Page 28

I was ready to burst at the seams when Beckett lifted his head to gaze down at me with eyes so dark and so wonderfully warm.

“Wow,” breathily, he shook his head and repeated. “Wow.”

“I know.” I whispered, not knowing what else to say.

“I should,” he shifted, pushing up onto the palms of his hands. “I should turn out the lights.”

Goodness, I hadn’t even noticed they were on. The moment was a face-palming moment I should have anticipated, and acted accordingly. That meant I should have already turned off the lights to avoid this about to be very awkward situation. Live and learn, right?

“Sure.”

Beckett hoisted his big body up, and embarrassed, I rolled onto my side to look into the small flames dancing in the hearth.

Beneath the thick blanket, I was wearing an adorable lavender satin nighty that was bordered in thin white lace.

It was sexy and something I never would have worn if Raina hadn’t brought it out, stating, “I figured you’d need something a little friskier than fleece if you were to seduce that man. ”

I hadn’t been planning to seduce anyone. I most definitely hadn’t been planning to wear a little purple nighty in the hopes that maybe I might influence Beckett to take our bedroom play a little further—as in all the way.

Now, the satin felt like acid on my flesh as I waited with a wildly racing pulse for the man to return. What had I been thinking? If I’d screamed my want for him from the tallest building on earth, I couldn’t have made it more obvious.

I was suddenly regretting my attempt at brazenness when I felt the blanket lift.

And then I felt Beckett’s body slide close to mine.

The only light igniting the large room was from the glow of the low flames, so when Beckett reached out to place a hand on my waist, his breath hitched at the feel of the satin covering my skin.

That was when I felt the blanket rise and I slammed my eyes closed in horror.

This was so not how I’d wanted things to play out. It wasn’t even remotely like I’d imagined when I’d fantasized this wonderful evening. This was a freaking mess with a capital M.

His hand returned to my waist to pull me onto my back. I still didn’t open my eyes. I couldn’t. If I did, I was certain he’d see every ounce of horror I harbored inside. God, I didn’t want him to see.

“Amara,” his voice was husky and that surprised me. “Open your eyes, beautiful.”

I shook my head—like a silly little loser. God, I was going to kill Raina for convincing me that I needed satin and lace.

“I feel silly.” I whispered, refusing to open my eyes.

“You look amazing.” He replied. “Beautiful. Breathtaking. Not silly.”

I opened my eyes. “Beckett,” my breath caught at the heat in his. “I . . .”

“You?” He pressed, his hand moving slowly over my belly, petting the satin in a way that had me feeling achy with need.

“I just wanted to,” yep, I was going to kill my friend. “I wanted to be beautiful for you.”

“You’ve always been beautiful, Amara.”

“And I wanted you to want me.”

He laughed. The sound was deep, and low, and husky. It made me shiver. “I don’t think there’s been one day since I met you that I haven’t wanted you.”

I blushed. “I don’t mean like that,” he cocked his head and I continued to explain. “I mean, want me, want me. Like physically.”

“Amara,”

Oh, when he said my name like that.

“Yes?”

“I don’t think there’s been a day since I first met you where I haven’t wanted you, in every way.”

Oh wow. Well, I wasn’t expecting that. Nor did I know quite how to reply. “Beckett,”

He dipped his head to kiss me. This time his lips on mine were slow and soft.

I opened beneath him and tasted the taste that was uniquely Beckett when he slid his tongue inside my mouth, gently claiming me.

His hand was still on my belly, but his body wasn’t where I needed it to be.

He was on his side in the bed of blankets, beside me.

I wanted him on top of me. I wanted to feel him everywhere.

I wanted him to conquer me in every way.

I ached for it so acutely, so intensely, I couldn’t fathom spending another minute without it.

“Please,” the word was a soft moan against his mouth. I felt his lips quirk in response and my belly dipped.

“Please?” He rumbled, the sound moving—and I mean moving through me.

“I want you.” I said, finally admitting the words aloud.

Beckett stiffened as he lifted his head to look down into my face. His hand was still on my belly, now motionless. His body was frozen beside mine.

