Page 15 of Tamed Wolf (Rejected Mates of the Shelter #4)

Lark, Now

I stumble to my room, feeling so stupid for ruining what was a really good day. Probably top five most pleasant since I landed here at the shelter, actually, and one stupid little remark that I’m sure he meant nothing by, and I had to go and bite his head off like a psychopath.

The worst part is that I probably could have easily talked myself into hanging out with them again, because I was already fighting the daydreams of finding a pack that wanted to be with me.

Good thing I’m here to get in my way.

I make it to my room and fit my key in the lock, but my hand is able to turn the handle before the key does anything. I carefully open the door, and there, sitting on my spring-filled bony mattress, is one of the men responsible for getting me into this whole mess. “What the hell are you doing here? And how did you even get in?”

Ivan sits up slowly, trying not to spook me, but I’m too pissed off to be spooked.

He puts his hands out, placatingly. “Just hear me out, sweetheart—"

“No. Get. Out.”

He sighs as if I’m the one that’s the disappointment in this scenario, making no move to get up. “I just want to talk. Please?”

It’s late, and I definitely don’t want to be the one that keeps all her neighbors awake, so I close my door and sit against it, hanging my head in exhaustion. “Stay the fuck over there.”

“I…I came here to apologize.”

I snort but hold my position.

“That’s all? I thought you’d be happy.”

Okay fine, I’ll look at his stupid face. “You said you came here to apologize.”

“Yeah.”

“And are you going to?”

Now he’s looking at me like I’m crazy. “I just did.”

Is it weird that I want to laugh? “No, you said you came here to apologize. You know that’s different than actually apologizing, right? If you’re going to apologize, you have to actually say the words, ‘ I apologize’, and if you’re seriously hoping to apologize for all the shit you’ve put me through over the years, you better have a hell of a lot more words to offer me after you start there.”

Ivan rubs his face, and I notice the dark rings under his eyes, and take in the hair that’s shorter than I’ve ever seen it, buzzed like Trevor likes to keep it. “I fucked up, okay? Is that what you want me to say? When we met you, I wasn’t ready to settle down, and I probably resented you. You were so young and beautiful, and I think part of me knew I’d never be enough for you, so maybe I sabotaged myself. I don’t know, but I’ve been actually trying to fix myself, and every day new memories hit me, and it’s just really been weighing on me. You didn’t deserve any of that.”

“I agree. Now will you leave?”

He scoffs. “You could make this easier on me, you know? You think it’s easy to humble myself this way after you’ve spent the day around other males, and you come stumbling in here late, smelling of them? This is exactly what I’m talking about.”

“Don’t you ever just get tired of spinning bullshit? Ivan, you’re in your late forties. You mated me against my will, took everything from me, ruined my fucking life, and still can’t seem to take any accountability. You’ve taught me I’m only worth the money I can make you. Well since I no longer work for you, I guess I’m worthless to you, so just do me a favor and walk out. Don’t even bother looking back.”

It feels so good to finally be able to say those words, but there’s a part of me that’s still terrified of the repercussions. I know legally he can’t do anything to me since he’s been violating the contract he had me stuck in for years, but he’s conditioned me to expect the worst.

I don’t feel the kick to my ribs until he’s collapsing back onto my bed and crying, sobbing about how I always make him out to be the bad guy.

The crunch of my rib is still reverberating in my ear, the thud of something snapping piercing my side in pain as I cry out and hold my side.

“You’re going to come with me, okay? I don’t like hurting you, Lark, but you make it so damn hard sometimes to stay sane. What is it about you that just pushes all my buttons?”

I manage to choke out a ‘fuck you’ as I shake my head and try to reach for the door handle, but of course he’s quicker.

Ivan squats down beside me, gripping something in his hand that I can’t quite see. “Nothing else needs to happen here, okay? If you just cooperate, it will be so much easier. We messed up the first time, but I want a do-over. I know we can do better by you. I just want a chance. If you can’t come with me peacefully, then I’m going to have to dose you with this, and it will force a heat into you. You know we’re the only ones you can tolerate when you’re in heat. We just need to get another pup on you, and everything will be okay. I know you’re older now, but I’ve been doing research, and plenty of shifters have pups at your age. So, what’s it going to be? Can you come with me, or are we doing this the hard way?”

With that one well-placed kick, I’m right back to being his pretty little tamed wolf. My head hangs in supplication, and the fight drains right out of me.

“You need to change. You’re not getting in my fucking car or going anywhere with me wearing another male’s clothing.”

He starts digging through my meager supply of non-work clothing as I try to sit up, every tiny jostle sending shards of pain through my body, tears openly flowing from my eyes as I cry silently like they’ve taught me to.

I let him dress me like I’m a doll, grateful he doesn’t linger on the naked body underneath, and I watch him take the clothes that the triplets loaned me and throw them out my tiny window, immediately mourning the amount of comfort they brought me.

“Do you need me to carry you?”

I shake my head no, because I’ve learned too many times that doing things on my own always makes them happier. I’m in too much pain now to fight, and as he leads me down the hall, pretending to escort me, I pray we come across somebody that can slow him down, while simultaneously praying we don’t because I know that will implicate anybody else and he’ll just snatch me and run anyway.

