Page 46 of Silver Linings

twenty-seven

. . .

“No, we absolutely cannot put War and Peace next to an alien romance titled War and Tease .”

I came to the bookstore during my lunch break to bring Silver lunch, almost positive she hasn’t eaten today, but it would seem I have entered into the middle of a duel of literary proportions.

It’s the day before the re-opening, and emotions are high.

Silver is visibly stressed, even if she acts like everything is fine.

“Why not?” Carmen huffs.

“Well, for starters, they’re different genres,” Silver volleys back, throwing her hands up.

“That sounds like discrimination, boss lady. Maybe the person who’s buying Tolstoy is going through something, and they look over and see a seven foot tall alien with a ten pack of abs next to it and think, you know what— this is what’s going to fix me.”

Silver has gone silent, but I can see a subtle twitch in her left eye and decide now is the best time to intervene.

“I think Tolstoy would prefer being shelved next to the minotaur smut.” I step into their line of sight, making my presence known, and something in Silver’s pale eyes softens before crinkling at the corners with humor.

“What do you know?” She challenges.

“Lots of things. I’ve been catching up on my reading since book club. Wouldn’t want to fall behind or be caught unaware…again.” I sidle up next to her, leaning down and brushing a kiss against her temple.

“See! Even Hendrix agrees with me.”

Silver turns to me. “No more sex for you if you take her side.”

“Hey! That’s sexual coercion.” Carmen settles her hands on her hips, shaking her head. “You are out of control today.”

She steps away, probably to go shelve the two books together anyway, when Silver turns to me. “What are you doing here? Shouldn’t you be at work?”

I hold up the lunch I picked up on my way over. “I’m on lunch, and now, so are you.”

She looks from me to the bag, contemplating. “I don’t have time.”

“Ten minutes. That’s all I’m asking, and then you can go right back to checking things off your sticky notes.” I wave the bag of take out under her nose, and she sways on her feet to chase after the smell.

“How do you know I have sticky notes?”

“Because they’ve been littered throughout the store for weeks. I found one in my shoe the other day. Don’t forget to follow up with the graphic designer doing the website.”

She grabs a fresh sheet and scribbles the reminder down.

“Sit with me, eat some food. Carmen can handle things while you’re resting.”

She still looks uncertain, but the smell of the double cheeseburger with fried onions wafting from the bag has her waffling on her decision.

“Or I can pick up whatever task you need done while you sit down and have lunch,” I offer.

“No,” she says quickly. “Sit with me.”

A few moments later, we find ourselves sitting on the small bench under the shop window, watching people pass by while Silver demolishes the food I brought her.

She allowed the business one day to close and get the store ready with final touches for tomorrow, and plenty of people walking past are checking out the commotion, wondering why the windows are suddenly papered shut.

Every time they do, Silver invites them to the event tomorrow as I sit back, bursting with pride.

After the last person walks off, she shoves a couple fries into her mouth and turns to see me smiling at her.

“What?” she says around a mouthful of potato.

“Nothing. It’s just cute how excited you get telling people.”

“Well, I have to. This place needs to be a success.”

“I don’t think that’s it.” She raises an eyebrow at me. “I’m sure that’s part of it, but I think there’s a much bigger piece of you that wants it for you too, to prove to yourself you could stick to something.”

“Maybe.” She looks down at her lap.

I worry I’ve said the wrong thing, or that maybe I’ve pushed her too far into her thoughts. She takes the final bite of her burger and comes to stand, scrunching the wrapper in her hands.

“Sunshine, I?—”

She cuts me off. “It’s fine. I need to get back though.” She leans down, and I rest my hands on the backs of her thighs as she places a soft kiss on my lips. “Thank you for lunch,” she mumbles against my mouth.

“I’ll come back after work.”

“ You have done enough for this place.” She runs her hands through the hair at the nape of my neck.

“The girls and I are gonna be here late getting everything ready, and then I’m going to try and sleep so I can be rested for the long day ahead.

Something tells me if you’re around, I won’t be resting. ”

The smile I give her is wolfish. “I’ll see you in the morning then.”

