Page 38 of The Body in the Backyard

“So what’s on the PI agenda today? We dragging in a few suspects and interrogating them?” Mrs. Penny asked. “I packed my ski masks, just in case.”

A bolt of inspirational lightning struck Nick. “You can’t interrogate suspects today. You’ll be too busy going undercover.”

The old woman perked up. “I will?”

“Yeah, Penny. Whoever is after Griffin is going to catch on fast that he’s got security, especially with Josie lurking around playing with her knife collection. I need you to go undercover as his grandma. Don’t leave his side all day.”

The plan he thought of ten seconds ago was sounding better and better. Griffin was going to be laid up from last night’s injuries. Mrs. Penny could babysit him from the couch. Meanwhile, he and Riley could start digging into actual suspects.

Mrs. Penny rubbed her hands together. “Oh boy. Do I get to carry a gun?”

He thought fast. “You need to sell this grandma thing. The only weapons you can take are knitting needles.”

“No problemo! I can still do a lot of damage with those,” she said cheerfully.

“Who wants a nice pancake?” Riley crooned, dangling one in front of Burt’s suspicious face. “Just come alittlecloser, and you can have this.”

“I thought you said no people food,” Lily said.

“I’m just trying to get him to come close enough that I can wipe off all the cheese doodle dust before he goes and rolls on someone’s bed.”

Several loud whacks rang out from under the sink, and a geyser of water erupted. The noise startled Burt, who backed into a chair, knocking it over.

Riley dove for him as he streaked past. Lily squealed as dog and human barreled by. The plate of pancakes went flying.

“Fred!” Nick yelled.

The soggy senior slopped his way out from under the sink.

“Yeah?” he gurgled.

“Turn off the fucking water!”

Burt was distracted by the screaming and the flying breakfast food. Riley used it to her advantage and tackled him to the floor. But not before he hoovered up three of the pancakes.

The door swung open.

“Good morning,” Gabe said. His dark skin glistened with a coating of sweat. “May I be of some assistance?”

“You.”Nick pointed at Fred.

They were lined up in the living room in their soggy clothes. All except for Willicott, who had missed out on the chaos because he’d been too busy clogging the toilet upstairs.

Fred pointed to himself. “Me?”

Nick ripped a piece of paper off the top of the notepad and slapped it to the muscly senior’s chest. “This is your honey-do list for the day. You’re in charge of mopping up the kitchen, calling my plumber cousin, and reminding him he owes me big. Then you’re boarding up the broken windows from the party and Mrs. Penny’s breaking and entering. You will use plywood, a hammer, and nails. No power tools.”

Fred saluted. “Aye, aye, captain!”

Nick moved down the line and handed Lily her own sheet of paper. “You are going to call these three contractors about your roof and ask for a quote and a timeline. Hire the one with the shortest timeline. I don’t care if they replace your roof with thatched grass and bee colonies. Get it done.”

She hugged the list to her chest. “I just love it when you play drill sergeant.”

Nick stopped in front of Mr. Willicott and handed the man a roll of dog doody baggies. “Since you’re so well versed in bowel movements, you are going to walk Burt until every single cheese doodle has been evacuated.” He looked down at Burt. The dog’s tail swished back and forth across the floor with vigor. “Andyouare going to make surehefinds his way back.”

Mrs. Penny was next in line.

“You already have your assignment. Riley and I will drive you over to Gentry’s. Don’t blow it. Don’t let him out of your sight. If anyone suspicious shows up, I wanna know. If he talks to someone on the phone, I want you eavesdropping.”