Page 181 of Preacher Man

In that moment, Zara’s heart squeezed in her chest, it had been the right move but felt shitty to deliver that kind of news. Whether Hawk cared, or hecared, he sounded disturbed.

She began to press the red disconnect, when---

“Girl?”

“Yeah? I’m still here, Hawk.” Did he want her to pass on a message to Gia, maybe?

“Thanks.” And he hung up.

Just as well, and great timing, she thought, as Rider barreled his tall self through the kitchen doorway, his face a tight stern mask. “Ready to go, Icy?”

“Yeah. Hold up, honey.” She was already grabbing her purse, they wouldn’t need much, just a day or two of overnight clothes, once they’d heard about Gia’s surgery it was a done decision to take a trip, Rider was too worried about his baby sister to rely on relayed messages to find out about her condition. Hopefully, by the time they got to Texas, everything would be alright.

Remembering to text Angela, Zara felt bad they were going to miss her birthday this weekend, she would be fifteen, and being the first since she lost her parents Zara had planned a whole big thing for her. Soon as they were back, she’d spoil the girl shopping together.

As it was, she was nervous due to more than just worrying over Gia. It would be the first-time Zara was meeting his parents. And from all accounts, Rider’s father was a difficult man. She went to him, leaned up and cupped his cheeks, his head fell forward to compensate their size difference, stroking his beard, she kissed his lips, once, twice, falling in love with him all over again. “Gia is going to be okay, biker-man.” Sharing a few moments with him in their own little oasis, Zara looped arms around his waist.

Rider drew in a breath, resting his forehead against hers, she smiled and kissed him lightly again. “Love you, Icy.”

“Yeah, you do.” She grinned and laced their fingers. “Come on, let’s go.”

******

Across in Louisiana, the heat was blazing hot, but Hawk didn’t notice the clammy warmth or the sweat dripping into his eyes, the dead muscle inside his chest busy restarting making him move before he even realized a single step. Striding through the NOLA chapter clubhouse, into the room he’d been using as his own, he had his backpack pulled out of the closet and he began stuffing clothes into it with no care of how he did it.

It took him precisely three minutes to have his shit together, he found Shark in his office, letting the southern Renegade Souls president know he was taking off.

They shook hands briefly, while he hated the dirty town, the prez had been a fair man taking him in as he had, he would have tried to convey his gratitude for a few minutes longer if his heart wasn’t already lodged in his fucking throat, he had no patience to stand around and talk bullshit he couldn’t give a shit about.

He was on his bike a minute later. Gunning the engine. His mind and eyes focused on one thing only.

He’d arrive in Texas around eight and half-hours’ time if traffic was on his side.

Goddamn, the one time he'd ask for divine intervention.

The little bit of a thing was hurt.

She was fucking hurting and having surgery.

Now he felt like a total heel for how he’d spoken to her recently. Weeks had gone by and she hadn’t reached out again. He’d thought it was for the best, even as his mood plummeted harder into the dirt, he felt like shit, he should have called her sooner to apologize but he hadn’t been able to find the words. He’d been a fucking tool.

It was for the best, he supposed and other fucking lies he rammed down his own throat.

And yet he was speeding off to Texas to be nearby, he had no other choice, his fucking body was dragging him there even as his mind was screaming.

No other choice. He repeated over and over. He had to make sure for himself Gia was going to be alright.

She would never know he was there. No one would know.

He’d stick around only for a while to make sure he decided an hour into his grueling journey, he wouldn't fucking sleep ever again if there was a chance Gia wasn't going to be fine.

She wouldn’t need to know.

He could keep a discreet watch on her without interfering in her life.

Yeah, he fed that lie to himself like it was fucking chocolate pudding,eat it, you dipshit, choke on the fucking lie.

After all, Hawk was all about the selfless.