Page 38 of Safe (King’s Heart #1)

Grant

I watch him flit around the room, getting ready to leave for the day. Panic is boiling throughout my body with each minute that he gets closer to walking out the door.

My attention leaves him for a moment, eyeing the drawer of my nightstand. The envelope my uncle shoved under the door sits in there. Still untouched. I can’t bring myself to open it yet. And he’s about to leave me in here with it.

There won’t be anything in there that I like.

“Where are you going?” I ask him, pulling my gaze back in his direction, trying to make my voice sound bored.

I don’t think it works, because he slowly turns his head to me, a shit-eating grin on his face. “Why? You’ll miss me?”

I narrow my eyes and grunt as he pulls a shirt over his head.

He lets out a throaty chuckle as he sits on his bed, setting a pair of ratty sneakers on the floor in front of him.

“I’m going to see my family today.” He shrugs as he puts his foot in one shoe and bends down to tie the laces.

“There’s some carnival next to Simmons’s house this weekend. So we’re all going.”

“Simmons’s house?” I ask, completely confused about who this person is.

“He’s my coach from my old school. He has temporary custody of my brother and sister right now.”

My brow furrows. “Why?”

“Uh.” He sits up a moment. “He’s been kind of a father or big brother for us. He used to drive us all to school. He got me the scholarship to go to King’s Heart. I don’t know… he volunteered to take them in when my mom got arrested.”

“But…” I try to collect my thoughts, completely confused as to why this man—who isn’t even related to them—would do all this stuff. For nothing in return. “Why?”

He scrunches his face at me, cocking his head. “I don’t know. He cares? I guess. No one has done something for you just because they care?”

I stay silent and watch as his face morphs from puzzled to sad.

He quickly puts his other shoe on and goes to stand, swiping his wallet and key card from his bed. “Hey. Would you wanna go? I know it’s not exactly cool, but…”

He lets his voice trail off as he waits for my answer, and when I don’t say anything right away, he adds quietly, “I’d like you to meet them.”

My chest swells as a smile stretches across my lips. “Yeah. I’d like to go.”

The carnival is busy. We wait in a long line to get our tickets. And then once inside, there’s a throng of people congregating right by the entrance, blocking anyone else from being able to get by.

He leans in over the noise. “They said to meet them by the ferris wheel. Just follow me.” His hand slips into mine as he pulls me forward, weaving through the crowd until we make it to a clearing and head in the direction of the huge spinning ferris wheel.

I see the same three people from that first game. An older guy in his twenties and a smaller boy and girl. They’re huddled around each other until they spot Landon who’s wildly waving in their direction, then they all break into beaming smiles.

The little girl bounds toward Landon with outstretched arms. He meets her in the middle, sweeping her off the ground and giving her a quick spin that sends her descending into a fit of giggles. “Landon! I missed you!”

He sets her down and laughs as the other two start walking toward them, and I stand awkwardly a few steps behind. “I saw you last weekend, Gwenny.”

She tsks . “That was forever ago.”

He pats her on the head before moving on to the boy. He doesn’t act as excited, rolling his eyes when Landon ruffles his hair. “Stop it,” he grumbles but still goes in for a hug after.

Lastly, he turns to the older guy, the one he said was Simmons, and gives him a one-armed hug. “Hey, man,” they both say in unison.

Then quiet falls over their little group, leaving only the sounds of the carnival as they all turn their heads and look expectantly at me, waiting for Landon to explain who the fuck I am.

Stepping to me, he puts his hand on the small of my back and gently urges me forward. “Guys, this is Grant.”

The little girl bursts toward me, throwing her arms around my legs and squeezing. “I’m Gwen. It’s nice to meet you.” She lets go and looks up at me. “Are you Landon’s boyfriend?”

My eyes widen and immediately find their way to Landon, who also has a shocked expression and red creeping up his neck.

“Gwen,” Simmons steps up, wagging his finger at her.

“We don’t ask them that. We wait until after they leave and then we all talk about it behind their backs.

” He turns his attention to me and holds out his hand.

“Sorry. I’m Mike. Landon calls me Simmons so you can call me either. It’s nice to meet you.”

I nod and take his hand. “Grant. Nice to meet you too.”

He pulls back, a thoughtful expression on his face. “Grant… Grant? Wait. Wasn’t Grant the name of the guy who was giving you a hard time?

Landon cuts in. “Well, yes. But?—”

The boy quickly steps in front of me, a stern glare on his face as he looks up. “Well then not nice to meet you, fuckwad.”

“Danny, you cussed!” Gwen shrieks, pointing an accusatory finger at him.

He glares harder. “He deserves it.”

Simmons pinches the bridge of his nose. “Danny. Don’t cuss.”

Danny crosses his arms. “Fine. Then not nice to meet you, butthead .”

Simmons thinks for a moment before nodding. “Yeah, that one’s okay.”

“Bitch,” Danny mutters under his breath.

“Danny!” Gwen shrieks again.

“Guys!” Landon yells over everyone. “Yes. We had our differences. Before . But we’re good now.” He looks over at me and smiles, and it fills my whole body with light, lifting me right off the Earth.

“So, what are you then?” Danny asks in a perturbed voice.

Landon and I lock eyes, both smirking at each other. “Roommates,” I say at the same time he says, “Friends.”

