Page 103 of Revealing Mark
“Getting into your car tonight was one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do. Was it something I wanted to do?”
He didn’t say anything.
“No, but I trusted you, and that’s the only reason I got behind the wheel of your car. At first it was scary but after a while it got better. I might not be ready to drive again just yet but I’m over the initial fear of my accident. As much as I hate to admit it, you were right to push me.” I reached for his hands and held them in mine. “I’m asking you to trust me like I trusted you.”
His forehead creased. “It’s not the same.” He withdrew his hands and turned his back on me.
It felt like he was withdrawing from me and it was difficult to stand my ground when all I wanted to do was throw my arms around him and tell him whatever he wanted to hear, but I couldn’t. I was fighting for us to have a real chance at being happy together, without secrets.
Look what one secret had done to my life already, I wasn’tgoing to let it happen again. If I stood firm he would come around, I just knew it. In the same way I knew he was someone who would never do anything that I couldn’t forgive.
His shoulders slumped and he bowed his head briefly.
I wanted to touch him, to bring him back to me, but I stopped myself. He had to do this on his own or else I would always feel like I had pushed him into it.
“Fine. If this is what you want.” The despair was evident in his voice and, for the first time, it shook my resolve. “Be ready at noon on Sunday.”
“Okay…sure.”
He walked away, leaving me standing there still clutching the keys to the car he had gifted me.
CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX
I didn’t hear from Mark at all, but at twelve on Sunday he knocked on my door. I was nervous and anxious. Whatever he was scared to tell me was going to come out today.
“Hi,” I greeted, but his jaw was tense, his eyes unwelcoming.
My smile waned.
“If this is how you’re going to be then maybe we should just skip it and call it a day?” I snapped. My emotions had been all over the place for the last few days and I was annoyed he was being obvious about his true feelings about telling me the secret.
I made a move to close the door but his foot jammed in to stop me and he pushed it open.
“I don’t have time for this. You wanted to know and now you’re going to find out,” he said angrily.
I crossed my arms. “Stop it.” This wasn’t the guy I was used to, the one who was always in control.
He looked tired and grumpy.
“I haven’t slept and this hasn’t been easy to organize,” he explained.
What did he have to organize? The deeper into this secret heled me, the more confusing it was. None of what he was saying was making any sense.
“Why do you have to organize something?” I asked, wanting to find out as much as I could to prepare myself.
He rubbed his hands over his face before dropping them to his sides. “This doesn’t just involve me.”
I frowned. His secret involved others?
“Just trust me,” he said, rubbing the back of his neck. “This will be easier to cope with if we do it my way.”
Cope with? How bad could it be? I felt a tremor of real fear but I was too far in to back out now. Besides, if we had any chance of being together, we had to put this to rest. I didn’t want to be half in a relationship for fear it couldn’t withstand some secret.
It had to be all or nothing. Having had him touch my life in the way he had, I couldn’t imagine him not in it as my boyfriend.
“So, what’s it going to be?” He arched an eyebrow.
“I’ll do it your way,” I conceded.All or nothing, I reminded myself.
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