Page 28 of Ordinary Secrets (Secrets Trilogy #1)

28

ARELLA

I’ve got a full belly as we leave the restaurant in Long Beach where Trey took me the first time we had dinner together. We slow-danced as a female duo sang perfectly harmonized love songs accompanied by their keyboard.

A dark sky stretches above us as we head to my thinking spot for another evening of stargazing. It was Trey’s idea, and I didn’t hesitate to say yes. I love being able to share the place that used to be my safe haven with my new safe haven.

“I liked waking up next to you this morning,” I say with his hand in mine. It’s rare for us to be in the car without holding hands.

A quick “same” is his response. He doesn’t even look away from the road.

“I can see us having more mornings like that.”

He answers with a slight nod and a somber “Me too.”

He’s been somber a lot today. Always staring off into space with a pained look in his eyes. Whenever I ask what he’s thinking about, I get the feeling he only tells me a version of the truth.

My truth is that I can see Trey and me having more than just mornings where we wake up together. I can see us spending more days together like we did today, barely leaving each other’s side. I can see me going on tour with him and his band after they finish their album. I can see him helping me paint the walls of my future bakery and him being there when I sell my first cake. I can see us having it all together. Only problem is... I’m not confident if he sees all that.

Whenever I bring up the topic of our future together, he avoids it. Earlier today, I casually asked if he ever wants kids. His answer was a gloomy “Yes, but I’m not sure if that’s in the cards for me.”

“Why is that?” I asked.

Instead of answering, he changed the subject.

Besides owning a bakery, my other dream is to be a mom. I love children, and working with other people’s kids every day isn’t enough. Someday, I want my own. If Trey doesn’t ever want kids, I’m not sure if this can work.

My quiet man parks his car on the side of the gravel road where I normally do. Together, we grab our things and head into the woods. At the top of the narrow trail is that same giant oak tree that’s always provided me comfort whenever I needed it. A slight breeze blows my hair around as Trey lays out a blanket for us.

“You’re gonna do great,” he says as he unpacks his guitar from its hard case. He thought it’d be fun to teach me some simple chords. I don’t even know the difference between a simple chord and a not-simple chord. Still, I’m willing to learn because it’ll make him happy.

We’re about an hour into my first guitar lesson when I’m finally getting the hang of it. So far, Trey has taught me four chords. Learning to play guitar isn’t as easy as he makes it look. I can barely remember where to put my fingers, let alone switch between chords fast enough to play a song.

“That’s perfect!” He flashes me one of his panty-wetting smiles. “Now play a D.”

I glance at my numb fingers with the string indents in them. “But it hurts.”

“That’s normal. Once you play enough, you’ll build up some calluses, then it won’t hurt anymore. See?” He shows me his hard fingertips.

“How long will that take?”

“Depends on how often you play. Maybe a few weeks. Maybe months.”

“Months?” I grip the neck of his guitar and hand it back to him. “Thanks for the lesson, Mr. Grant. Now, how about you serenade me instead?”

Through dazed eyes, he runs his tongue along his bottom lip. “Don’t say my name like that. It does things to me.”

I narrow my eyes and smirk. “Oh? What kinds of things?”

“The bad kind.”

I like the sound of that. “Tell me, Mr. Grant. What are these bad things you speak of?”

His expression darkens. “I mean it.”

“Mean what, Mr. Grant?”

His guitar gets thrown to the side with a loud clank! The next thing I know, he’s launched himself at me, pinning my back to the blanket. Our lips meet roughly. His sweet scent drapes over me like warm air on a chilly day. He fixes my wrists above my head with one hand while his other hand cups my neck to hold me in place. He doesn’t need to cement me down like this. I’m an enthusiastic captive.

Eventually, our kiss turns into a clothes-clawing, lip-biting, beautiful mess. As I slide his shirt up, I run my fingertips along every hard dip of his abs. Our mouths part for the split second it requires me to tear the fabric over his head, and then we’re back to kissing in a frenzy.

“I can never get enough of you,” he groans.

