Page 40 of Save You (Maxton Hall #2)

Lydia

For the first time in my life, I have to order a dress online.

Instead of strolling down Bond Street and wandering into each of the shops at least once, I’m sitting on Ruby’s bed, clicking from one website to another.

It’s fun, especially because I don’t have to do this on my own, but I’m still looking forward to when I’ll be able to go back to my favorite shops in person, to touch the dresses for real and see them up close.

That’s not going to be an option for the next few months though. Most of the shop owners know me, and it’s way too likely that they’d take one glance at my stomach and put two and two together. After that, it would be only a matter of time before Dad found out.

And that thought sends an ice-cold shiver through my body.

No, online shopping will have to do for the time being.

“What d’you think of that one?” Ruby asks, turning her laptop toward me.

I screw up my nose. “It looks like someone slipped with the scissors,” I say, running my index finger over the image—the hemline is a good bit higher at the front than the back.

“My mum would have been so angry at a cut like that. The color isn’t great either.

And nor is the lazy bit of lace at the neckline. ”

“OK, OK.” Ruby laughs, closing the window. “Well, let’s try here. We’re only on page twelve of twenty-seven.”

She starts scrolling down, and together we watch an array of dresses in all kinds of cuts and colors pop up on the screen.

“Maybe I should just skip the Spring Ball,” I suggest after a while.

Ruby instantly shakes her head. “It’s your last Spring Ball, Lydia. You have to come.”

“I’m starting to think it’s going to be impossible to find a dress that will hide this belly. What if someone catches on?” I ask, pointing at the little bump beneath my oversize sweatshirt.

“We’ll find a dress. Don’t you worry.” Ruby sounds a lot more confident than I feel.

Dr. Hearst has told me that I’m a lot smaller than most women expecting twins, but I feel enormous.

Over the last few weeks, I’ve got used to carrying my school bag in front of me, and my blouses are two sizes bigger now.

James snuck them home from the sewing room last time he was up at Beaufort’s for a meeting.

This is the first time that I’ve been glad our school uniform was designed by Mum and is made in our workshops.

I wish it was that easy to get hold of a ball dress. I’m already wishing I hadn’t let James and Ruby talk me into going. And the dress isn’t even my biggest problem. My main concern is avoiding Graham outside class at all costs.

But I can’t tell Ruby that—and I certainly can’t tell James.

I couldn’t bear it if he gave me even one more sympathetic glance.

Not after last Wednesday, when I got a trapped nerve in my back and was lying helpless in bed like a beetle.

The pain was so bad that I couldn’t move and had to wait for James to hear me calling for help. And then he had to help me dress .

It was humiliating, and I wish I could just wipe the whole morning from my head. Forever. So now, if I tell him that I can’t face meeting Graham at a party, he’s bound to think I’m losing it. And I’d hate that.

“What about this one?” asks Ruby.

I don’t like that dress either. It’s too young for me, not glamorous enough—it reminds me of a uniform. “What I really want is a dress where I won’t totally stand out.”

“I’d never have thought it would be this hard to find a suitable dress for A Midsummer Night’s Dream . I wish we hadn’t chosen it as the theme now.”

“It’s a gorgeous theme. And an Elie Saab dress would work perfectly for it,” I sigh.

Ruby types the name into her browser search bar and then squeals enthusiastically. “Yes, they really would be perfect. The appliqué flowers are stunning and…oh God, they cost a fortune!”

“Oh, ah, yes. But that isn’t the problem. The thing is, you have to try a dress like that on in person, and I can’t do that right now.”

Quite apart from the fact that it would be totally OTT to go to a school ball like that.

I’m saving the dream of Elie Saab for my wedding day.

Or someone else’s—all my friends will probably be married before me.

My love life now consists entirely of reading old messages from Graham and bursting into tears, as inconspicuously as possible.

It’s a fiasco.

“We could ask Ember to help,” Ruby suggests hesitantly. “She’s great at finding stuff online.” She glances cautiously at me. “We don’t need to tell her any more than she needs to know.”

“Don’t you think she’ll work it out for herself?” I ask.

“She might. Ember has a nose for secrets,” Ruby muses. “But even if she does, I hope you know that she’d never tell a soul.”

I take a deep breath. Over the last few weeks and months, Ruby has proved what a good friend she is. She might be the best friend I’ve ever had. I can’t imagine her going behind my back. And if she trusts her sister, then I can too.

“If you think Ember can solve my dress problem, then I’m very happy to ask her.”

Ruby beams. Then stands up. “When is Percy bringing James to pick you up? Do we have time?”

“Training won’t be over for another half hour,” I say after a quick glance at the clock. “So there’s no way he’ll be here before quarter past seven.”

“Perfect.” Ruby opens the door and beckons to me. I follow her onto the landing. Ember’s door is directly opposite Ruby’s and slightly ajar. Ruby knocks twice.

“Ember, do you have a minute? We’ve got a dress emergency.”

“Sure, come in,” she calls.

The two of us walk into Ember’s room. It’s the same size as Ruby’s and pretty cluttered. A bed, a desk, another narrower table with a sewing machine on it, a tailor’s dummy with a dress hanging from it…My eyes widen.

“Is that your dress?” I ask Ruby in disbelief.

I’m longing to take a closer look at it, but I remember my manners in time. “Hi, Ember,” I say with a wave.

Ruby’s sister is sitting on the floor beside her bed with rolls of fabric and assorted swatches laid out in front of her. Her hair is up in a huge messy bun and a few strands have come loose. There’s a pen between her teeth.

“Hi,” she mumbles, putting more swatches down so that she can take the pen from her mouth. “What kind of emergency?”

