Page 7 of Rebel Secrets (Devils Hockey #3)

Chapter Five

Six weeks before the wedding

R ebel

“You want me to what? And with who?”

“I want you to dance with Erin during the wedding party dance, and Mom wants us all to take lessons. I already told her we would.”

I was sitting in my apartment shoving food down my throat before the Redtails’ next game. We were two games into the last round of playoffs and up two games on our opposition.

And I’d never felt this kind of pressure in my life.

It was a great position to be in. The Redtails were winning.

Yeah, the level of play was higher than the Devils’, and it was fucking hard every fucking day.

But every day it got a little easier, too.

I gelled more with my teammates. I’d picked up the hockey system pretty quickly.

Coach had been surprised by that, I think.

Hell, I’d even made a few friends.

“I told Mom this wouldn’t be problem.”

I heard the question in Rowdy’s voice, directed straight at me. He’d clearly just asked me if I was going to be the problem.

“I know you and Erin don’t get along but?—”

Suck it up. “That’s not going to affect your wedding. Whatever else you’re thinking, don’t. I’m not gonna fuck this day up for you.”

“Reb, that’s not what I’m saying at all. I know you wouldn’t. Never even crossed my mind. I just need to know you’re gonna be comfortable enough to do it. If you’re not, we’ll figure something else out.”

And right there was why my brother was a “golden retriever,” according to my sister. The guy couldn’t help himself. He needed to make sure everyone around him was okay. Rowdy had a spine—and he was definitely no pushover—but sometimes that spine wiggled like he had a fucking tail.

Okay, that didn’t make complete sense, but you got the picture. Rowdy wanted people to be happy. And it worked on his last nerve that I was such a miserable SOB most of the time. I was working on that.

“It’ll be fine.”

“You sure?”

“Ask me again, and I’ll make sure Erin and I look better on the dance floor than you and Tressy.”

My brother’s laugh made me wince a little, it was so loud.

“Not gonna happen, dude. Tressy and I have natural rhythm, on and off?—”

“Say another word, and I’ll make you limp down the aisle.”

More laughter because he knew I’d never do anything to sabotage Tressy’s big day. I loved that woman like a sister. And she was the perfect woman for Rowdy. Which still didn’t prove that there was someone out there for everyone. Even if Rain and Brian were pretty good together, too.

“So you’re still coming stag to the wedding?” Rowdy asked when he stopped laughing.

“When the hell do I have time to date, much less meet anyone? Especially now.”

“Yeah, I gotta say you’re making us all proud as hell of the way you’re playing, Reb. You’re kicking ass.”

The praise made my chest tight, damn him. “Thanks.” And since I really didn’t want to touch that subject right now, I deflected. “Hey, that book you suggested is pretty great.”

I wondered if he’d let me get away with it and, luckily for me, he did.

“I knew you’d like it.” The guy sounded practically giddy. “I mean, come on, who doesn’t love dragons.”

“It’s got a good story. The dragons are a bonus.”

“Yeah, the dragons aren’t the reason I told you to read it. I knew you’d connect with the heroine.”

And he was right. Of course.

The female lead character had issues, and I identified with a lot of them.

No, I wasn’t female, and I didn’t live in a world filled with mythical creatures and magic and enchanted libraries.

But she dealt with a lot of the same issues I did.

Anxiety, panic, depression. The trifecta of my dysfunction. So yeah, I identified.

And surprisingly, I’d recently discovered a love of reading, which I’d confessed to Rowdy one night back in September.

I’d texted him when I couldn’t sleep. The next morning he’d told me to read a book, and I’d be asleep in minutes.

I thought he’d been joking, but I’d been desperate.

I didn’t want to take meds. They’d make me slow on the ice.

I couldn’t risk it. Been there, done that.

It was bullshit. But I also knew if I didn’t get enough sleep, I’d have other issues.

So I’d asked him for a recommendation. And after a few minutes, he'd given me the title of a fantasy book with fairies and vampires and werewolves.

It’d kind of reminded me of the movie Underworld, which I fucking loved. Who couldn’t appreciate Kate Beckinsale with fangs in a black shiny skinsuit. But that book had had a hell of a lot more sex. And I discovered I didn’t actually hate that part of the book as much as I thought I might.

And so, our little book club had begun.

“And you were right. As always.”

