Page 122 of The Body in the Backyard

Nick scrubbed a hand over his jaw. “Sounds like he’s got a temper with private-plane-and-hit-man money to back it up.”

“Next up is Kiki Knappenberger. Nice find, by the way, Ry,” Brian said, rearranging more tabs.

She preened. “Thanks.”

“Not only does our new pal Kiki have reason to hate Griffin, she also set off our resident psychic’s alarm bells, and for good reason.” He pulled up a spreadsheet. “I couldn’t dig too deeply into her finances without raising suspicions, but Ididdiscover that she has a recurring subscription of gummy dicks sent to Griffin’s address every month for the last six months.”

“Heh.” Nick chuckled in approval.

“Thanks to these grainy-as-shit photos Willicott took with an actual film camera, we also know that she followed Griffin to lunch.” Brian clicked through a series of photos that showed Mr. Willicott’s confused face as he apparently tried to use the lens as the eyepiece. Over his shoulder, Kiki could be seen in oversize sunglasses and an honest-to-goodness trench coat, sneaking up to Griffin’s car.

“Stalking is a step up from hilarious dick-shaped pranks,” Nick noted.

Brian drum-rolled his hands on the counter that served as his desk. “Speaking of people who have reasons to want revenge on Griffin, that brings us to—pause for a moment of silence because Josie said we are absolutely not naming the baby—Chupacabra Jones.”

“You’ve still got a couple months to wear her down,” Nick said.

“We’re not naming our baby Chupacabra,” Josie bellowed from the opposite side of the house.

“Your wife scares me,” Nick whispered.

“Join the club,” Brian said cheerily.

“Back to Chupacabra. Did you find anything out about this mysterious Pete?” Riley prompted.

Brian triumphantly tapped at the keyboard. “Do you meanthisPete?” he asked with a flourish as a face appeared on the screen.

“I don’t know. Maybe?”

“Peter Rodman, age thirty-three, former limo driver and second cousin to Chupacabra Jones, lost his job when the Escalade he was driving struck a woman outside the Harrisburg Airport when he was dropping off a client. The woman was fine thanks to her impressive array of luggage taking the brunt of the low-speed impact.”

“What does this have to do with Griffin?” she asked.

“Patience, my psychic friend,” he said. “According to the police report, the driver claimed it was the passenger who grabbed the wheel and turned into the woman because—and I quote—‘he thought someone on the sidewalk recognized him and might want his autograph.’”

“Gee. I wonder who that could be?” Riley asked dryly.

Nick pinched the bridge of his nose. “New rule. No more working for someone I hate.”

“No offense, but that would severely limit our income potential,” Brian pointed out.

“So Pete got fired,” Riley said, bringing them back to the topic at hand.

“Firedandsued, by the victim and—wait for it—his passenger, who claimed he was injured and lost weeks of income while recuperating on medical leave. Pete’s insurance company settled the suits and then did what insurance companies do. They sued him for $150,000 to recoup their losses. Funny thing is Griffin didn’t claim he was injured in the accident until a week later, when his lawyer pushed him into the police station all bandaged up in a wheelchair. Even funnier, Pete insists that when he jumped out of the car to see if the woman was all right, Griffin walked right into the airport and got on a plane.”

“Did the cops interview Griffin at the scene?” Nick asked.

Brian shook his head. “Nope. In fact, there seemed to be some confusion about whether Pete actually had a passenger until Griffin showed up a week later, claiming to have been injured.”

“So Griffin ruins the cousin’s life, and Chupacabra installs herself as the couple’s personal trainer to do what? What’s her endgame?” Riley asked.

“Payback? Maybe she wants to drop a weight on his head?” Nick guessed.

“At this point, who doesn’t?” Brian said, gesturing to his screens.

Nick blew out a breath. “Thorn, I need you to do something disgusting. Something horrible and potentially emotionally scarring.”

“I already told you last night I’m fine with your Princess Leia fantasy.”