“We don’t have to do that, Amara. Not yet. I don’t want,”

I cut him off. “I know you’re trying to take it slow for me, but I’m ready. I want it to be with you. I want this. Tonight.”

I couldn’t believe I had the courage to speak those words to this man. But they were the honest truth. They were raw and real. They were without regret.

This man had taken a woman who was terrified of everything—good and bad.

He’d cared for me and proved to me that life could be beautiful.

Happiness wasn’t something to be guarded under lock and key, but rather, happiness was meant to be shared.

Since Beckett, my happiness had begun to shimmer and shine.

There was no doubt it was still shy and a little hesitant, but the ease with which it showed itself was beginning to grow more and more frequent.

Again, I owed this to Beckett. To his laughter, his teasing, and all the safety he’d given to me these last months.

I owed him happiness, and I wanted to gift the one thing I had that I cherished like nothing else. I wanted to gift him my innocence. I wanted to gift him my unspoken, but not any less valuable, love.

Slowly, Beckett lowered his head, pressing his lips to mine.

His kiss was warm and gentle. My insides were filled with fluttering as his big hand moved over my belly, to my side—up and down.

He explored me, everywhere, over the warm satin that clung to my body.

And when his hand roamed north, to the heavy swell of my breast, my breath caught. He palmed me there, kissing me deeper.

Liquid heat pooled between my legs as need pulsed alive and determined within me.

I craved. I craved for something I couldn’t quite explain.

There was a deep hollowness pulsing almost painfully inside of me as I kissed him, my hands roaming over the smooth skin of his back.

Muscles rippled beneath my fingertips as he shifted, moving his body slightly above mine.

A knee slipped between my legs and I let him in, eagerly pleading without words for his nearness.

I could feel his want, hard, and thick, and long, against my thigh as he continued to kiss me.

I wanted him to move. I wanted him between my legs where I knew, instinctively, I would find relief for the new build-up of sweet agony that had settled itself in the pit of my belly.

I just wanted him. This. Us.

“Beckett,” I moaned, pleading. God, if he wanted me to beg, right now, I’d beg. I needed him in a way I’d needed nothing else. Not even water after a long walk in the desert could compare.

“Are you sure, Amara?”

“Yes.”

“You won’t regret me?” His eyes were gentle, but there was a fierceness I couldn’t ignore burning in the depths. “Promise me, when it’s over you won’t shut down? You won’t shut me out?”

Pushing up onto my elbows, I pressed my lips to the corner of his. I kissed his lips, his chin, and his throat. It was at the hollow, when I kissed him one last time, that I whispered, “I promise.”

A growl of broken will sounded as he lifted his body from mine.

For a moment, I was confused when he stood and moved quickly to his suitcase across the room.

Then I was red in the face as I realized just what he’d crossed the room for.

A small silver packet between his fingers twinkled in the light as he strode back to my makeshift bed.

His desire for me was on display, not in the least affected by his walk to his suitcase.

His eyes were dark on me as his hands moved to the waist of his pajamas.

And then I watched as he pushed the material from his hips, for the first time revealing himself to me.

I never thought I’d ever think the male body was beautiful—but Beckett was.

He was all hard coated in satiny softness.

I watched, my mouth going dry as he lowered his body to the blankets. “You can change your mind, Amara.”

Turning into him, I whispered, “I don’t want to change my mind. I want this.”

And oh, did I ever want this. Just seeing all that he was had the ache I’d felt moments earlier intensifying tenfold.

So when his hands moved to the lace hem of my nighty, and he tugged upward whispering, “Sexy as this is, it’s got to go,” I let him.

We explored one another inch by inch until there wasn’t an inch unexplored.

Beckett spent what felt like hours exploring my body until the flames in the hearth were nothing more than simmering coals.

Then he reached for the condom, rolled it on, and covered me with his body.

My heart raced in my chest as my legs spread open for him, wrapping around his waist. He settled himself against my body, his lips against mine as he pushed slowly inside.

It was when he’d rooted himself there that he whispered, “I’m in love with you,” and I knew that no matter how long I’d have lived, I’d never have found a moment as perfect as this to give the gift of me to this man.