Rebel snorted. “According to our sister, I’m never right.”

My turn to laugh. “What’s she on your ass about now?”

“She says we’re not moving fast enough on the youth program.”

“Are you?”

“Dude! You’re supposed to be backing me up.” He paused. “But she’s not wrong. We’re running into a few more obstacles than I thought there’d be.”

“Yeah, like what?”

“Red tape from the city council.”

“Why are they giving you a hassle? You’d think they’d be all over this shit.”

“They’re not giving me a hassle. It’s more me learning to deal with this shit. Pop just made this all look so easy.”

I heard something in Rowdy’s voice I didn’t hear much. Doubt. “Pop knew what he was doing handing the reins over to you. I know that for a fact. I also know he wouldn’t have done it if he didn’t think you could do it.”

A pause. “Yeah, well some days I just want to throw in the towel and tell Rain she’s on her own.”

Since I knew that wouldn’t happen, I just smirked.

“Shit. Sorry. Didn’t mean to dump this on you,” he said. “But if this keeps up, I might need the number for your therapist. How’s that going anyway? You still keep in touch with that guy?”

“Yeah. We talk once a week. Actually, a few of the guys have sports psychologists, so it’s not that unusual.”

“Good. I’m glad you feel it’s helping. And you know you can always talk to me too, right?”

I rolled my eyes, knowing he couldn’t see me, but I knew he meant every word. Because he was Rowdy.

“I know. And I appreciate it.”

“Good. And you should. All right, I know you’ve got a game tonight so I don’t wanna hold you up any longer. And Reb?”

“Yeah?”

“I appreciate you being good with this.”

“Of course.”

“Talk to you.”

The call disconnected, and I set the phone on the table next to my plate. While I finished my food, I debated making another call. It’d be the right thing to do. It’d be the decent thing to do.

And still I sat there staring at my phone.

“Damn, what’d that phone do to you?”

Ian walked out of his bedroom in sweats and a t-shirt, running a hand through his hair like he was trying to flatten it. Wasn’t working worth a damn.

“It asked me stupid questions before I finished eating.”

Ian stared at me, his mouth hanging open a little and his eyes squinty, for several seconds before his face scrunched, and he barked out a laugh.

“Okay, maybe I deserved that.” He walked over to the fridge and began to pull out food container after food container. “But, dude, you look pissed.”

I shook my head. “I’m not. Just thinking about something I’ve gotta do.”

“According to your face, you don’t wanna do it.”

While he put his meal together, I mulled that over. What the hell was wrong with me that I didn’t even want to call Erin? It’s not like we’re mortal enemies. She was just too damn…happy. It was suspicious as fuck. I mean, no one could be that happy all the time. It just wasn’t natural.

Be a fucking adult.

Yep. I got up and put my empty plate in the dishwasher, grabbed my phone off the table and ruffled Ian’s hair on my way to my bedroom to make this call. He waved his hands around his head like he was chasing away a bat.

“Dude, I’m not twelve. Jeez.”

No, but he reminded me of Rocky. Ian was a couple of years older than my younger brother, but he still brought out the old man in me.

“I need to make a call. You wanna catch a ride with me to the arena?”

“Okay, yeah, thanks.”

Ian’s beat-up pickup needed major work before I’d ever get in that death trap, so I always offered to take him with me on game nights.

“Leaving in half hour.”

I heard him mumble “Okay” as I closed the door behind me. Sinking onto the edge of the bed, I pulled out my phone and pulled up Rain’s message chain. I know she’d texted me Erin’s number at some point and for some reason I couldn’t remember.

I finally found it after scrolling for at least fifteen seconds.

My thumb hovered over the number for longer than I cared to admit before I pressed it.

And when it began to ring, I got hot around the collar.

Which was just fucking ridiculous. I needed to get over whatever the hell this reaction was to her.

I wasn’t going to fuck up Rowdy’s wedding because I couldn’t not be a decent human for a couple of days.

But when the call went to voice mail, I breathed out a sigh of relief, like I’d dodged a bullet. At least for now.

“Hey, Erin. It’s Rebel. Just talked to Rowdy about the dance lessons. Just checking in to…” What? Why the fuck had I called in the first place? “Just thought we should touch base beforehand. Give me a call back. I’ve got a game tonight, but I’ll be around all day tomorrow.”

I hung up and started getting dressed for the game.