“Lydia needs a dress for the Spring Ball. Ideally one by Elie Saab, but that’s not an option at the moment. Do you have any ideas where we could get something to fit the theme? We’ve already tried all the websites you suggested.”

“Elie Saab would be perfect. His clothes are so gorgeous.” Ember sighs. “I’ve got loads of them on my dresses board on Pinterest.”

“Aren’t they?” I say, stepping closer to the dummy. I glance over my shoulder at Ember. “May I?”

She nods. “Sure.”

I study the dress in detail. It’s in pale rose with a tulle skirt and an embroidered floral bodice. On closer inspection, I notice that it’s in two pieces. I presume that Ember is planning to use the wide silk ribbon to join them where it’s currently pinned together.

“Did you sew this yourself?”

Ember nods.

“It’s stunning,” I say straight up.

Ember’s cheeks color a little. “We were in luck—I only really bought the tulle for fun. It’s not great quality, but nobody will be able to tell once it’s finished, unless they really know their stuff.”

Suddenly, I hear Mum’s voice in my ear.

Talent. Pure talent.

I keep thinking about her lately. In the strangest situations and the weirdest places, I suddenly see her face or hear her voice, and although it still really hurts to think about her, those moments are beautiful and reassuring too. It’s like part of Mum will always be with me.

“You’re really talented, Ember. I wish I could sew this well.”

“Don’t you learn that, growing up in a family like yours?” she asks carefully.

I shrug.

I still remember begging my parents at the age of thirteen for lessons from one of the dressmakers.

I wanted to be able to make the dresses I was designing for real, but I didn’t know how.

Dad wanted to see my sketches and designs so that he could decide whether it was worth paying someone to teach me.

But the minute he realized that I was drawing dresses for young women, he put them down with a snort.

After that, I more or less taught myself to sew.

But not even the skirts and blouses I made were enough to convince my parents that it would be worthwhile for Beaufort’s to branch out into a women’s collection.

And after a while, I found it too depressing to sit for hours at the machine, pouring blood, sweat, and tears into pieces of clothing that nobody would ever wear.

“I used to be able to sew. Now I’m…out of practice,” I answer after a while.

“How come?”

It’s kind of nice that Ember just asks straight-out. Most people are too shy, like they don’t know what’s OK to ask me. Which means we just talk about superficial stuff. Ember is a rare exception. She gives me the impression of being genuinely interested in the answers.

“I always wanted to have my own line at Beaufort’s, but my parents flat refused to consider women’s fashion. So eventually, I gave up sewing.”

Ember looks thoughtfully at me. “So you aren’t designing anymore?”

“No, I am, but…” My shoulders twitch. “Only for me, not for Beaufort’s.”

“That’s sad,” Ruby says beside me, and Ember nods. “I could say something stupid like ‘Never give up!’ but I get how down it must get you to be constantly rejected. I’d lose the will after a while of that too.”

“Yeah.” I feel the dark clouds looming inside me, ready to whirl me into a cyclone of negative thoughts that it takes me hours to escape.

Hastily, I try to take my mind off it, to think about other things.

“Never mind. Back to business! Where do you think I could get a lovely dress for the Spring Ball? Ruby says that as a blogger, you’ve got all kinds of insider tips,” I twitter.

I can hear how fake my cheerfulness sounds.

Ember studies the dummy, then turns to me. “I’ve still got loads of fabric. If you want, I could sew you a dress too.”

For a moment, I can’t speak.

Then I realize that I can’t possibly ask that much of her. I shake my head slowly. “That’s way too much work. Besides, the party’s next Saturday.”

Ember waves dismissively. “Rubbish. I wouldn’t have offered if I didn’t have time. You must have a slip from one of your old dresses, right?” she asks. “We’ll come up with something lovely. It’ll be great.”

“Take her up on it, Lydia,” Ruby insists, putting an arm around my shoulder.

I’m so overwhelmed by their generosity, friendliness, and helpfulness that my throat constricts and my eyes start to sting. I blink frantically and take deep breaths in and out. It might just be hormones, but right now, I’m finding it really hard not to let go.

“Thanks,” I mumble in the end.

“Oh, don’t thank me yet. My work comes at a price. Although it’s only a little thing…” Ember says, looking from me to Ruby with an almost fiendish smile.

I look in confusion at Ruby, who seems anything but happy.

“Ember…” she says, her voice serious.

“Oh, Ruby.” She turns to me and says, “All I want is to come to the party with you.”

“That’s a great idea! Isn’t it?” I ask Ruby, but she is just staring hard at her sister.

“Lydia would love me to come.”

“You still haven’t told me about the mysterious boy you met last time,” says Ruby.

“What’s that got to do with anything? I just want a nice girls’ night out with you two,” Ember retorts.

Ruby just raises an eyebrow.

“I saw what you ordered from that design company. I’d love to go to the fairy ball. When else will I get the chance?” Ember continues.

Ruby takes a deep breath, holds it a few seconds, then slowly exhales. “We had an agreement last time and you didn’t stick to it. I’m just worried.”

“I didn’t get drunk and I didn’t dance naked on the tables. So there’s absolutely nothing for you to be worried about.”

Ruby sighs. She says nothing at all for ages. She just looks as though she’s listing all the pros and cons in her mind.

“The same rules apply as last time,” she says in the end. “And this time you’ll stick to them, OK?”

Ember’s smile broadens.

“Deal?” Ruby insists.

“I would be delighted to accompany you to the Spring Ball, Ruby. Many thanks for your kind invitation!” declares Ember. When Ruby doesn’t respond, she exhales audibly. “All right, fine, I’ll stick to your rules, Ruby.”

“OK.” Ruby nods. “Then the three of us have a date.”

Ember cheers and digs her elbow in my ribs. “This is going to be amazing.”

I hope she’s right.