As much as it pains me to give her the space, it’s obvious she’s feeling overwhelmed. Even with as far as we’ve made it in terms of being open with each other, she’s leaning on old habits right now, feeling like she needs to do this part alone.

She turns to walk back into the store, but I grab her wrist, spinning her around and bringing my mouth down on top of hers.

Instantly, her body melts into mine, and the rest of the world fades away for a moment in time.

When I pull away, it’s only to look in her eyes, to infuse her with this surety that I have in her, in us.

But she keeps her eyes closed, breathing me in slowly before walking back into her shop and getting back to work.

My walk back to The Langham leaves me feeling unsettled, and when I enter the building, I immediately feel a sense of wrongness settling in the air.

I look at Tony, who has a concerned expression on his face, before seeing Mrs. Evans step out of Fairbank’s office.

The look she gives me is smug, self-congratulatory, and I know whatever is about to happen won’t be pleasant.

Mr. Fairbanks pops out of his office a moment later, fingers motioning for me to come forward. “My office. Now.”

This could really only be about one thing, and it’s time to face the consequences of my inevitable choice—there was no choice, falling in love with Silver was inevitable.

I trail into his office after him and wait for him to speak.

“Do you know why I’ve called you in here?”

“To chat about the latest episode of The Real Housewives?” He does seem the type.

“No,” he sputters and straightens the lapels of his jacket. “It has been brought to my attention that you have breached the terms of your employment.”

“Ah.”

He’s taken aback by my unruffled demeanor. “I’ve been informed by a concerned tenant that you have been cavorting with a resident of the building. Do you deny engaging in an inappropriate relationship?” I don’t think he wants to know just how inappropriate I’ve been.

“I don’t,” I say plainly.

I don’t think he heard my admission, as his gaze flicks to the lobby, and I know he’s thinking about Mrs. Evans.

“There has been talk of you being too friendly with Ms. James, and even claims that someone with your features was seen leaving the building well before any scheduled shift you may have had.”

“I understand.”

“The same concerned tenant claims to have seen you around town with Ms. James, and at this point, there have been too many instances for me to ignore such brazen disregard for the rules.”

They could have seen us anywhere—at Get Nailed while getting supplies for the shop, at that Italian restaurant off Cornelia Street, on a walk around Central Park to see the leaves change as she showed me some of her favorites bench plaques. The fact that we were being watched makes my skin crawl.

“I’m afraid I must relieve you of your position.” His dismissal pulls me out of my thoughts.

I should feel panic at his words. A few months ago, I certainly would have, but instead, I feel a strange sort of calm settle over me.

This was never supposed to be what I’d do forever.

It was a means to an end, even if that end was nowhere on the horizon.

The end of this job no longer feels like an end to New York like it had when I’d first arrived from Seattle.

No, this is my home. I can feel it deep in my core.

I felt that way when I was here in my early twenties, and I can still feel it now.

It was always going to be this city. It was always going to be Silver.

Home was here before her. Home is here with her.

I was always meant to end up in this very place, tool bag in hand, knocking on the door of the woman who would flip me inside out, and help me become the version of myself that I liked.

I could feel in my bones that I would have found my way to her even if I hadn’t left after college.

I don’t know who we would’ve been back then, but I still would have been hers, in every version of this life.

“Do you have nothing to say for yourself?” My former boss pulls me out of my thoughts.

“No, sir. The termination is fair, if not unavoidable.” He’s at a loss for words. “I’ll grab my few things and be on my way. Thank you for the opportunity—it gave me a second chance with the woman of my dreams.”

Fairbanks doesn’t know I met and fumbled my first chance encounter with Silver that very first day the world tipped on its axis, pitching us toward each other and spinning my plans out of control. The fact that she lives here and awarded me a do-over was pure fate.

“I’m sure I’ll be seeing you around because, well, because my girlfriend lives here.” Fuck, that feels good to say out loud. I reach my hand out to shake his, and he reluctantly grips mine back. “I hope it won’t be awkward.” Giving his hand one final shake, I make my way out of his office.

