Page 11

The kiss from yesterday at the folly still haunted him, and because of that, Edward made certain he wasn’t available to most members of the house party for the bulk of the day.

To be fair, there were a few things regarding his ledgers he needed to go over, for his man of affairs was due to visit soon and he wished to be prepared, but he also wanted time alone to think over what exactly he wanted from Nancy or to be to her.

God, why has this woman managed to tie my insides into knots once again?

He planted his elbows on his desktop in the study then buried his head in his hands.

Did it make him a fool if he wanted to spend more time in her company?

Outside of her rejecting him thirteen years ago, he suspected that she had broken his heart even if he hadn’t realized it.

Was he in love with her back then? It was still difficult to tell, but his heart had never felt the same after that embarrassing and disappointing summer night.

Eventually, Reggie came to seek him out.

“What the devil are you doing hiding in here? You are the host of this event, and your guests would like to see you.”

Edward blew out a breath. “Do shut up, Reg.”

“Well, someone is quite grumpy today, and that begs the question of why.” Without being invited, the man came into the room and then threw himself into the same leather chair he occupied a couple of days ago.

“If it was anyone else, I’d say there was a woman involved, but since it’s you, that is quite impossible. ”

“You assume I am either unwilling or unable to find a match at the house party.” It wasn’t a question, for there was no use dissembling. They had known each other for a long time.

“Aren’t you?” Reg leaned forward. He rested his forearms on his knees and let his hands dangle between. When Edward didn’t immediately answer, he huffed. “Your silence means you have, indeed, found someone but you are uncertain about your reception.”

“Why do I even talk to you?” For long moments, he regarded his best friend. “In many ways, though, it’s a good thing. Perhaps you can help me make sense of things.”

Reggie nodded. “I’m happy to help.”

After rubbing a hand along the side of his face, Edward blew out another breath. At this point, he was beginning to sound like a windstorm. “Have you met Lady Havelock?”

“The pretty blonde widow who is past the second bloom of youth but still quite attractive?”

A pox on the man for even noticing! But he tamped his rising anger. “Yes. Nancy was the woman I proposed to thirteen years ago on the advice of my father and hers.”

“And she rejected you out of hand.”

“Yes.” He’d told Reg the story a few times before. “At the time, I had accepted that.”

The other man snorted. “Barely.”

He continued as if he wasn’t interrupted.

“I went about my life, taking a mistress here and there, but I’d always guarded my heart, because deep down, I think she broke it.

” As Reg gawked at him, Edward nodded. “Over the years, I have pondered my inability or unwillingness to connect with a woman on any sort of level that wasn’t shallow.

I still can’t shake the feeling of regret that rejection caused, the regret that I should have pushed for the union.

” He met his friend’s gaze. “I have been unable to forget those feelings.”

For the space of a few heartbeats, his best friend remained silent. Finally, he nodded. “Are you telling me that you have been in love with Lady Havelock for years?” That bit of incredulity in his voice brought Edward back to center.

“Not exactly. I am telling you that I hold her in high esteem, and that those feelings could definitely grow into love if given a chance.” It was an impossible position, for she certainly didn’t want a new relationship let alone a second marriage.

Not that is where this would end. “What should I do?”

Reggie surged to his feet in favor of pacing about the small space. “Well… have you kissed her?”

“Barely.” Heat rose up the back of his neck as he once more remembered what had transpired between him and Nancy at the old folly.

“Yesterday. During the greenery gathering party. In the folly.” He shrugged when Reggie’s dark eyebrows soared in surprise.

“It was more of an introduction than anything else.”

“Hmm, I’d wondered where you’d slipped off to and figured you didn’t wish to be around any of us.” He shoved a hand through his hair. “Did the lady slap you?”

“No.”

“Ah.” Reg continued to pace. “Did she kiss you back?”

“Also no, but she acted as if she enjoyed it, for she curled the fingers of one hand into the lapel of my greatcoat.” As he spoke, Edward put a hand over that part of his chest, almost as if he could still feel the pressure of her hand there.

“Then you should pursue her.”

“Why? She has already rejected me once. I’m not certain I can survive it a second time.”

“Just this.” Reg perched once more on his chair.

