Page 9

8

MIRABELLA

I lean my head against the back of the bathtub as my brain goes into overdrive. I thought a bath would help. Since I barely got a wink of sleep last night after he left. I cleaned up any evidence of him breaking into my house. I washed the blood away from the knife I threw at him. I righted the chairs. Then I drank half a bottle of whiskey hoping it would help me sleep. It didn’t.

I need to clear my head of everything Kilian Bancroft. But it’s easier said than done. He is the one man who has ever owned my heart. And I thought he was dead. I remember the day I saw the news. I was drinking a cup of coffee and it slipped from my hands. The one man that I would risk everything for was dead.

Years of regret hit me like a train. There were so many times I wanted to reach out to him. Apologize for disappearing on him. Apologize for that last night together when I needed to tell him something but chickened out. I shouldn’t have let my family threaten me. I should have followed my heart. But I didn’t. And I left him.

I cried for days after the news broke that he was dead. Aria tried to comfort me even though she had no idea why. Magda was just as confused as Aria. She gave me a week off. She brought me food every day and made sure Aria made it to practice. But I couldn’t tell them. I couldn’t tell anyone about Kilian.

I dance my fingers over the top of the water. I’m relieved he is alive. But what does it mean? What does he want with my brother? What does he want with me?

Ezio is an idiot and no doubt got himself buried in shit he shouldn’t have. But why did that bring Kilian back into my life?

The harder question I keep trying to ignore is am I going to see him again?

I pinch my eyes shut at the thought. At the memories of his body all over me.

“Mama!”

Aria’s voice shakes me from my thoughts. I look at my phone and see it’s past noon. Maria told me she would drop her off on the way to picking up her twins.

“Just a minute,” I yell, not sure if she can hear me.

But I don’t even get a minute as she bursts through my bathroom door and runs to the bathtub. “Last night was so much fun! We got to make pizzas and ice cream sundaes and then we watched movies until midnight!”

“You stayed up until midnight?” I ask with a surprise in my voice. “I’m gonna have to talk to Tina’s mom about that.”

“No, Mama, don’t! We didn’t do anything bad. We—”

I cut her off with a laugh. “I’m kidding, princess. That’s so fun! Did you talk about boys?” I tease her, knowing she is getting to the age where cooties turn into crushes.

“Eww no.”

I breathe a sigh of relief, knowing I still have time before that happens.

“What did you do?”

Besides get tied to a chair and throw a knife at a man I want you to meet. “Oh nothing. Fell asleep watching a movie.”

“Then why do you look so tired?” she asks me. Her inquisitive brain definitely a family trait.

I pinch her cheek. “I kept tossing and turning in my sleep because I missed you.”

She pushes my hand away. “Whatever, Mom.”

“Why don’t you get started on your homework so I can get out of the bath?”

She groans. “But I don’t have any science homework. Just stupid social studies.”

“Well you’ll never get to play professional football if you don’t pass your classes.”

“Ugh, fine.” She huffs as she stomps out of my room and down the stairs to her own room.

I sigh as I stand from the tub, grabbing a fluffy towel from the warmer. What I wouldn’t give to tell her about Kilian. Tell her about a time in my life that was special and meant something. Tell her things she should know. But I can’t. Not yet. She is too young still. Too innocent.

* * *

“Can I get you anything else?” I ask the table in front of me. They shake their heads and I wander to the bar. Luigi is working today, a man a few years older than me.

“Slow day?” he asks me.

I snort. “Obviously. This downpour is not doing anything for business today.”

“I just wish someone would sit at the bar. Could use someone to talk to.” He pauses and laughs. “Besides you, of course.”

I shake my head and look at the tabletop clock behind the bar. “It’s almost seven. Maybe a few people will stumble in.”

“One can hope.”

I give him a curt smile and go check on the handful of tables I have left. I am off at eight. Aria is at Tina’s house while I work. I yawn, bored from a slow Wednesday night. The one night shift I work that usually makes me a good amount of extra cash. The dinner crowd more likely to tip than the lunch crowd.

When my last table leaves, I slide onto one of the barstools at the near-empty bar. Luigi got lucky and two people came in half an hour ago and sat at the bar.

“Sticking around?” he asks.

I nod. “Waiting for the rain to slow a bit before walking home.”

