Page 47 of Scarred in Silence

Snot and tears cover my face. My wrists and ankles ache from the leather pulling. I want to die. I don’t even recognize myself. The person staring back at me in the mirror looks like a stranger.

She hums “Hallelujah” by Jeff Buckley as she does what everyone has always sought to do… Change me…

My face looks broken. There are no emotions left to be seen. My tears have run dry, and my hope has lost its fire.

She carefully places the bottle on the tray as she clasps her hands together.

“You’re going to look so perfect for him.”

Myeyebrows pinch together, my head throbs.

Behind the tape, my muffled voice screams, “For who?”

She walks out of the room, leaving me alone with my thoughts.

The tingle on my scalp reminds me I’m alive. I love pain. Pain means I’m alive. Right now, do I want to be? No, but Lucien will save me. He always does.

The smell of the chemicals makes me feel dizzy. I try to remain calm, taking in slow, deep breaths. Nothing is as it seems.

I stare into the mirror, blurring my vision.

Nothing matters.

I’ll sit here and wait for her to come back. Then I’ll do what I should have done when Lucien captured me. Run.

18

Astra

The sounds of voices have my heavy eyelids lifting. The smell of that awful perfume permeates the air. My throat burns— a familiar sting. They drugged me.

Yesterday, when it was time to rinse my hair, Nicolette said I couldn’t be awake for it. She wanted the big reveal to be a surprise.

I don’t know what the fuck they gave me, but I feel like shit. I’m sure I look even worse. I never got the chance to run.

I sit up and look around. Nicolette stands at the door with Varek. They appear to be arguing in a whispered tone.

I glance down and see that someone changed my clothes. I’m dressed in a black sleep gown. Fucking gross. My hair tickles my neck. I haven’t had my hair this short in years. Probably since I was eleven.

Nicolette turns to greet me.

“We need to get you dressed. We start in an hour.”

We start what? What the fuck is going on?

I touch my mouth and realize the duct tape is gone. It was left on for so long that I still experience phantom sensations of theduct tape lingering.

I stand on shaky legs before her.

She turns to Varek and takes the clothing from him. She holds up a black lace lingerie set.

“Put this on.” She tosses it to me.

“Excuse me?” I am seconds away from punching her, but her next words are a punch to my core.

“You need to look good for the buyers. Put it on, or we can knock you out and hold the bidding that way. You choose.”

I stare at her, overwhelmed by her words. Then I remember when she came to Varek’s house. She said I would sell for more if I didn’t look like a drug whore. Fuck.