Page 68 of The Body in the Backyard

Nick gathered the comforter around him with an irritable flourish and got out of bed. “I’m gonna hit the gym so I don’t hit anything else,” he said, looking pointedly at Lily.

“You guys should have a TV in here,” Lily said.

He growled and slammed the bathroom door.

Ignoringthe roar of the vacuum cleaner and the clink of glass bottles coming from the sunroom turned rave, Nick stalked into the kitchen, muttering about roommates and boundaries.

Gabe stood at the sink, serenely washing the dishes.

“Hey,” he said, slapping a hand to Gabe’s shoulder. Turning, the man mountain gripped Nick’s forearm with one slippery bear paw, twisted, and efficiently tossed him to the floor.

Nick landed with anoof.

“What was that for, you hairless Chewbacca?” he wheezed, fighting to get the air back in his lungs.

“Oh dear. I seem to have misunderstood. I thought you wanted me to demonstrate an effective self-defense move,” Gabe said innocently.

“Why in the hell would you think that? I just wanted to talk to you,” Nick rasped.

“Because you were so easily defeated by tiny birds last night. Do you not remember? Perhaps the trauma is affecting your short-term memory.”

“Shit. You’re being sarcastic, aren’t you?”

“Riley said sarcasm is a tool for humor. I am being amusing,” Gabe explained.

“Fuckin’ hilarious.” Nick accepted the gigantic hand Gabe offered and let the man pull him to his feet.

“I agree. I am only sorry I did not have an audience to appreciate my humor. What is it you wished to discuss?”

Nick cracked his neck on his way to the coffeepot. “I have a question on a hypothetical situation. No sarcasm required.”

“Please share your hypothetical situation.”

He reached for a mug. “Say someone has a psychic in their life, and they need to keep something from her.”

“If we are discussing my very good friend Riley, I do not like this conversation.”

“Relax, hot-air balloon,” Nick said, pouring himself a cup of coffee.

“I do not understand that particular reference.”

“I don’t know. Balloons are big. You’re big. I just woke up. Gimme a break.”

“Ah. I see. Please continue with the topic I am not enjoying.”

“Say I want to surprise Riley with something. How does a mere mortal go about surprising a psychic?”

“Is this a good surprise?” Gabe asked with suspicion.

“It better be. I want to do something completely out of character.”

“You wish to become well-mannered and charming?”

Gabe’s insult game was strong in the morning. Nick didn’t care for it.

“A, I’m charming as fuck. B, I’m sure as hell not going to tell you since you basically broadcast the NC-17 version of your date with her sister to Riley yesterday.”

“I did not mean to share my intimate memories with Riley. But my joy made it difficult for me to concentrate.”