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COLE

S itting on my porch, I gazed out at the warm summer day and wondered how the fuck everything had gone wrong so fast. One minute, things were really looking up, and the next, it was all crashing down.

It was ridiculous and maddening. Fate was fucking with me, giving me enough hope to let the flower in my heart bloom before crushing the petals with a steel-toed boot.

Why the hell had I spoken to Avery like that?

What had gotten into me? The answer to that was fear.

I’d been terrified of telling her the truth, of letting her know the kind of trouble she was in.

That realization could scar someone, and I didn’t want that for her.

Better if she and Ashton left without knowing why.

Ashton. The rage on his face when he’d come rushing out of his room made a lump form in my throat.

That anger as he growled, all of it focused on me.

It had broken my heart. All I wanted was to be a good father to him.

And what had I done? A few weeks after meeting him, I’d caused a scene at his house, made him think I was disrespecting his mother.

Perhaps even threatening her in some way. What a great guy I was.

Maybe Kyle was right. Dad and I might have a lot in common, and being shitty fathers was at the top of the list.

The road was calling to me, just like it had the other morning in Atlanta. It would be so easy to vanish. Pack my shit, get out of Avery’s hair, let Ashton live his life without a worthless jackass of a father. He’d be better off without me. Avery would be better off without me.

Like an insistent angel on my right shoulder, Trent’s voice came back to me. There were other people besides Ashton and Avery relying on me. The pack was depending on me. Trent was right when he said I couldn’t up and leave, though the more time that passed, the more it appealed to me.

There was too much to figure out. I refused to tell them what was happening.

They’d already been through enough with how things had gone at the end with my father.

We’d need to find a way to sort this all out quickly and quietly.

Trent was the best to do that. I refused to let Kyle win.

No matter what. We’d handle this one way or another.

I’d never taken another life. Trent had taken many in the service, and I didn’t know how he could live with that stain on his soul.

Either way, it looked like it was going to happen.

If I wanted Harbor Mills to succeed, whether with me at the helm or not, Kyle had to die.

I was the acting alpha. No matter how much I wanted to, I couldn’t command Trent to do it.

This was my burden to bear, and it had to be me. The mere thought of it made me sick.

My dark thoughts shattered when my phone rang.

My heart lurched when I read Avery’s name on the screen.

It had been over twenty-four hours since I’d last spoken to her, but I’d thought it would take longer for her to be ready to talk.

I was going to go down there soon and broach the subject.

In fact, I’d been trying to convince myself to get in my truck.

Could she have read my mind and decided to head me off?

With a trembling finger, I answered the call.

“Avery?”

“Hello, Cole. I think you need to come to the house—now. I need to talk to you.”

There was some strange finality to her voice that made my stomach sink and my heart ache. I hated that sound, and I hated it more because I’d caused it, and would make it worse. Though, if that was the cost of keeping her safe, I’d do whatever it took.

“Uh, I was actually on my way.”

“Yeah? Well, come on down. I’m free. You said in your text we could talk, and I want to talk.”

With that, the line went dead. It was like I’d been stabbed in the heart. My world, so recently built back up, was crumbling apart. And it was all my fucking fault. It was always me doing this. I stood and walked down the porch steps to my truck. Better to get it done.

On the drive over, I did my best to put on a brave face and prepare myself.

I’d need to stress to Avery how important it was to leave town.

If I had to, I could be a dick again. Maybe, if I pissed her off enough, she’d take Ashton and go.

Hopefully, it wouldn’t come to that. I didn’t want her last memory of me to be like that.

She stood on her front porch as I pulled in, hands on her hips and staring at me with a stony expression. When I opened the door, she waved at me to come up.

“We can talk inside,” she said.

I glanced at the house uncertainly. “Is that okay? Uh, am I welcome?”

Avery let out a frustrated sigh. “Ashton was standing up for me, Cole. He still likes you. He still wants to be around you. He’s a kid, and he was pissed. He’ll get over it. Besides, he’s in his room.”

Nodding, I followed her inside. She gestured toward one of the kitchen chairs.

“Sit.”

I plopped down, obeying her command without hesitation.

“Avery, I need to tell you?—”

“Trent came by earlier and told me everything.”

I froze, mouth still half open, an unspoken syllable on my lips, and stared at her, dumbfounded.

“What… what do you mean? Trent was here? He told you what?”

Eyes locked on mine, Avery said, “He told me about Kyle and Dallas, about the threat on our lives, and that you have to leave town. Was this not something you thought I needed to know? Like, at all? This is my life, too, you know?”