“Whiskey then?”

“You know me too well, Luigi.”

“Not well enough, Mira.”

I bite my lip and close my eyes. “Not happening.”

“It’s worth a shot.”

“And it’s never worked for you.” The man has been asking me out on a date every time we work together for the last three years.

He shrugs as he pours my preferred whiskey into a glass. “Maybe one day you will say yes.”

I sigh. “Maybe you should spend your time chasing after another woman.”

“I chase after plenty.”

I snort. “You are not winning your case here.”

He pours himself a shot and knocks his glass against mine. “I just worry about you and Aria. Don’t you think she needs a father—”

I hold up my hand, stopping him. “No. We are fine on our own.”

Luckily for me the two patrons at the bar wave Luigi over. I know what he was going to say. Just like Magda says, even Salvatore. I need to date. Find a good man. Someone that could be a father to Aria.

Some days I agree with them. But it’s mostly to get them off my back. She has a father. A good man. He just doesn’t know it. And I can’t see anyone except for him being her father.

Even when I thought he was dead, I didn’t want anyone to take on his role. But he isn’t dead. He is very much alive. I saw him in the flesh for the first time in ten years, five days ago. But he doesn’t know.

I look out the window as I slowly sip my whiskey. Watching the rain patter against the old window, the metal frame covered in patina.

I think back to meeting Kilian. That day he walked into the bar I worked at in Dublin. He was a cocky prick. But there was something about him. Something that made me crave his attention. And it wasn’t the fact I got him to buy me hundred-euro whiskey.

He was charming. In a way that most men weren’t that came into the pub. I had just met him but he was already protective of me. I liked the way he called me doll, even when I pretended I didn’t. He practically purred it and that sound went straight to my core.

Just thinking about him now is doing things to me. The way he acted when he broke into my house. And the way he acted when I finally gave him the time of day. They are two different men. But they are both a Kilian I know. A Kilian I used to love.

I wrap my sweater tighter around me. The temperature dropped significantly since I left for school this afternoon. Fall is soon going to turn to winter. I can almost feel the welcoming touch of snow on my skin.

I walk past the pub I work in, it’s a few blocks from Trinity and on my way home. A few people are outside smoking and laughing obnoxiously. The windows are beginning to steam up from the temperature difference outside to inside. I see the fireplace roaring and a handful of patrons sitting around it.

Then I notice him. I know his name is Kilian only from his credit card. We never actually introduced ourselves. Even with him coming into the bar the last four days I’ve been working. As much as I hate to admit it, I like having him there. He drives me wild when he calls me doll. And we argue back and forth the whole time. But I like it. It makes my nights go by. And his presence scares the boys my age away. I’ve seen him scowl at them whenever one lays a hand on my arm or tries to get my number. Kilian always gets my attention right away and finds a way to get me to lean over the bar as he whispers something in my ear. Usually something completely dominant and filthy, trying to break me into telling him I like a dominant man. But I won’t break. He then skims his finger along my jaw or down my arm and every young horny boy in that place stops flirting with me.

I wonder what it would be like to kiss him. Like really kiss him. Not that quick, hard, fast kiss from the first night. But one where we explore each other with our hands. Where his filthy tongue does the things to my mouth that he teases me with words. Maybe even let him do those things he whispers to me. Let him devour my body inch by inch. Feel him pulse inside of me.

I groan as I think about him, my fingers running across my lip as I find myself still standing outside the pub, staring at the man. I wonder if he went there for me tonight.

Before I know it, I am walking into the pub and sitting on the empty stool next to him. Thankful there was a seat. Standing next to him would be too obvious.

I order a drink without looking at him but feel his eyes on me. I try to hide my smile as I talk with the man next to me. A regular that I see weekly since I started. When Sean, the bartender, comes back with my drink he starts talking to me about I don’t even know what. Because Kilian’s eyes being on me has moved to his hand. It sits on my thigh, underneath my long sweater. He doesn’t move it, just leaves it there, with a random circle of his thumb every now and then.

If one touch from this man can cause me to space out, what the hell would happen if I let him kiss me, lick me, fuck me? I probably shouldn’t find out but every single nerve ending in my body is begging me to.

When Sean finally stops talking to me, I nod and turn toward the man that is making my insides turn to mush.

