Page 40 of The Bonds We Break

To the way he was gone when I woke.

And I’m not sure if the sex was just part of the weird game we’re playing, or if it was something utterly real.

King comes out of the bedroom and tosses his phone on the table. “Motherfucker,” he curses.

“Everything okay?” I ask.

He glares at me. “No, duchess. Everything is not okay. The ATF raided Track’s house this morning. Tessa’s in fucking tears. Track’s been taken away again. And this is all because of your brother. So, no. Everything is most definitely not okay. I need to go.”

“You only just got here. Why don’t you rest for a moment?”

But as he pulls on his hoodie, a second phone rings, and I recognize my ring tone.

“You have my phone?”

He pulls it from the back pocket of his jeans and glances at it. “It’s your brother,” he says. “He’s been messaging you. Tell him you’re at a friend’s cabin with shitty reception because of the storm. Remember I still have a man on him.”

When he hands me the phone, I do as King says and answer the video call.

“Hey, Raester,” he says, and it’s a relief to hear his voice. To see his smile. To see the bruises have faded and he isn’t carrying the pained look in his eyes that had haunted him in the nearly four weeks since this all happened.

“Morning, Ike.” It takes me a moment to find my feet in the conversation. It’s a connection to the outside world at last, and I didn’t realize how deprived of interaction I’d been feeling.

“Where are you at?”

I glance up at King coolly. “I’m staying at a friend’s place.”

“A guy friend?”

I attempt a smile, trying to find the facial composure I would usually have if my brother were sticking his nose into my love life. “A none-of-your-business friend. Anyway, how’s the trip? Ready to come home?”

There’s a pause, and then my brother turns the camera to the beautiful gardens surrounding his accommodation. Deep green and vivid pink hues.

“Going to be hard to leave this, but I’m ready,” he says.

“Gardens really are the most amazing thing,” I say. I think about their connection to life and joy, to the changing seasons. You can change the fate of a garden in the same way you can change the fate of your life. “You can take the most barren piece of land, something that looks so sad and unhappy, and with a little tender, loving care, turn it into something so beautiful.”

He flips the camera back to himself. “Just wanted to share it with you. Are you good?”

The fact he saw a beautiful garden and thought of me fills my heart with goodness. I block King out as he glares at me. I’m not letting him take this small moment of happiness away from me. “Yeah. I’m good.”

“You wanna talk?” Ryker asks.

Guess I’m not being as convincing as I hoped. “And make you miss one of your last moments in paradise? No. I’m fine. And remember, I know you’re going to face some difficulties when you get back, fitting back in with the club. But know you have my blessing, for what it’s worth.”

“Yeah?” He seems surprised by my answer, but I mean it. And I’m going to make sure I do everything I can with King to make sure he stands by his word.

“I know how much it means to you. And there isn’t much I wouldn’t do for you to be happy.”

“Thanks, Raester. I love you. You need me, call, yeah?”

“I love you too.” And with that, I end the call. I take a deep breath and pause for a moment. Before the call, King was about to storm out of here and leave me again. But I can’t influence him if he’s there and I’m here. I need him to stay with me or take me with him. Being apart neither helps me nor Ryker.

“Good girl,” King says, and my body warms with praise, even as my head tries to tell me to ignore him.

His words belie the tension lines between his brows.

“What was all that garden bullshit?” he asks. He’s more perceptive than I gave him credit for, and I look up at him, trying to find the calm I felt when he held me in his arms the other evening.