For a moment, I couldn’t process her words. I was too shocked and pissed at Trent for coming here behind my back. For telling Avery what I’d wanted kept a secret.

“Avery, you don’t understand?—”

“Understand what? That Kyle is threatening to kill your brother if you don’t comply?

That he’ll kill or do God knows what to me if I’m still in town?

He might kill my son?” She flipped a hand in the air and slammed it down on the table in frustration.

“Or do I not understand the part about how you were going to come here and force us apart? To break things off, or make me reject you? Is that the part I don’t get? ”

Goddamn it, Trent , I snarled in my head. My wolf was growling and pacing the perimeter of my mind, whining and pawing the ground. He was fucking furious with me for what I was trying to do.

“I didn’t want you to be part of this,” I managed. “That’s all. I wanted you to be safe, no matter what.”

“And is that how you think a partnership works, Cole?”

“I don’t… I thought…” I shook my head.

“I’m not part of the pack,” Avery said. “I’m supposedly your fated mate, right? That means you don’t get to keep shit like this from me, even if it’s for my own good. How the fuck am I supposed to help you lead this pack if you don’t know how to lead yourself?”

“Hang on.” I didn’t like where this was going. “What are you trying to say?”

Avery leaned forward. “You can’t always run from your problems. You did it once, and I bet you’re doing it again. Are you going to run, Cole?”

Now, my wolf felt backed into a corner. So did I. This was not how I thought this conversation would go. I didn’t have answers, and it felt like Avery was looking right into my soul.

“That’s what I thought,” she said, leaning and dragging a hand over her face. “Cole, do you really think Kyle will keep his word? You do realize how many people are going to suffer if you leave the pack and run, right?”

“I know,” I said. “I’m not running. Not yet, anyway. This is beside the point. Did you call me down here to berate me? Because if so, I’d prefer we not do this.”

“I called you here to make sure you do what’s right by your pack.

Even if you handle Kyle, you can’t leave again.

I know you never wanted to be alpha, but you’re the best man for the job.

This is your calling. If you run off into the sunset, with Kyle dealt with or not, then you won’t be any better than your father. ”

The words slammed into me like bullets. I’d had my own worries about that, but hearing it voiced out loud was a shock. It sounded much worse, more visceral and shameful than the depressed voice in my head.

My emotions must have been written on my face because Avery scrutinized me, then nodded.

“You’ve been running for years, Cole. It’s what you do best. You can’t run from this.

Not this time. How long before the guilt of it all sends you to the bottom of a bottle like your dad?

How would you feel, knowing you’d left your pack—a pack that by all rights belongs to our son one day—and left it in the hands of that psycho Kyle? ”

It would eat me alive. I wouldn’t have anything. No family, no pack. I’d spiral. I already knew it, and it hadn’t even happened yet.

Sitting there, looking at her, I wondered what I could say. How I could apologize. It seemed that the more I wanted to run, the less sense it made.

“I’m taking Ashton. We’re leaving town.” Her voice was calm but stern.

I’d wanted that, or thought I did, but actually hearing it was like getting kicked in the balls.

“I know you need to focus on what’s coming,” she went on. “I have a hunch it’ll get ugly, so I need to think of my son’s safety. I don’t want him anywhere near whatever might happen.”

“Okay,” I said, and I was shocked at how weak my voice sounded when it came out. “Well, I think that’s smart. I want Ashton safe, too. But, uh, what about us? You and I, I mean.”

She gave a single shake of her head. “I don’t think now’s the right time to explore a new relationship. You have a ton of shit to work through, Cole. And it doesn’t look like you want to work them through with me. That’s fine with me, by the way. Better to find that out now than down the road.”

My wolf whined and snarled. I’d never, in my entire life, felt him react this way.

Not even the first time I left Avery. I could actually sense him raging at me.

I had no doubt that if it had been possible, he would have lashed out and bitten me for causing this, for pushing our mate away.

As close as we were in spirit, we were still separate enough to disagree on major decisions like this.

Her words sent a lead ball dropping into my stomach, tearing through my intestines. Her flippant and emotionless tone hurt the most. Had I broken this so badly that she didn’t even feel anything at severing this bond? The thought alone made my gorge rise, and I had to swallow bile back.

“Are you rejecting me?” I asked, my voice thick with emotion.

Avery stared back at me, placidly at first, then her chin and lower lip quivered. Tears welled in her eyes, and she cleared her throat.

“My heart won’t let me do that. Not yet. All I know is that I have to separate myself from you until you learn to become the mate I need you to be. The mate I deserve. Right now, you are not that person.”

I stared back at her.

I couldn’t argue with that.