Page 36 of Prudence (Balfe Family #1)

“If you want my opinion, I think you’ll be a great replacement. I believe you’ll breathe new life into the hotels, new ideas. You and your brother did most of the leg work opening the location in Cork, and that’s been a huge success. You should have more confidence in your abilities, Derek.”

“I’m getting there,” he said, and though I knew I was eavesdropping on a very private conversation, I found myself stepping forward and peering through the crack in the door.

Derek’s bedroom looked almost exactly as it had when he was a teenager, and I fought against a surge of memories.

He and Paloma stood by the window, and she had her hand on his upper arm as though to comfort him.

Something twisted in my stomach to see her touching him, a possessive emotion I forced down.

She was the mother of his children and had far more right to touch him than I did.

A moment seemed to pass between them before Paloma smiled, “So, is there any particular reason you’ve started to take better care of yourself?”

“What do you mean?”

“Well, one of the main reasons a man starts making improvements is for a woman.”

“And?”

“I was just thinking maybe we could have a night together? Just sex. This tour has been gruelling, and I’ve sadly been neglected in that area. I wanted to make sure you’re not seeing someone so that I’m not treading on anyone else’s toes.”

My mouth fell open in silent shock. She was propositioning him?

Seriously? Was this a regular thing between them?

I suddenly felt ill, and I knew instantly from my reaction that what I’d been feeling for Derek ran so much deeper than simple attraction.

The idea of him having a no-strings night of passion with his ex-wife made me feel panicked and jealous and heartbroken and so many other dizzying emotions I had no business feeling.

Needing to leave, I stepped away from the door, but I was so frazzled that I basically tripped over my own feet, creating a racket as I levelled my palms against the wall to keep from hitting the floor.

I heard Derek’s low, gruff response, “Not that it’s any of your business what I do or who I see, but you and I definitely won’t be—" His words fell off as he seemingly heard the noise I made, and a second later, he emerged from the bedroom.

“Milly?”

My throat clogged with embarrassment, and I could scarcely talk. Tears pinched at the corners of my eyes. Finally, I managed to blurt, “I’m sorry. I needed to speak to you about Deirdre sleeping over at your place tonight. I didn’t mean to—”

I fell silent when Paloma appeared, standing next to Derek and looking between us in question. “Oh, hello, we haven’t met yet. I’m Paloma, Gigi’s mother.”

Tears continued to fill the backs of my eyes, but I managed to hold them at bay. “Yes, hello, I’m Milly. Deirdre’s mam.”

“Milly!” Paloma gushed. “I’ve been dying to meet you. Gigi’s told me so much about you and your daughter. Deirdre sounds like such an amazing young woman.”

I nodded, feeling the intense urge to flee. “She is. And Gigi is just wonderful, too. It’s nice to meet you, but I better get back to the party.”

Awkwardly, I turned and began walking back toward the staircase when I heard Derek say, “Give us a minute.” A second later, a strong arm locked around my middle and gently guided me into Nuala’s old bedroom. Derek closed the door behind us, and I spun around, flushed, “What are you doing?”

“Why are you acting like you’re about to have a panic attack? What happened?” Derek’s dark brows furrowed, like he had every right to pull me in here. Then again, perhaps this made us even since I did almost the same thing to him at the parent teacher evening.

“I’m not having a panic attack,” I said, my voice clogged with unshed tears. “I just—”

“You just what?” he came closer, penning me in against the wall, and my pulse began pounding in my eardrums. His clean scent invaded my nostrils, and his warmth felt like it was seeping past the thin material of my dress even though no parts of us touched.

I blinked, and mortifyingly, a tear escaped and fell down my cheek. Derek’s focus went to it immediately, his expression serious as he watched its descent. This was the most embarrassing thing to ever happen to me, surely. Crying over a man who wasn’t even mine to cry over.

“I overheard some of your conversation with Paloma, her proposition, and I … God, I’m so ridiculous. I don’t even know why I’m upset.” I looked up, my eyes locking with his. “Please don’t feel like you have to humour me with any of this.”