I can’t do much of anything when I’m hurt like this, and he knows that. It’s why he did it. He likes me docile.

If I were to hit the emergency button they’ve got mounted outside, he’d snatch me up and bolt before anyone could get there, and then I’d just be in bigger trouble with him, so I just resign myself to my fate.

The drive back is fucking awful, every bump jostling the injury and making me very nearly black out in pain, but I fight through it.

“I don’t know why you thought you could replace us, Lark. You had to know that we would never allow that.”

“Why, Ivan? Why can’t I just be happy for once? You don’t want me, not really. What if somebody else wants me? Do you really hate me so much?” The effort it takes to get the words out is excruciating, so I’m gasping and slouched over by the time I’m done, sweat trickling down my temple from the effort.

“They don’t want you, Lark. They saw a beautiful woman dancing for them and fell under your spell. Give it a weekend and they’ll forget all about you, I guarantee it. I watched the footage from the club after we realized one of them sprung you out; it’s kind of pathetic how easily you believed them. They’re going to be the alphas. What use do they have for a used-up woman almost fifteen years their senior? It literally doesn’t make any sense. You should see how beautiful their fated was; you can’t even compete.”

I allow these words to hit their targets, internalizing the pain as all the self-doubt rises within me, drowning out all the helpful voices telling me I’m good and deserve good things. He’s right. The Storm Pack wanting me doesn’t really make sense. And with Ivan and Trevor in the picture especially, I could never allow that energy anywhere near their sweet little baby.

“Don’t you think it’s better for everyone if we all just keep things the way they are?”

I give him a nodded yes, because I know that’s what he wants, and he hums to himself as he navigates to their home.

It’s never really been mine, but it’s familiar at least. I know where everything is and what the rules are, so I can sort of relax into my shitty role there.

Because his favorite activity is fucking with my head, when we park, Ivan is out of his side and at mine immediately, opening my door and helping me down with all the care he apparently has saved for this one moment.

“You okay?”

I glare at him, because, no, I’m fucking not. “You fucking kicked me in the rib and broke it. What do you think?”

“Let’s get you inside so you can rest. You’ll heal before you know it.”

“You do realize my wolf is fucking barely there, right? I heal at nearly a human speed.”

He trips, looking at me in a panic. “What?”

“Do you have any idea how things work for rejected wolves? No. Of course you don’t. Why would you? You’re the rejector here, you get to live like a king.”

“Why the fuck you running lip?”

Awesome. Trevor. Yay.

“She’s hurt. I pissed her off, okay? Just be nice for a bit. Help me get her situated.”

“Mom?” Camden asks as soon as we’re through the threshold.

“Hey, baby.” I try to muster a smile, but I don’t think it’s too convincing.

“What happened? What did they do to you?”

“She has a broken rib,” Ivan says, clearly insinuating that it was the alpha heirs’ fault, not his own. “She’ll be okay, she just needs to take it easy for a bit.”

Camden rushes over, fluffing up a throw pillow on the couch and getting a blanket for me. “I’m going to fucking kill them,” he spits.

The look Ivan and Trevor give me tells me all I need to know; I can’t tell Camden fucking anything. “It was an accident, Cam. I’ll be fine. They were kind.”

He doesn’t look like he thinks they’re kind though, he looks like he wants to go try and kick their asses. I love my son, but he does not have the sort of build that those guys have. “Don’t do anything rash, Cam. This really wasn’t their fault.”

“Good thing I was there when I was to help her home,” Ivan says. “We have something to tell you, Camden. Your mother and I talked a bit, and we’re going to try again. We know it’s always bothered you that we didn’t have a good relationship, so we’re going to work on it, okay? I know you’re all grown up and forming your own pack, but I think this will be good for all of us. Who knows, maybe you’ll get a little sister sometime, too.”

Camden’s whole face lights up, as if all the shit we’ve been through hasn’t happened. A sibling is the one thing I’ve never been able to give him that he’s always desperately wanted because I knew I couldn’t stand to go through another pregnancy as long as Ivan and Trevor were the ones stuffing me with their fucking awful sperm. “We’re still talking about it,” I say, trying to temper the enthusiasm. “I need some time to think. It’s been a long day; can I please sleep?”

“Of course, mom. I’ll get you some water in case you get thirsty.”

When Camden’s out of ear shot, Trevor leans over me, almost looking normal. “You’d consider having another one with us? Really?”

Oh my gods, how fucking daft are all these men? I hate how they make me feel like I’m living in this alternate reality, where nothing is the way it actually is in my head for anyone else. “I definitely didn’t agree to that. But I really am not sure how much say you’ll give me in the matter. I’m sure raping me isn’t below you.”

“It’s not rape when you’re mated,” Trevor says too easily.

“First of all, yes, it is, second of all, did you forget you rejected me? We’re not mated.”

“Guess we know what we need to do then,” Ivan says, calculatingly. He pulls the syringe out of his pocket that I was hoping had fallen into a trash can, and while Trevor grabs my arms, he stabs it into my thigh. “We can just bite you again. That should re-ignite the link. This is our second chance, Lark. Everything’s going to be better this time.”