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The moment I stepped into the house, though, the door to the salon flew open and my aunt appeared in the doorway. ‘There she is!’ She exclaimed, a triumphant smile on her face. ‘And just in time. Lilly, my dear, I have a wonderful surprise for you!’
Oh-oh. That didn’t sound good.
‘What surprise?’ I yawned, and blinked furiously to keep my eyes open.
‘Look who has come to visit you,’ my aunt replied smiling, and waved invitingly to somebody in the room. Footsteps could be heard, and then, directly beside my aunt’s triumphant visage, appeared the arrogantly smiling face of Lieutenant Ellingham.
He bowed.
‘Miss Linton. How delighted I am to see you again.’
I straightened, and my eyes narrowed. His arrogant smile widened.
Delighted, eh? We’ll see whether you still feel like that in five minutes, Mister…
‘… killed every last one of the savages with my own hands. They were fearsome enemies, but my superior fighting skills struck fear into their hearts which they could not overcome.’
Lieutenant Ellingham thumped his chest theatrically.
‘At last, only the big grey beast was left, and so I charged forward and stuck my sabre right into its belly! It collapsed dead on the spot!’
The lieutenant finished his narration with a flourish of the arm, simulating a sabre thrust.
‘Marvellous! Simply marvellous!’ My aunt, Maria, Anne and Lisbeth applauded enthusiastically, and even Ella moved her hands together a bit, though by no means so forcefully that it could actually be heard.
‘What an impeccable display of courage,’ Anne proclaimed, fluttering her eyelashes at the lieutenant. ‘To think that you all alone went up against a raiding party of twenty-one savages, and charged such a terrifying monster as an elephant! This is the kind of bravery that made the British Empire what it is today!’
‘Yes, really amazing,’ I yawned.
The lieutenant raised an eyebrow. ‘Praise from you, Miss Linton? That is a rare gift indeed. Thank you very much. I am delighted to hear you appreciate my bravery in the face of danger.’
I had to work hard to keep a smirk off my face. ‘That’s not really what I was talking about. I think it’s amazing that you’re sitting here alive.’
‘That is due to his bravery,’ Maria pointed out, which the lieutenant acknowledged with a graceful bow of the head.
‘More to a miracle,’ I disagreed. ‘You stabbed the elephant into its belly? From below?’
‘Yes?’ The lieutenant’s voice was suddenly cautious. I had to say that up to this point the conversation had rather bored me. But now I was enjoying myself.
‘You see, that’s what I find so amazing,’ I mused. ‘The elephant collapsed, and you were standing right underneath. Yet you are sitting here alive on our couch and are not flattened to some part of the Indian soil as lieutenant-pancake.’
‘Err… well… the elephant fell to the side?’
‘To the side?’ I asked sweetly. ‘Onto the savages that you were still busy fighting off?’
‘Yes.’
‘The ones you said you had already killed before the elephant attacked?’
‘Err…’
‘Be silent, child,’ my aunt chided me. Then, turning to Lieutenant Ellingham, she continued: ‘You must excuse my niece, Sir. She has led a very sheltered life and knows little of the ways of the world. Certainly she is totally inexperienced in such manly activities as you have described.’
He nodded graciously. ‘That is no problem, Madam. Maybe,’ he said, throwing a suggestive glance in my direction, ‘I could show her a few manly activities. Then she would not be so ignorant anymore.’
I thought I was going to be sick.
‘Which brings me to the point of my visit,’ Lieutenant Ellingham continued, rising and extending his hand to me. ‘Which is to enquire whether Miss Lillian Linton would wish to go for a walk with me. There is a beautiful park outside your house, and I am sure there are some things she has not seen there before.’
There were various possible answers to that:
Oh yes, of course there are things I haven’t seen yet in the park. I’ve only lived here for over a decade of my life.
Or:
Hey, you can talk to me directly, you know! I’m right here in the room.
Or better yet:
Go for a walk with you? I’d rather go for a walk with a drunken French sailor!
But then I saw my aunt’s face over the lieutenant’s shoulder and decided on the more diplomatic:
‘Um… I don't know. I think I know my way around the park pretty well already. But thanks for the offer.’
‘That is no matter,’ he said, waving my answer away. ‘It is not the park I wished to see when coming here, but you. It is not the lush green trees I wish to enjoy, but your company, Miss Linton.’
Ugh! So much for diplomacy!
He extended his hand farther. Over his shoulder my aunt glared at me, promising death and destruction if I made the wrong choice now. Wasn’t there any way to get out of this?
Then I thought: Come on, it’s only a walk. It’s not like he’s asking you to marry him. Well, not yet anyway. What harm can a walk do?
Preferring not to think about the answer to that question, I took his hand and faked as believable a smile as possible.
‘I would be delighted to take a walk through the park,’ I told him, neglecting to mention that the same wasn’t true for having him along as company.
He took my hand. It felt moist and alien. Holding it was a repellent feeling, like having a bug crawl up your arm. But I smiled bravely as I let him lead me out of the room. At least this would keep my aunt happy.
As we left the room, I couldn’t help a thought shooting through my head: how very, very different this hand felt from that of Mr Rikkard Ambrose.
‘…and I was standing there, you see? Two hundred feet away from the Indian, and even farther away from the young lady he was running towards, knife in hand. I knew I couldn’t reach him or her in time. Yet I also knew that I was a crack shot.’
Personally, I would have called him a crackpot rather than crack shot.
I was walking beside Lieutenant Ellingham through Green Park. His promise to show me new spots in the park was long forgotten. He was far too busy entertaining me with stories of his supposed adventures in India. So far, he had killed about three hundred seventy-nine so-called ‘savages,’ thirteen elephants, five lions and one giraffe. Quietly I wondered whether he actually thought me stupid enough to believe above one word in ten.