“Humour you?” Derek said, his voice laced with disbelief.

“Yes. It’s your daughter’s birthday, and I’m—”

“She was completely out of line,” he said then, cutting me off. He sounded furious, and I blinked in surprise. Derek’s brow was wrinkled, his eyes locked on mine as they swam with concern. “I need you to understand that I will never, not even for one night, be revisiting that relationship.”

“You do?” I squeaked, my eyes flicking back and forth between his, but all I saw was the truth, no deception in his words or on his face.

“We divorced for a reason. It’s been over for five years, and Paloma knows it.

” The fervency in his voice had my chest fluttering.

“She also knows she shouldn’t have asked that of me.

I have no idea what’s gotten into her, but I think maybe being away from the kids for so long has made her nostalgic or homesick in some way. ”

His words had my throat tightening, my lips turning dry. “Derek,” I ventured, my voice oh so tentative, and his eyes flashed to mine. I swallowed thickly and forced myself to continue, “Why are telling me all this?”

His eyes darkened as they zeroed in on me. It was like he was trying to peer into my very soul. Instead of answering, he met my question with one of his own as he leaned in even closer, his lips ghosting against the shell of my ear and causing my entire body to tremble. “Why are you crying?”

“I’m not.”

Derek arched a sceptical eyebrow and gently thumbed away the wetness on my cheek, not needing to say a word to argue my lie since he had the evidence right there.

My breath hitched when he lifted his other hand and caressed his knuckles over my cheek.

“These eyes, they’ve always fucking ruined me,” he murmured, and I gasped when his knuckles continued their descent down to my jaw, along the curve of my neck and lower to my sensitive collar bone.

“You look beautiful today,” he continued.

“When I saw you earlier, I couldn’t stop staring.

” Was that when Tara witnessed him looking at me?

Could she be right about the longing she saw in his gaze?

“I like how you look, too,” I replied stupidly, and a sexy yet tender smile graced his lips.

“Yeah? What do you like about how I look?”

Something in his gaze had me feeling bold as I reached up and gently palmed the stubble on his jaw. “I like this,” I whispered, and he seemed to melt into my touch, his cheek pressing into my palm. “I sometimes wonder how it feels …”

“What else?”

“Your eyes, how you look at me. Your mouth. Your body. How much bigger than me you are.”

“ Fuck ,” he swore then buried his face in my neck, pressing a wet, open-mouthed kiss to the overly sensitised flesh, and I let out the tiniest moan. My head fell back against the wall as he continued kissing my neck, spreading a wave of tingles down my spine.

I felt his hands go to the skirt of my dress, hitching it up when suddenly there was a loud commotion that came from downstairs.

Someone—Derek’s mother it sounded like—screamed, “Padraig! Oh, my goodness!” and we instantly pulled apart, sharing a concerned glance before we left the room and hurried downstairs.

I was still trying to get my head around what just transpired between Derek and me when we entered the kitchen and found several people gathered around Derek’s father, who lay unconscious on the floor.

Out in the garden, Gigi, her mother and the other party guests were eating cake, entirely unaware of what was going down in the kitchen.

“What happened?” I asked, immediately shifting into doctor mode. I wasn’t an emergency medic, but after all my years in the hospital, it was second nature for me to take charge when someone fell ill around me.

“He just collapsed,” Jo said. “One minute, he was standing there talking to me; the next, he mentioned feeling a little dizzy; and a few seconds later, he went down.”

I went to the sofa by the door, grabbing two of the velvety cushions. Kneeling before Padraig, I quickly checked to ensure he was still breathing before I placed the cushions under his feet to elevate his legs.

“Go open the windows. We need fresh air in this room,” I instructed Nuala, who wore a startled, panicked expression before she nodded and sprang into action.

“He was complaining of a headache earlier,” Tristan said just as Padraig came to, blearily peering about the room in confusion like he had no idea what just happened.

