Page 5

CHAPTER FIVE

Gray

“This toolbox is a disaster.” I sorted wrenches, separating out the nuts and bolts that had meandered into every compartment, metal clinking and rattling.

“I know exactly where everything is,” Bailey called from across the garage. “Don’t fuck with my system!”

I pulled an empty Red Bull can from the chaos. “Are you shitting me with this?”

Bailey stomped over and snatched the can from my hand. “I don’t know how that got in there.”

Holden spoke from the open doorway of his office. “Because you’re a slob, Bailey. I’ve been telling you to clean your shit up.”

Bailey whirled on him. “You’re going to take his side?”

“There are no sides,” Holden said. “We’re brothers.”

Axel stepped through the open garage door, Sugar and a little Chihuahua trotting along at his heels. “Someone forgot to tell Gray that.”

I sighed. “Tough crowd.”

Axel ignored me and looked at Holden. “You got any swanky banquets tonight?”

Holden snorted. “Not tonight.”

“Good. Drinks at eight. Angel’s gonna be there, and I want to pick her brain about a new tattoo.”

I perked up. “Is she any good?”

Axel’s jaw clenched. “Too good for you.”

“Oh, is she your girlfriend? Don’t worry. I’m not gonna move in on her. I’m—” I stopped short, biting back the word gay.

I wasn’t used to keeping it a secret. In fact, it hadn’t even occurred to me to tell Emory not to share that little detail. The golden boy probably wouldn’t be telling anyone about me, though. Not considering the mess I’d found him in.

Bailey laughed. “Axel doesn’t have girlfriends.”

My eyebrows shot up. “Boyfriends?”

“He doesn’t do relationships,” Holden clarified.

“I can talk for myself,” Axel grumbled. “Maybe I don’t want Gray knowing my fucking business.”

“Everyone in Riverton knows your business,” Holden said.

“And Granville,” Bailey added. “And probably Lincoln and Omaha. Have you made it to the northern border yet?”

Axel smacked the back of his head. “Just for that, you’re buying the first round, asshole.”

“But I can’t even drink!” Bailey protested.

Sugar sat obediently by Axel’s heels during this exchange, tongue lolled out. She looked nothing like the threatening beast who’d greeted me the other day. The Chihuahua wandered closer, sniffing at a food wrapper that had missed the trash can.

I crouched down, holding out my hand. “Hey, there, cutie…”

The little rat snarled and snapped at my hand. I yanked it back, but the terror kept coming for me. I overbalanced and sprawled on my ass.

“Taz, no! Heel! Heel, damn it!”

Teeth latched into my jeans, frighteningly close to the goods, and Taz growled and tugged as if he was trying to win a game of tug-of-war.

Axel scooped him up in one hand. “Naughty boy, we can’t eat dicks. I know you think they’re tasty, but they’re not for you.”

I cupped my dick and balls, needing some reassurance they were unharmed. My heart raced as if I’d just faced down a ten-foot grizzly.

“That little monster should be on a leash!”

Holden and Bailey burst into laughter.

“What?” I clambered to my feet. “He’s scarier than Sugar!”

Axel smirked while Taz licked his face like an adoring puppy. “You’re right about that. Sugar behaves.” He scratched behind Taz’s ears. “This one can be a real shithead. But he’s a loyal shithead.”

He sent me a flat look, just in case I didn’t get the subtext that I was not a loyal shithead.

“Taz has gotten us all,” Holden said. “Welcome to the club.”

“He’s named Tazmanian Devil for a reason,” Bailey added. “It was just especially funny to see you so shocked. Chihuahuas are ferocious.”

“He doesn’t look very ferocious with Ax,” I grumbled as Taz continued to snuggle with my brother.

“His affection is earned,” Axel said. “I’ll see you all later. Bring your money!”

He whistled sharply as he turned, and Sugar trotted out the door behind him.

“You’re all going out?” I said.

Holden and Bailey exchanged a look. Bailey shook his head no.

Holden cleared his throat. “We’re going up to the pool hall. They have half-price drinks on Wednesday nights.”

Bailey groaned. “Axel will shit a brick.”

“He’ll get over it,” Holden said. “Both of you will.” He held up his wrist, displaying a tattoo I hadn’t seen before. There was an infinity design, sort of a figure eight, and inside each loop were words: Bro and Code . “Brothers, remember? Even Gray. Especially Gray.”

“Especially?” Bailey said. “Why especially ?”

Holden locked eyes with me. “Because he was my first brother. Hell, he was the first person to ever have my back. So now, I’ve got his.”

My throat grew tight. “Thanks, Holden.”

He nodded once. “You’re still on tow truck duty.”

I groaned, and Bailey laughed. “You know, I’m almost glad you’re here, so at least I don’t have to do that bullshit ever again.”

“Ever again?” I barked. “I better not be on shit duty forever. ”

Holden smirked. “You want off it? Bring me some new business. You can scout out the bikers when we get to Ball Breakers.”

We went over to the house and took turns showering and getting ready. I dressed in jeans and a black T-shirt, then spent the next fifteen minutes styling my hair. It was thick and wavy, definitely my best feature, but it took some work to look good.

Holden banged on the door. “Train’s leaving the station. Move your ass.”

I grumbled under my breath, teasing at the strands with my fingers one last time before opening the door. “Didn’t know we were in a rush.”

“A rush?” Bailey called from the stairs. “You take longer to get ready than Nova does!”

Holden smirked. “Your hair looks very pretty, though.”

I slugged his arm playfully on reflex.

Holden flinched, face going white.

I snatched my hand back. “Shit, I’m sorry.”