“Because you have never shown any sort of interest in a woman like this for years. Usually, you’ll drink too much, bring a woman into your bed, tell me you have a new mistress, and before I can grow accustomed to that, a few months pass and then you’ve let her go. ”

Slowly, Edward nodded. “Nancy is… different. She deserves more than such disrespect. Hell, I deserve more than shallow connections.”

That was a rather large admission for him, and he gasped from the truth of it.

Reg stared with his lower jaw slightly ajar.

“Uh…” Then he cleared his throat. “I remember you talking about her, remembered that she married in haste six months after she’d turned you down.

” Surprise threaded through his voice. “That was when you began taking mistresses… as a way to hide how you truly felt. Now everything is beginning to make sense.”

“There is nothing—”

“And why you spoke so negatively regarding marriage, and to my wanting to court Kitty. Your views were colored by that one moment, that one woman, and I had no idea.” He stared at Edward. “Lady Havelock is still quite a handsome woman.”

“She is.”

“And she’s a widow.”

“True.”

“This gives her a fair amount of freedom over the innocent ladies here.”

“It does.” Knots of worry pulled in his belly.

A grin curved Reggie’s lips. “Then chase her. Find out if she has feelings for you. And besides, it’s the holiday season.”

Edward scoffed. “What does the time of year have to do with anything?”

“Everything!” If possible, Reg’s already broad grin widened. “It makes a romance that much deeper.” He waggled his eyebrows. “Take her on a sleigh ride. Alone.”

“And do what?” Was he truly this horrible at romancing a woman?

“Enjoy the scenery? Burrow under a blanket with her? Talk to her? Kiss her? Use your imagination, man! It’s not that difficult.”

Apparently, it is. The heat on his neck intensified. “What did you, uh, do to woo Kitty?” Did he even want to know?

“Whatever she wanted.” Reg planted his hands on his knees.

“I went along with her schemes, did everything she suggested. Once, we raced horses across a field, merely so I could have a chance to kiss her.” When Edward sputtered, he held up a hand.

“Calm yourself, Armestead. We are married now. But in your case, the trick is to show interest in Lady Havelock’s interests.

Make yourself available. Or better yet, show yourself as vulnerable to her. ”

He frowned. “Why? That is against everything I have ever been taught.”

“Perhaps that is the problem. Dare to be a different man, Edward.” The other man nodded. “Trust me. It will help. Just be the man you have always wished that you were.”

“A different man, a different time, for a woman who is different due to a horrid marriage.”

“Exactly.” Reg winked. “Don’t meet her as the earl or a man with responsibilities to a title. Meet her as a man who is interested in her as a woman. Good luck, and make certain you tell me all the details.”

Edward snorted but a grudging grin snaked across his face. “Why, so you can tell Kitty?”

“Oh, she’ll have the details anyway, but this is strictly for me. So I can tease you once you fall hopelessly in love and know that exquisite torture.”

“I’ll say it again, Reg. Do shut up.”

With very little effort, later in the afternoon, Edward was able to entice Nancy to accompany him on a sleigh ride around his property. A light snow was falling, and even though there were two other sleighs out at the same time with other parties, he felt the most comfortable with her.

As the vehicle started off and the bells on the horse’s harness set up a faint jingle, Edward relaxed into the squabbed bench. “Thank you for agreeing to the ride. It’s one of the few pleasures I have here at the hall.”

“And you wished to share it with me?” Surprise threaded through her inquiry even as her lips curved slightly with a grin. “I must admit, I’m beginning to be quite partial to this sort of transportation.”

“Ah, good. Then I made the right choice.” As his nerves felt strung all too tight, he wondered why he suddenly was so nervous. “I thought that you might enjoy seeing the whole of the property. There are some beautiful vistas, especially when the sun is actually shining.”

“It’s lovely already and look how the sun sparkles on the snow like a million diamonds.”

“Yes, it is quite the lovely sight.” Except he wasn’t looking at the landscape. Instead, the whole of Edward’s attention was on his companion.

For this afternoon’s outing, Nancy wore a gown of moss green. An ivory brocade pelisse was over that, with a straw bonnet that had been decorated with green ribbons. A rabbit fur muff kept her hands hidden. Already, her cheeks and the tip of her nose were pink from the cold.

Beside him, she shivered. “You have quite an expansive estate. It must be horribly time-consuming to keep it running.”