“What are you doing?” I whisper-yell at him.

“Nice to see you, too, doll.”

I ignore that word. “Are you stalking me?” I ask because I can’t think of anything else to say.

He raises a brow at me as the left side of his mouth rises in a smirk. “Considering I was here long before you showed up, I believe you are stalking me.”

I roll my eyes. “You know what I mean.”

“I don’t think I entirely do,” he says before taking a sip of his whiskey.

“Why are you here?”

He raises his glass at me. “What does it look like?”

I click my tongue at him and turn back to the bar. “Sean!” I yell. I quickly glance over at Kilian and he looks at me inquisitively.

“What can I get you, Bella?”

“I’ll have a double Redbreast fifteen year.”

“Uhh… I don’t have to tell you how much that is since you work here.”

I smirk smugly at him. “Oh, well this kind gentleman offered to buy me one,” I say as I gesture toward Kilian.

Sean glances toward Kilian and I follow his gaze. Kilian looks over at me, a hint of displeasure on his face. “I never said that, doll .”

I clench my jaw at that word, he knows well enough how it makes me feel. “I swore you were just saying how you came by here in hopes I would be here so you could buy me a drink.”

He runs his tongue over his bottom lip. “I actually said, I wonder how much it takes for you to drink before your clothes start to fall off.”

My eyes widen at his words, pink flushing my cheeks. Sean coughs behind me and I am not sure if he wants to kick Kilian out or know if that’s what he really said.

“Get the lady whatever she wants,” Kilian tells Sean without taking his intense, lust-filled gaze off me.

“Sure thing,” Sean says before I hear him scurry off.

Kilian leans into my ear. “Trying to make me broke?”

“As if you could go broke?” I say, trying to pull away from him but his hand lands on my hip, making me not want to move.

“How do you know?”

I guffaw. “I knew you were rich from the beginning. Your bespoke suit kind of gives you away. Not to mention the drink you order.” And the way he presented himself was just like my family and his attitude like all the assholes in private school. Not that I am going to tell him that.

He doesn’t take his eyes off me as he speaks. “I could have been a prick trying to look rich.”

I laugh at that. “You would never have bought me as many drinks as you did if that were the case. One night, and you would have been trying to fuck me like those pricks do.”

His hands suddenly pull my stool closer so my knees are locked between his. “You better not be letting those pricks take you home and fuck you.”

I try to pull away but his hands reach for my jaw. The look in his blue eyes is possessive, hungry, and it’s making my panties damp. “Why do you think you have a say—”

“Because you belong with me,” he growls, cutting me off.

“I don’t belong—”

“Shh.” He pauses, running his thumb over my lip. “Not yet, but you will.”

I roll my eyes. “You are gonna have to try a lot harder than that, Casanova.”

He drops his hands and throws his head back laughing, the sound going straight to my core. Why the hell is he so fucking handsome?

We both hear a throat clear and turn our heads to see Sean staring between the two of us. “Umm, here are your drinks. I’m just going to…” He walks away without finishing his sentence.

I drop my head and smile as I feel Kilian’s hand back on my thigh. When I look over at him he is handing my whiskey glass to me. “I’m Kilian, by the way.”

I take the glass and blush. “I know. I saw it on your credit card.” I watch as he picks up his glass. “I’m Bella.”

“It’s a pleasure to meet you, Bella. But I much prefer doll.”

I fight the urge to roll my eyes and instead slam back the hundred-euro whiskey since I know it will piss him off.

“Cheers,” he says to himself before taking a sip of his drink.

We spend the next two hours laughing and giving each other shit. Being around him is much too easy. Too playful. I find myself smiling more than I have in the last three years.

After one too many cocktails, I realize the time and tell him I need to leave.

“I’ll walk you home.”

I shake my head. “Not necessary. I only live a handful of blocks away.”

“How many is a handful?”

“Five,” I mutter, knowing if I don’t tell him, he will find a way to get it out of me.

“You aren’t going to walk home alone that far at this time of night,” he says abrasively.

“I do it all the time. At least while the weather is nice.”

“You don’t have a coat.”

I scrunch my brow at the subject change.

“I’ll let you borrow mine for the walk home. Then you can give it back.”