I quickly gather the few things I had in my office storeroom, shoving my sketchbook of designs, the one specifically housing the mock ups for Kena’s hutch, into the bag of clothes I stored there for a quick change.

I walk through the lobby, Tony giving me a salute, but I laugh and pull him into a hug. “I’ll see you soon Tony.”

Mrs. Evans is lurking in the corner. “I warned you to stay away from that girl. I told you I would make you sorry.”

I face her head on. “I’m not. Sorry, that is.”

She scoffs derisively in my direction. “I tried to warn you. She’s a tramp, nothing but trouble. You’re just one of many?—”

I bridge the few feet standing between us, and she yields a step.

“If you can’t see her for what and who she is, then I feel bad for you.

But you don’t deserve her. Hell, I probably don’t either.

But the difference is, I get to try every day, and you’ll be here, trying to make everyone around you miserable when the only person you’re hurting is yourself, Joyce.

I would wish you peace, but quite frankly, I hope you stub your toe on the corner of your bed every day for the way you’ve treated her.

” Mrs. Evans goes to argue, and I can sense Tony to our right trying not to laugh.

“But I’ll see you soon. I suggest you be nicer the next time you see my girl, or I might have to let Fairbanks know about that stolen—what was it again, Tony? ”

“Scotch.” Mirth lines his answer.

“Ah, yes. Scotch.”

I don’t wait for a response before I step out of the building into the crisp mid-November air and head towards my apartment.

I want to go back to the store and help, but I know Silver will question why I’m there, not at work.

I don’t want to tell her I lost my job the night before the biggest day of her life.

She doesn’t need that distraction right now.

I spend the rest of my free afternoon finishing up the sketches I have for Kena before shooting some pictures over to the number he gave me. The money I make from this one project will help to sustain me for at least a month, so I want to make sure I get it right for him.

The rest of the night slogs by while I do the most menial tasks to stay busy, wishing I was at the bookstore. I debate shooting Silver a quick text to check in, make sure she and the girls don’t need anything, but decide against it, not wanting to distract her.

I do a quick home workout to pass the rest of the evening, shower, then hop in bed so I can be up early tomorrow to pick up coffee and breakfast for everyone.

Before I know it, sleep takes me under, and I fall into a dream about a beautiful girl with hair the color of the moon and eyes as bright as the sea.

I shoot out of bed to a loud trilling that abruptly stops.

Reaching over and grabbing my phone, I note two things. First, it’s three in the morning, and second, there are two missed calls from my mom.

That can’t be right.

The ringing picks up again, the bright light and shrill sound splitting my head in two.

“Mom?” My voice is hoarse with sleep as I answer the phone.

Sobbing runs through the line and straight to my heart, waking me up faster than a bucket of cold water over my head.

“What’s wrong? Are you okay?”

“It’s—” Sobs wrack her body, making it impossible for her to speak. “It’s Laurel, sweetie.”

My heart stops cold in my chest.

“She’s in the hospital.” I can’t feel my toes . “She was in an accident. It’s bad, the doctor said… Hen, please get here.”

All the trauma from losing my brother comes rushing to the surface like a tidal wave, drowning out everything and crushing me with terror. My body goes completely numb, and my mind drains, painfully blank.

“I’m coming,” I say before she tells me the hospital and we hang up.

Panic starts to claw its way up my throat, choking me on all my regrets.

I left on bad terms. I’ve barely spoken to her or the rest of my family since I left.

What kind of brother does that? What if she dies, and I never get to tell her I love her again, or that she was the reason I stayed in Seattle as long as I did after Maddox died?

I would live the rest of my life in penitence.

I don’t have a single thought in my head other than my little sister lying still in a hospital bed.

That thought alone spurs me into action, scrambling for my wallet and a hoodie, not even stopping to change out of my sweatpants.

I run out the door and hail a cab to the airport, purchasing a flight on my phone before slipping the device into my pants.

I’m too distracted in my terrified state to notice when it falls back out onto the taxi seat, before throwing myself out the door and onto the first plane out to Seattle.