Simmons chuckles. “You guys should get your story straight. In the meantime”—he looks at Danny and Gwen—“who’s ready to ride some questionable rides?!”

They both cheer—even Danny—and start heading in the same direction.

While they enjoy the rides, I speak when spoken to, but mostly I watch them all interact together.

They’re so happy to see each other. They have so much fun together. They love each other.

I’ve always been alone. Even when I had my parents, I was still essentially alone.

I’ve always known that.

But a new facet of that loneliness opens up inside of me while I watch them. It feels fucking terrible.

This group of people, who care and love each other so much—their existence compounds the fact that I’ve never felt that—reciprocal love and affection—and maybe never will.

After we’ve ridden a few rides, they lead us over to the food section, where they buy some things that sound absolutely crazy and take it all to an empty wooden picnic table.

Landon slides onto the bench next to me, looking at the empty space in front of me. “You’re not hungry?”

I shake my head as he sets a basket full of fried dough balls in between us. They smell like heaven and my mouth instantly waters.

“How do you feel about sweets?” he asks, subtly pushing the basket closer to me.

“They’re okay.”

He rolls his eyes, and picks one up, putting it close to my mouth. “These are honestly the best things on Earth. Swear to god. Try one.”

He inches it closer to my mouth, bumping the golden ball against my lips, then leans over to whisper, “Open up that pretty mouth, pet.”

I’m powerless at that point.

I do as I’m told, opening my mouth and willing my dick to stay under control in this family setting. I bite into the dough, suppressing a groan and closing my eyes as I chew the creamy, sweet food.

When I open my eyes again, Landon’s gaze is trained on my mouth, entirely too much heat radiating off of him.

Clearing my throat, I murmur, “What is that?”

He shakes his head, snapping out of the trance and biting it himself. “Fried Oreos.”

I raise my brow and lean over to take another look at the basket with a few more dough balls in it. “ Fried Oreos?”

He nods around a mouthful, swallowing before speaking again. “They’ll fucking fry anything here. Butter. Kool-Aid. Jelly beans. Nothing is off limits.” He turns to me, an assessing look on his face. “You don’t like carnival food?”

I frown and shrug. “I liked those a lot.” I gesture to the basket. “But other than that, I don’t really know. This is my first carnival.”

His mouth comically opens in a shocked expression. “No way! Why?”

“Well, my parents were… not into this type of place.” I look out in front of us.

The myriad of people and screaming kids running around.

The overflowing trash cans. The suspect rides with bored looking operators.

“They probably wouldn’t have been somewhere like this.

And then once they died, there was just my uncle… so, no. He didn’t take me either.”

He nods thoughtfully, his entire body turned toward me, eyes focused on mine, completely in tune with everything I’m saying to him.

I’m not sure I’ve ever had this kind of attention.

Like someone actually cares about everything I’m saying.

“I’m sorry about your parents. I know it’s been a really long time, but I don’t think I ever said anything when I was a bratty kid. ”

I let out an easy laugh despite the heaviness of our conversation.

“Yeah. It’s okay. You’re right. It has been a really long time.

” I pause, my heart stuttering in my chest at the thought of giving him more.

Of letting him in. Of sharing my pain with someone else.

But when I look back up at those eyes, still earnestly gazing at me, I’m flooded with a feeling of acceptance. I feel secure with him.

“It was just hard that it was so sudden. They were going to the country club for a bit. Like they always do. Brunch and catch up with their friends, and then they just didn’t come back.

” I drag my fingers over the rough table top, buying time away from the intensity of his expression.

“I know they didn’t leave me on purpose, but as a kid, it was hard not to feel that way.

That they left me and I got stuck with a practical stranger and a trust fund that was supposed to make me feel better.

” I sober quickly, clearing my throat and flicking my eyes up to him. “But yeah, you were a bratty kid.”

He smiles. “Not any more bratty than you.”

I widen my eyes and wince, my shoulders touching my ears.

Blowing out a breath, he pushes the basket away from him and contemplates something for a moment. “I feel like we’re in a better place now, so… why?”

“Why what?”

“Why were you like that to me? Back then?”

He waits while my body ratchets up into panic mode.

No one knows. No one knows.

My heart beats wildly while a cold sweat beads up all over my body, making my shirt sticky.

A half-eaten chili dog flies at my chest, the chili and melted cheese splattering on my shirt and landing in my lap.

Landon gasps and whips his head in Danny’s direction. “Danny! What the hell?”

“I didn’t mean to! I was aiming for the trashcan behind him,” he defends.

“I’m so sorry,” Landon murmurs at me while he throws napkins in my direction. “Let me go get more.”

He scurries off to find more as I wipe most of it off of my shirt.

I’m thankful for the distraction, because after that, Gwen begs to do the carnival games, so we leave the picnic tables and the uncomfortable conversation I didn’t want to face.

Gwen immediately sets her sights on a huge, stuffed Panda that’s hanging above all the other prizes. Probably close to impossible to win, but we all make it our mission. Even me.

And when I’m the one that finally—after spending way too much money—is the one to win it for her, I feel… really awesome. Like I’ve accomplished something great.

She hugs me again, throwing her arms around my legs and squeezing with all her might. I smile, awkwardly patting her on the back as she chants, “Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!”

When I look up and my eyes connect with Landon’s glowing expression, a warm smile on his face, I dangerously think that maybe I won’t always be alone.