I sigh as I stand from my stool. “Sorry, Kilian, but I am not letting you walk me home.”

“Why is that?” he asks as he flags down Sean.

“Because someone like you would try to take advantage of me.” I turn and rush out before I let him answer.

I hurry around the corner and down the next block, my body freezing. What the hell was I thinking flirting with that man all night? I cannot get involved with him. He screams power. Maybe I am overthinking it but he is not the kind of man I can date knowing my family will find out. Some random student, my uncle wouldn’t care about. But a man like Kilian and I know my uncle would put a hit on him.

It’s stupid for me to feel anything for the man. But the way his blond hair falls across his forehead when he laughs too hard does something to my insides. Just like the way his sapphire eyes turn more cobalt when I see the lust in them. Or the way I want to feel the light scruff on his square jaw rub against the inside of my thighs. Ugh, I need to get him out of my head. Maybe I should quit.

I feel a drop of water hit my face. Dammit, I didn’t bring an umbrella either.

I start to walk faster, hoping I avoid a downpour when I feel a strong grip wrap around my bicep. I go to scream as I think of everything Kilian said about walking home alone at this time when I smell cedarwood and spice with a lingering scent of woodsmoke. And I immediately know it’s him.

His hand wraps around my throat as he pushes me into the brick building I was walking past. His other hand is on my waist, his body flush against mine.

His lips are so close to my mouth when he says, “You left without saying goodbye.”

“I didn’t need an escort,” I hiss as my heart rate speeds up from his touch. From the feeling of his hand at my throat.

“What if it wasn’t me that pushed you into this wall?”

“I am sure you wouldn’t have been far behind since you clearly followed me. Like I said, stalker.”

He growls and I feel his breath on my lips, if I were to lean forward an inch I could brush mine against his.

“What am I going to do with you?” he moans as his head drops toward my neck, lightly kissing me below his hand.

I whimper as I feel his lips on me. “Whatever you want.” My brain instantly regrets the words as they fall from my lips. But my heart rate speeds up and my core turns molten.

“Good girl,” he says into my ear. His lips twisting into a smile as they brush over my cheek. “Very good girl.”

His lips are on mine a second later and I can’t help but moan from my first true taste of him. He tastes like whiskey and peppermint. A spiciness all his own.

I wrap my arms around his neck and he pushes me farther into the bricks. His grip on my hip tightening, his fingers on my throat squeezing. I can’t help but push my own hips into his as he presses his tongue across my bottom lip. I grant him access and I nearly lose my mind from the way he devours me. My entire body is on fire from this kiss alone, I can’t imagine what sex would feel like. Hell, I shouldn’t be thinking about that. But I can’t get the thought out of my head. If this man can kiss me like this, what would it feel like with his lips on my pussy?

His hips push into mine and I feel his hard-on. I moan as he pushes his thigh between my legs, rubbing against my center.

“Fuck, Kilian.” My words are breathless.

“You taste like every desire I’ve ever had,” he groans into my ear.

I find his earlobe and bite hard. “And what are those desires?” I purr.

“Doll, you don’t want to know.”

I pull away from him despite his protests. “What if I do?”

He growls so loud as he drops his hand from my throat and grabs my ass, lifting me up, so I wrap my legs around his hips.

“We shouldn’t do this here.”

“I would fuck you on a stage in front of thousands, doll.”

“We can discuss that later,” I manage to get out as I grind on his dick.

The few sprinkles of rain start to turn heavy and I shiver from the ice-cold drops.

“How far are we to from house?”

“Three blocks,” I whisper.

He sets me down and grips my hand. “Good thing we are across the street from mine.”

Before I know it, he is pulling me toward a three-story brick building with indigo shutters.

“Earth to Mira.”

I blink a few times and then look over at Luigi, who is staring at me like my head fell off. “What?” I ask.

“I’ve been saying your name for five minutes.”

I feel my cheeks turn red. “Sorry I got lost in thought.”

“Clearly,” he says as he folds his arms across his chest. He nods to my empty glass. “Want another?”

I could use ten more.

“No, I need to get Aria and head home.”

He nods. “Be safe getting home. See you next week.”

I jump off my barstool and run to the back to grab my things. I hurry out the back door to pick up my daughter. Embarrassment still flooding my cheeks over what I was thinking about.