“Okay, I need everyone to give Padraig some space,” I said then looked to Derek. “Is there a medical kit in the house?”

“I think so. I’ll go look for it.”

He left, and I turned to his mother, “Did you call for an ambulance yet?”

“No, I’ll do it now.” Jo started ushering everyone out of the room before going to make the call, leaving me to see to her husband.

As I peered down at the man I’d been taught to resent for so many years on behalf of my aunt, I put all my preconceived judgements aside and set about treating him like I would any other patient.

He stared up at me, dazed and confused.

“Hi there, I’m Milly. Remember me?” Very slowly, he nodded.

“I’m just going to loosen some of your clothing,” I went on as I undid the first few buttons on his shirt before loosening his belt.

“Your wife is calling an ambulance, and they should be here shortly, but in the meantime, I want you to remain lying down and try to relax. Can you tell me your name, today’s date and where you are? ”

He appeared to swallow, his brow furrowing as he replied, “Padraig Balfe, it’s May 27, my granddaughter’s birthday, and it appears that I’m lying on my kitchen floor.”

I smiled a little at his dry humour on that last part. “And how are you feeling? Any pain?”

“I’m a little foggy headed. My tailbone feels bruised, and I’m thirsty.”

“All right. I’m going to get you a glass of water, but please stay where you are.”

As I went to the sink to fill a glass, Padraig said, “You’re the one who doesn’t like me.”

I blinked at his blunt statement, turning off the tap as I returned to kneel by his side. Placing the water down for a second, I said, “I’m going to help you sit up, but we need to do it very slowly.”

“Okay.”

Padraig allowed me to manoeuvre him into a sitting position before I brought the glass to his lips. He took a small sip before looking at me again as though waiting for me to address what he said.

“I don’t dislike you.”

Padraig gave a weak chuckle. “I’ve worked in the hospitality sector for over forty years, my dear. I know people and their body language. You, Miss Milly, are deeply uncomfortable whenever you run into me.”

Ah, hell, it was the awkward encounter in the hotel elevator that gave me away, wasn’t it? Releasing a breath, I decided to be candid for a change. “Nell Partridge is my aunt. She told me about your relationship with her back when you were teenagers, about the baby.”

Surprise claimed him before a sad expression passed over his aged features. “Ah, so that explains it,” he said, a hint of sorrow and regret in his voice.

“Yes,” I agreed, lifting the glass so he could take another sip.

“I always regretted how that turned out, but I just wasn’t ready for marriage back then. I was seventeen, barely knew how to do my own laundry, but I was determined to help with the child if she went ahead and had it. I would’ve tried my best.”

“Marriage?” I asked, frowning.

Padraig nodded, his expression faraway like he’d travelled all the way back there.

“Your aunt probably told you all this, but when she discovered she was pregnant, she said the only way she’d keep the baby was if we wed.

I told her I couldn’t marry her, but that she and the baby would be cared for.

I’d get a job, make sure the child wanted for nothing.

Unfortunately, she wouldn’t accept that, and I understand now why she didn’t.

It was a different time. Having a child out of wedlock was considered a shameful thing by many. ”

My gut twisted as I listened to him speak.

Was he lying? Surely not. Padraig was still very dazed, and in my experience, it was moments of foggy headedness when people tended to speak honestly.

He had, after all, just confronted me about not liking him, and I doubted it was something he’d ever bring up if he had all his wits about him.

I didn’t know how to feel, didn’t know what to think.

Why would Nell leave out such a vital part of the story?

In her version, Padraig told her outright he didn’t want the baby and that she should terminate the pregnancy.

She painted him as the out-and-out villain and said nothing of asking him to marry her, nor of his promise to get a job and care for her and the child after it was born.

“That wasn’t quite how my aunt told it,” I said, and Padraig’s gaze met mine just as Derek stepped into the room.

“I found it at last,” he announced, carrying a small green box while I tried to comprehend the possibility that my aunt had lied to me in such a way that it had possibly changed the very course of my life. But why?