until we were both drenched in it. I bit back every moan, rolling my lip between my teeth to stop them from filtering through the air.

“You did good,” he praised through heavy breathing. “But next time, you’ll be the one making me cum.” He pulled his hand from my throbbing center, bringing it to his lips and sucking my juices off. His eyes never left mine, something heated in his gaze as he watched me.

With trembling legs, I rose. He didn’t stop me, so I figured I was free to go. My stomach twisted with disgust over what had just happened, guilt filtering through my mind. I made my way to Lauren and Stacy, sinking down into the chair I’d vacated earlier.

I didn’t look at them, didn’t even speak to them. I couldn’t. I wanted to curl up into a ball and cry the rest of the day away. This was only day one of training, and from the sounds of it, it only got worse from here on out.

A lone tear splatted over my cheekbone, but I swiped it away with a flick of my hand. I couldn’t be weak here. I’d do it quietly when no one was watching .

Stacy had endured unimaginable torture and brutality, and yet, the world went on without her.

Mrs. Felps didn’t give a single shit about what happened to her, even told us we couldn’t speak of it any longer.

I didn’t think much of it then, but that was before I knew what she’d actually gone through.

Would the world simply do that with me and Lauren, too?

We were nothing other than insignificant people, forced out of the minds of those who had better things to do—like work a dead-end job and take care of their families.

We simply didn’t matter, and that was the hardest pill to swallow.