Page 92 of Reverse Pass

“I told him you would figure it out. Now I just have to hope our parents don’t know.”

“They haven’t said anything if they do.”

“Well here’s hoping Cameron doesn’t blurt it out.”

“Yeah, about that. How do you keep that from me?”

“Oh god, Nora. He showed up the morning—I mean, do you want to know?”

“I mean… yes? No? Shit. I’m just going to pretend it’s not my brother. It’s some hot professor or someone. Go on.” She makes a little gesture and I continue the story of how Cameron showed up the morning after Ben and I had sex and the awkward party, and dinner.

“Wow. Yeah. See I would have loved to know all about that. I would have had lots of advice—namely that you not let Cameron into the house.”

“Joss gave me that advice, don’t worry.”

“Because she is wise AF and you should really listen to her more often. I wish I had a Joss.”

“Hey, you have me!”

“Yes, but you’re much nicer than her. Joss just tells it like it is, no sugar coating. I need that sometimes.”

“Fair enough, I guess.”

“I still love you. Even if you are breaking my little brother’s heart.” She narrows her eyes, and I shift under her gaze.

“I didn’t mean to. I did fuck up though. Lying to you. He overheard it and is furious with me.”

“Was that the reason for the animated chat in the snow?”

“You were spying on us?”

“I told you; you were being weird. Both of you. And when I saw him follow you outside… Like you wouldn’t have done the same thing!” she answers defensively.

I sigh.

“I’m not trying to break his heart. I have feelings for him. I want to be with him, I just was so worried what you’d think. What our parents would think. And I guess I feel like maybe he’s right to some extent even though I don’t want it to be true.”

“What?” She gives me a curious look, and I make a face, trying to warn her that the answer to her question is going to be something she doesn’t want to hear. “What is this random hot professor that is totally not my brother right about?”

“That I may or may not have initially slept with the professor because he was incredibly convincing, and quite good and definitely made me forget that Cameron existed.”

She cringes a little but seems to recover.

“So it was just physical at first but then?”

“I don’t even know if it was ever just physical. I mean he is an easy person to like. To be friends with. It’s hard not to be drawn to that, you know? It’s just he is distractingly good in bed and it kind of became about that. And I didn’t know what was lust or love, so…“

“Love?” she interrupts.

“I think so.”

“Like love because you’ve known each other forever and he’s like family, or love like you’re in love with him?”

“Both?” I say, giving a little shrug, still nervous that she’s going to be upset.

“Have you told him that?”

“Why? What did he say?”