Page 14 of Sean's Sunshine
Sean grimaced. “Mrs. Bobby’s Mom?”
“Yeah, like, no shit. Bobby—he’s one of John’s biggest stars, and he only does a couple of scenes a year now. He does contracting work mostly—woodwork and construction. He’s real good at that, and he makes a lot of money, but sometimes he just likes the attention. He fucks like a god. His boyfriend likes to watch. It’s very weird, but it works for them. Anyway, when he started porn, it was so he could move his mom out of a bad situation. I don’t know the particulars, but there was an asshole landlord and a small town involved. All the drama. So Bobby gets his mom out of the small town, and she needs a job. And she doesn’t reallyapproveof the porn, but John’s old receptionist had quit and shit wascrazy. Bobby tells his mom that the porn guys need a receptionist, and he apparently told her that they needed a mom too.And you know what?”
“What?”
“He was right. I mean….” Billy blew out a breath. “I mean, Dex is the mom and John’s the dad at the studio—we all know that. But when you’re done with a scene, having this nice woman offer you some crackers and ask you if you need some diaper rash ointment or witch hazel without judging you or telling you you’re bad or need another job? It’s like… it’s like magic.”
Sean remembered Randy telling him how hard it was to film a scene—to go without solid food for a couple of days and then knock yourself out doing something physical and demanding, and even emotionally difficult, depending on who was doing it.
“Was she there today?” Sean asked softly.
“Yeah. She remembered I liked horchata—had a can of it in her mini fridge so I could have some sugar water before I left. It….” The look he gave Sean then was particularly naked. “I was really not looking forward to coming back here. You haven’t said anything, and I’m grateful, but you’ve got the nice mother and the solid family and… I just didn’t want to drag my whoring ass back here to make you all squeamish and shit. It’s funny how the smallest kindness gives you courage, you know?”
Sean caught his breath. “You… you don’t need to be afraid of what I think,” he said after a moment. “I’m a stupid cop. Who cares?”
Billy shrugged and swallowed. “I don’t know. I didn’t think I did. And then I stopped to get pizza, thinking you wouldn’t know what a big deal it was, but you did. And you were super patient with Randy—not everyone is. I was worried. You gavemehell, but when I got here, Randy was looking like a kid who’d just had his best day with a big brother. I would have brought you pizza for that alone. And he….” Billy shook his head like he was trying to master himself. “Ignore me. I’m always sort of a mess after a scene. I don’t usually get all squishy, but I get tired. Raw. Anyway, he left me mac and cheese and hot dogs, and it was such a nice thing. And I know that kid. He’s got a good heart, but he needs prompting. So I wake up under a blanket, with my favorite comfort food in the fridge, and I know you might have given him a little nudge. And I wanted to say thanks, you know? For not being mean to Randy, not being shitty to me. I… it was stand-up. I just wanted you to know that.”
Sean was still fumbling for an answer when Billy stood abruptly and yawned.
“And after all that, I’ve got to get to bed for real. I’ll make sure the monitor’s turned on, so you be sure to wake me up if you need anything, okay?”
Sean nodded, trying to pull in enough air to say something, anything, before Billy cleared the room.
“Billy,” he rasped, as Billy reached the doorway.
Billy paused, his head dropping, his hand clutching the molding. “Yeah?”
“Thanks for coming in and talking. It… it was nice. Feel free to do it again if you want.”
The young man straightened, his head came up, and his hand dropped from the door frame, as though the words had made him stronger. “Thanks, Kryzynski. I might take you up on that.”
“And Billy?”
This time he looked over his shoulder. “Yeah?”
“You can call me Sean, you know. I don’t have to be Kryzynski forever.”
“You know first names are dangerous,” Billy said, turning around just a little more.
“I know.”
“You still don’t get to call me Guillermo, you understand?”
Sean swallowed back the hurt but decided he could live with it. “Yeah. I get that.” Maybe after some more conversations, some more bedtime stories, that would be something he could do.
“All right, then. Night, Sean.”
“Night, Billy.”
And then he was gone down the hall, and Sean switched off the lamp.
The Trouble with Heroes
“BILLY?” SEAN’Svoice came through the baby monitor clearly at around 7:00 a.m., which was when he usually woke up needing to pee. “Can I try going by myself this time?”
“No.” It was a week after Billy’s scene, and while he had to admit Sean was healing nicely and could actually walk across the room unaided—and not get dizzy—Billy still didn’t want a repeat of their first morning.
They were already uncomfortably close as it was.