“It’s fine,” he gritted out between clenched teeth.

Bailey came flying down the hall. “What the fuck is wrong with you, Gray?”

“I wasn’t thinking?—”

“Did you get fucking amnesia while you were gone?” Bailey spit, eyes hot with fury. “You don’t touch Holden without his say-so.”

“I know!” I swallowed. “I’m sorry, Holden. It’s been a long time, and I just slipped. I’ll do better. I promise.”

He nodded, lips pressed tight. His color was coming back. His breathing was a little shaky, but it wasn’t the desperate gasping that accompanied a panic attack.

He closed his eyes, inhaling a deep breath and then letting it out slowly. Goddammit. I can’t believe I’d forgotten about Holden’s aversion to touch. It’d been really bad when he was a kid. Full-on panic attacks that were scary as fuck. Mom said it was because his bio parents abused him. We had to give him space and time to heal, she said.

But all these years later, and he still wasn’t healed. It broke my fucking heart.

“Do we need to cancel?” Bailey asked. “I can call Axel and?—”

“No,” Holden barked. “I’m okay.” He took one more deep, long breath and exhaled. “I’m okay,” he said in a calmer tone. “But I need a fucking beer.”

“I’ll buy,” I said.

He nodded. “All right, then, let’s go.”

The pool hall was tucked between a tattoo parlor and a strip club on the highway between the auto shop and Riverton’s downtown district. Beyond that, a community college sprawled out, cute little neighborhoods all around it. Riverton got its name from the river that ran along its west border, but rather than lovely scenic trees and trails, there was an industrial district with meat-packing plants and farm equipment manufacturers.

Because of the town’s design, there was very much a right side and wrong side of town, and we’d always been on the wrong side.

But so was the pool hall, so we fit right in as we went through the door. The place wasn’t empty, by any means, but it was a hole in the wall, so there were no crowds to jostle Holden. His shoulders were high, his body rigid, so I knew not all the effects of my fumble were gone.

“I’ll go buy a pitcher of beer,” I offered. “You care what kind?”

“Whatever’s cheap,” Holden said.

I nodded and slunk off. Axel was over at the bar, chatting up a short, curvy woman with green hair piled in a messy bun. She wore a low-cut tank top that showcased ample cleavage, tight jeans, and more tattoos than even Axel had managed. And given that he’d stripped off his shirt and his body was a fucking masterpiece of artwork, that was saying something.

“Holy shit, Ax, I thought I was addicted to ink,” I said. “This is something else.”

He didn’t look thrilled at the interruption, but the woman turned, eyes lighting up with recognition. “Gray? Holy shit. I didn’t know you were back!”

I took in her features, the brown eyes, the splash of freckles over her nose. “Angel, as in Angela Meadows? Wow. You’ve changed.”

Her smile turned a little flirty. “You’ve grown up pretty nice yourself.”

Axel rolled his eyes. “You can’t fuck my brother after fucking me. I’ll be scarred for life.”

Angel laughed. “If we go by that rule, poor Gray won’t have much of a dating pool, will he?”

“Not my problem,” Axel said with a smirk. “He can go find a hookup in some other town.”

The bartender, a hulking guy who looked more annoyed to have customers than grateful, came over. “What do you want?”

“Pitcher of whatever’s on special,” I said, reaching for my wallet.

He went to work without another word. I tossed a twenty on the bar.

Axel resumed talking ink with Angel, gesturing to a patch of empty skin over his ribs. Ouch. That would hurt like a bitch.

“You know, maybe a set of poker cards, with the hearts and spades?—”

“He’s staring at you again,” Angel interrupted.

I followed Angel’s gaze to the…sheriff’s deputy sitting at the far end of the bar. He nursed a beer, and sure enough, his brown eyes were fixed on Axel.

The look was intense.

He either wanted to fuck Ax or kill him—maybe both.

Axel just snorted. “He’s been riding my ass lately about this poker game I run. Says it’s illegal. But he can’t prove shit. All he has are rumors.”

“Ax, seriously?” I said. “Holden would be fucked if you went to prison over something so stupid.”

Axel’s expression hardened. “You mean like we were fucked when you ran away like a coward?”

“Wow, you two don’t pull your punches, huh?” Angel said. “I guess you really are brothers.”

She left us with the tension of an ugly storm gathering between us.

“I know I hurt you by leaving,” I said in a low voice, “but I didn’t know what else to do.”

“You could have stayed.”

“It would have made everything worse, Ax. I was trying to protect you.”

“Bullshit. Whatever it was, you were protecting you. I know something went down with Dad. Ask me how I know, Gray.”

I hesitated, getting a bad feeling.

“ Ask me ,” he snarled.

“How?”

“He punched me in the fucking face when I asked where you’d gone and told me to never ask again. You weren’t my brother anymore.”

“Shit, Axel, I’m so sorry. I didn’t want you all dragged into it. That’s why?—”

“I didn’t believe him, you know. We were brothers. We had the code.” He tapped his wrist, and in the same spot Holden had shown was the same infinity design. “You wouldn’t just leave. Wouldn’t leave me with him , the way my fucking parents left me over and over?—”

“I fucked up,” I rasped. “I know I did. I was a kid, and I was scared, and I fucked you over, Axel. I did. I own that. I’m so fucking sorry that he hurt you because of me.”

“He didn’t hurt me. That’s not the point, man.” Axel grabbed his tank top off the bar and pulled it over his head. “ You hurt me more than he ever could.”

He walked off, leaving me reeling with the truth that I’d been trying not to admit for ten long years.

I’d let my foster dad win—and in the end, my brothers had paid for it, anyway.