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“No.” Even if she was the one that pointed out the flaws, it was because they couldn't prove their ideas that I spoke out, so I'm telling the truth. “It has nothing to do with her. I never told her about the incident.”

She raises her brows. “Are you sure?”

“Yes!”

She sucks in a sharp breath. “I'm sorry. I'm just a bit concerned. I just… I don't understand why you would lash out at the professors. Did you not believe Godusa made those dreamscreechers evil?” The gloss in her eyes seems to intensify, as if she would start to cry if I said the wrong answer.

“No, it's not that,” I murmur, putting a hand to her arm. “It's just that… they didn't use any concrete evidence-”

“They shouldn't need to,” Her voice gains firmness. I flinch back at the tone. “You know the truth. You know why Godusa made those creatures. You know what they've done to me and all the Amarians. Why do you need evidence?”

I narrow my eyes. How come evidence seems to be so offensive to ask for? “I’m not saying it isn't true, I just think there should be real evidence to prove what they’re saying.”

She scowls. “Is my word not enough?”

My heart shrivels up in immediate guilt. “It's not that! I just… I just want to know how they've come to their scientific conclusions.”

She takes a deep breath, seemingly relaxing her shoulders. “I’m sorry Lily Flower. I just… I just don't want you to end up brainwashed. This is how Lydia started falling for the Great Beast. She started to lose reality, and question things we already know are true.”

“But I'm not falling in love with a dreamscreecher.” Even then, is it still so wrong to question things? “I just want-”

“But this is just how it starts. Then you get a dreamscreecher to take advantage of your delusions and hurt you.”

I glance away. Our situations are nothing alike. I haven't been manipulated or assaulted. I'm questioning things with a clear mind. The dreamscreecher I've met hasn't even talked to me.

“I always want you to keep our people in mind and help protect them.” She shakes her head. “When you talked about making that wish, I thought it was a sign that you understood.” Her eyes continue to water as she stares off distantly

Guilt makes my body hunch. “I do want to help our people. I just hoped…” I take a deep breath. I don't want to say something that will freak her out. “You don't think there could've been a chance it was a misunderstanding?”

Grandmother makes eye contact with me and chuckles.

The tone of her chuckle is anything but happy.

“That’s a sweet fantasy, Amias, but I wouldn't have done what I have if there was a chance of a misunderstanding. Godusa had plenty of chances to prove that it was, but she used her creatures to destroy us instead.”

I nod as I think over the information. I can understand why she feels the way she does, from all the violence she's witnessed and the Great Beast’s assault and manipulation of Lydia. Of course she would be upset if I tried to defend them.

But she hasn’t seen what I've seen. She hasn't seen the dreamscreecher that saved my life three times now. She had never debated the topic with anyone outside of the kingdom besides Godusa. All of these reasons are why I can't make that wish to kill them all.

Even though it will upset her.

“Okay…” I murmur, just to reassure her.

“Now Amias. I want you to show me that you'll always protect our kingdom. Make that wish for your kingdom. For your family.” She puts her hands on both of my cheeks, making me look straight into dark blue eyes.

A small tear falls from one. “Everyone would be free from those monsters and no one else would have to suffer anymore.”

She pulls me in for an embrace, stroking my head like a child once again. My gaze drags to the floor. What would she do when I go against her? Would she ever understand? “Out of curiosity,” I whisper, pulling away from her. “What if I don't? Would you cleanse me?”

Grandmother smiles softly. “I wouldn't cleanse you without your permission. I've made that promise. It's only for Amarians that need it.” She disappointedly bows her head. “But everyone would continue to suffer. They would be disappointed. It would be like seeing Lydia all over again.”

I give her a curt nod though it hurts to do so; to pretend like I'm okay with this. It would be so much easier to stick to my original plan and go back to being ignorant of the truth. Just to be like anyone else in this kingdom and fit in the mold sounds like a dream.

What if I just…

I imagine myself going along with the original wish.

It would be considered a redemption for many.

The rumors about me and dreamscreechers would die.

My people would celebrate me. I can hear their chants.

I can feel Grandmother's proud embrace, as well as my entire family's.

The attacks would stop and I could carry on, finally accepted by the kingdom.

My gaze shifts to the Tenebris flowers, glaring back at me like a lethal reminder of what I was going to do.

My heart throbs. I can't. It's not right. That dreamscreecher that saved my life… they would suffer too. Even if not poisoned, their supposed loved ones would suffer too. I couldn't forgive myself if I betrayed them now.

But how would Grandmother react to that?

“I understand, Grandmother.” I whisper.

“Good,” Grandmother nods. “On another note, you should invite Clara to your birthday party. Bring her to the family.”

“Oh well she…” I shake my head, finding it hard to move on from the dreamscreecher subject. “She's been too nervous to meet you guys.”

“I insist,” she giggles. “ If it has any chance of working out…surely she will want to come.”

“ Well…” I slowly start but I suppress an answer. I guess if she won't meet my family, that's my answer to if it will work out.

“I mean, do you know if she feels the same?” Grandmother perks a brow. “You know I don't want you chasing after women who don't feel the same.”

“I know. She won't end up like Grandfather.”

She sharply inhales. “Just… be careful. I wouldn't want your ambition for love to get in the way.”

“I know.”

“Well if she does come…” Grandmother glances around. “Let me know. I want to meet her.”

A smile slowly forms upon my lips. She could be the right one, if she's able to overcome meeting my family. Maybe then we could be together and live as soulmates would. I would have everything I wanted if she came and the wish works.

We’ll just have to wait and see.