Page 51 of Run For Me (Until You’re Mine Duet #1)

Chapter Fifty-One

Sailor

Midterms kicked my ass. Though I feel like I can breathe easier, it’s a short time before finals are here. I can’t let myself get behind again; I need to keep myself ahead of the game, stop staying up so late. I need to eat better, exercise, and just take care of myself more.

I’ve been in a strange fog the last few months from dealing with Sam and losing myself in JT—it needs to stop.

As much as I’ve felt better with JT, I’ve realized I only felt better with him because I was being myself. I don’t need him for that. I can very well accept myself, be me, on my own. Relying on him, on anyone, isn’t how I want to be. I don’t want to be that person. I need to do better.

The only thing in my way is letting JT know. I need to tell him this is done. That whatever this was is over. I will not tolerate someone who lies to me.

And when that’s done, I need to apologize to Sam. I need to explain myself to him, and I need to patch up our friendship and hope that he will move forward with a friendship. That’s all I want from him, and I hope he can accept that. If not, I’m not really sure what will happen.

Being in a relationship isn’t what I need right now. There are other things I should focus on, namely myself. I’m young and I have my whole life ahead of me. There is plenty of time to worry about boyfriends later.

But how do I tell JT?

Will I ever know who he is? And am I going to care once this is done?

What if he doesn’t accept it?

That’s an issue I hadn’t thought of until this very second.

What if he doesn’t let me go? What if he thinks this no is like the other no’s? What if he thinks it’s just another level to the game?

It’s been a few days since I’ve answered him. I know he isn’t happy with me, but he hasn’t shown up, so that’s a good sign.

I keep thinking about that guy I saw on my way out of the library last week.

I’ve seen quite a few guys who I thought were him, but something about that guy has stuck with me.

Bright blue eyes, short, cropped hair, nearly buzzed to his scalp.

There were tattoos along the side of his head, above his ear, and even one above his eyebrow.

I don’t know if JT has tattoos on his face. I’ve never seen that much of him.

It could have been him, but it could not have.

And I guess it doesn’t matter if it was or not.

I need to be smart about this. Though I’ve trusted him up until this point, he is dangerous.

He’s already overpowered me, so it’s obvious he could do it again.

And if he was angry, I’m sure that strength would heighten.

Yeah, JT is dangerous, and I need to be careful in how I do this.

Meaning, telling him outright isn’t the way to go.

Before I deal with that, I get myself settled by taking a shower, changing into comfortable clothes, and eating an entire box of mac and cheese. I make sure I don’t have any homework for the weekend—thankfully I don’t. We all got a break after mid-terms.

So now there’s only one thing left to do.

Talk to JT.

I pick up my phone and send him a text.

Me: Hey.

When he doesn’t answer after a few seconds, I put my phone down and grab the remote to look for something to watch.

After the last few weeks of going nonstop, I’m not used to having nothing to do.

I don’t remember the last time I sat down and watched TV.

Reign of Fire is playing, so I select that.

I get lost in it until my phone dings and pulls me away.

When I check it, I see it’s been over an hour since I texted him first.

JT: Hey

Me: What are you doing?

I keep my breathing even as I stare at my phone and wait for a response.

JT: Nothing. You?

He’s being weird. He must have noticed I’ve been distant, but he goes to college, so he had midterms too. Wasn’t he busy with them?

Me: Same. Thankfully. Midterms made me crazy.

JT: Are you feeling better now?

Me: Much.

JT: When can I see you then?

I knew this would come up, and I don’t know what to say.

Part of me still wants to see him, but… he lied to me.

If that hadn’t happened, maybe I could have talked to him about easing things off so I can focus on me and school.

This is nothing serious anyway, so it could have worked. But it’s the lie that’s ruining this.

Except… maybe he isn’t the liar here. Maybe that girl is. It’s been in the back of my head, and I’ve yet to give it attention. But it could be true. Even if he is the Jaxon she mentioned, it’s possible they aren’t together at all. It’s possible she’s just a jealous ex.

The mature thing to do would be to ask him—to talk to him about this.

Before texting him, I’d had a plan, but now that I am talking to him and see the difference in him, I don’t like it. I don’t like him distant, and I don’t like him uninterested. I like the attention he gives me.

Sighing, I put my phone down, chewing on my lip as one of the dragons spits fire everywhere. My gaze keeps flicking to my cell, until I finally pick it up and send another text.

Me: We need to talk before we see each other again.

Two seconds pass before my phone rings, his name flashing on the screen. If I don’t answer, he’ll call back. And if I don’t answer that, he’ll show up.

I don’t know this for sure, I’m just assuming by what I know of him.

Still, none of this scares me.

My annoyance with him lies in where the trust has been broken.

I swipe the bar and bring the phone to my ear.

“Hi,” I say softly.

“What do we need to talk about, little dove?”

I swallow hard. “Just stuff.”

“What kind of stuff?”

He doesn’t sound angry, just curious. A little cold, though. I don’t miss that.

Just be honest, Sailor. No need to be nervous.

“I…” I snap my mouth shut, taking a breath. “Do you have a girlfriend?”

It’s silent on the other end for a while. Well, it feels like a while. Could be only a few seconds, I guess. My heart is pounding so loud I wouldn’t be surprised if he heard it—or if I didn’t hear him because of it.

“Is this a trick question?” he says.

“No?” I answer.

“Are you asking if you’re my girlfriend?”

Oh… okay. Now I see the confusion there.

“No. Is there someone else other than me?”

“No.” His word is final. Believable. But…

“How do I know I can trust you?”

“Why would I lie?”

“Why do people do anything they do?”

Silent again for a few seconds, and then, “Why are you asking me this? What happened?”

“Nothing hap—”

“Don’t lie to me, Sailor. You’re asking for my honesty, and I expect yours in return.”

He’s right. Damnit, he’s right.

“There was this girl,” I start, and I swear I feel his anger coming through the phone. “And she told me to leave her boyfriend alone.”

Those are the only words I’m able to get out before he speaks again.

“What led you to believe she was talking about me?” I open my mouth, but then he says, “Wait. Is this why you asked for my name?”

I roll my lips between my teeth.

Caught.

“Yeah.” I hear a shaky breath on the other end of the phone. “Are you—”

“I’ll call you back,” he growls before ending the call. I stare at the phone, wondering if I should call him back. He sounded mad—so mad. I don’t think it was at me, but why is he mad? I need to know. So, I call him back.