Page 47

I wasn’t a shifter, so I couldn’t truly understand the significance of a first shift.

But I wanted to be there for my son, to make sure he wasn’t in pain or terrified.

That was what I was most worried about. Cole?

He was thinking of all the things he’d missed in the past. I remembered the look in his eyes when I’d shown him the photos of Ashton as a kid—all the big milestones he’d missed, and how awful he felt for missing them.

This was another milestone, perhaps the biggest, and he was beating himself up for it.

As we entered the city limits of Harbor Mills, I thought about how to ease his worry. But there was nothing I could say. Nothing could pull a father out of that kind of self-abuse.

The truck nearly tipped up on two wheels as we turned into my driveway. Before we’d even come to a stop, Cole let out a soul-rending groan.

“No!”

As I looked up, I saw what had made him react. Trent was leaning against the porch railing, a grim smile on his lips. A young, beautiful wolf sat on its haunches beside him, panting and gazing at us with the closest thing to a smile a canine could manage.

The wolf looked nearly identical to Cole’s. That was Ashton. My baby boy. I grinned at him through the windshield, tears forming in my eyes. He was beautiful. As surreal as it was, I couldn’t stop myself from breathing a sigh of relief that it was finally done. He’d made it through.

Forcing myself to tear my eyes from Ashton, I spared a glance at Cole. He looked devastated. Heartbroken wasn’t a good enough word for the expression on his face. If I had to describe it, he looked like he did when his mother had died. It was that level of devastation.

I put my hand on his shoulder. “Cole?—”

He shrugged off my hand and got out of the truck. “Let’s go.”

With a weary sigh, I got out as well. Cole plastered a fake smile on his face and hurried toward Ashton.

“Hey, buddy.” He laughed. “You look so good.”

He knelt and rubbed behind Ashton’s ears.

The wolf that was my son closed his eyes in pleasure as Cole scratched his neck.

I could still see the pain in Cole’s eyes, but he was doing a good job hiding it for Ashton’s sake.

At least that was something. I never would have been able to forgive him if he’d made this special moment about himself.

If I knew one thing about Cole Garrett, it was that he always tried to put others first, even when he was in pain.

“How’d he do?” Cole asked Trent.

Trent knew Cole as well as I did, and when he saw Cole’s face, his eyebrows knitted together. Trent looked almost embarrassed that he’d been here instead of Cole.

“He did good,” Trent said as he patted Ashton’s head. “He’s a natural. Happened fairly easily.”

Ashton stood and padded down the steps to me, and I knelt in front of him. I could still see my son in the wolf’s eyes. My boy was in there.

“I’m very proud of you,” I said, stroking his head.

Ashton whined happily and wound his way around my legs almost like a cat. Cole had done the same thing long ago, marking me with his scent. Ash was making sure the whole world knew I was his mother.

“That’s an alpha thing,” Cole commented. “Showing everyone that you’re under his protection. That you are his mother, and any other wolf needs to respect it.” Cole grinned grimly. “Or expect his wrath.”

Without another word, Cole shifted, dropping down to four feet and padding toward Ashton. The two wolves sniffed each other, then rubbed against one another. A father greeting his son.

Cole nudged my hand with his muzzle, and I took his face in my hands, looking into his wolf eyes. I could still see the anguish and heartache there. He was beating himself up for not being here.

“You are a good father,” I said quietly. “Everything is okay. I promise.”

Ashton’s ears twitched, and he tilted his head his head to the side.

Cole’s wolf dipped its head and licked my hand. He was the wolf, and the wolf was him, but they still had somewhat differing personalities. Right now, after how sullen and pissy Cole had been, I liked his wolf better.

Cole chuffed at Ashton, some sort of wolf language I didn’t understand, and the two sprinted off toward the woods together. The first nighttime run together. Standing there, arms crossed over my chest, I watched them until they vanished into the woods.

“Cole’s upset,” I said, keeping my eyes on the forest.

“Yeah,” Trent said, drawing the word out in a regretful tone.

“It came out of him in waves. All that frustration, sadness, and anger. It was powerful enough that I could almost taste it. Avery, I tried. I really did. I had Ashton doing special breathing and relaxation exercises I learned in the military. I even tried to get him to lie down and rest, hoping it would slow the change. I knew Cole wanted to be here for it. I thought we had at least until the full moon.”

“That’s what Cole said.”

A wolf howled in the distance. A moment later, another answered it in almost the same pitch. All I could do was hope that Cole could put aside his sadness and regret and enjoy this moment with his son. Ashton deserved to enjoy this night, even if Cole was heartbroken.