“Take more, then.”

Every part of me craves to feel his hands on my bare skin. I rip my dress off to reveal the new matching bra and lacy panties I got today. Trey attacks me with his mouth. He goes for my neck first before sliding his lips down my chest. He scratches at my bra hooks and unhooks them within seconds. The lace gets thrown behind him. I arch my head back as his mouth latches onto one of my nipples.

“Trey,” I moan toward the stars.

I grip his hair, heaving him closer as my other hand clutches the blanket beneath us. He hooks a finger through my panties and drags them down. They get tossed behind him too. They haven’t even touched the grass before his tongue is lapping me up. I grab a handful of his hair as a tingling pleasure shoots up my body and down my legs.

With the perfect pressure, he circles his fingers over my clit. I squirm beneath him as he slides a finger inside me, then two. The entire time he moves them back and forth, he never stops licking me. My hands claw at his shoulders, begging for him to suck me harder. He must hear my silent plea, because he does, and I let out a whimpering moan.

His wet lips pepper kisses up my belly until he reaches my nipples again. He sucks on one while his fingers keep hammering inside me.

“You like that, baby?”

My response is an animalistic “Mmm.”

That encourages him to keep going.

My fingertips graze his muscular chest and abs, all the way down to his zipper. I’ve barely gotten his jeans unbuttoned when he snatches my wrist and slams it above my head. Then he continues to lick my breast as if he didn’t just deny me.

My other hand tugs at his messy hair to pull him back to look at me. “I want to touch you.”

“If you touch me, I’ll need to own your body.”

“Then own me.”

He groans, biting his lip. “Don’t tease me, baby.”

“I’m not. I want you.”

He freezes. “Really?”

I take in the beautiful sight of him. His gorgeous face that I love to kiss. His defined arms that hold me tight. And his eyes. Those beautiful blue-gray eyes that always stare at me with desire and admiration. I nod firmly. “Yes. Own me.”

His lips smash against mine again. He holds himself up with one hand while the other drags his zipper down. I shove the denim off his hips as he nips at my neck.

Soon, his jeans are thrown onto the grass too. Kneeling next to me, he hooks his thumbs behind the elastic of his boxers, then stops. I gape at him, urging him to shed the fabric, but he hesitates.

“You sure about this, babe?”

I nod eagerly. Will you just get naked already?

Finally, his boxers come down and his thick, hard erection springs up. It bounces a few times as I lose my breath and marvel at his size. Before I can touch him, he pins my arms down and kisses my neck. I moan and wrap my legs around him, desperate for him to enter me. He presses his erection against my inner thigh as he sucks my bottom lip into his mouth.

Panting, he releases my arms to grab his cock. With a dazed look in his eyes, he slides the tip up and down over my wet clit.

He’s right outside my opening when I push him away. “Wait.”

He stills above me. Then suddenly, he’s off me, lying on his side, roughly dragging a hand through his hair.

“I’m sorry,” he whispers, shaking his head at himself. “I shouldn’t have pushed you this far. I knew you weren’t ready.”

What is he talking about? “I’m more than ready, Trey. Having you inside me is all I can think about right now. I just want you inside my mouth first.”

All the worry dissipates from his eyes as his breath hitches. I climb on top of him and take his throbbing length into my hands. I wrap my fingers around his base, then stroke him up and down. His massive cock pulses and jumps between my palms. It’s everything I imagined it would be. Firm, full, and satisfying.

Impatiently, I take him into my mouth, and he lets out a deep, guttural growl.

“Oh, baby.” His hand grips the hair at the back of my head, guiding me into a rhythm as my head bobs up and down. “That feels so good.”

That motivates me. I take him deeper and harder, changing pace from fast to slow, then fast again.

His breaths grow heavy and short. “Shit. Babe. Stop.”

I don’t.

“Please. I can’t hold back any longer.”

When I still don’t stop, he forces me to. In a single motion, he flips me onto my back and straddles me.

“Do you want me?” he asks, his nose barely a hair from mine.

Each pound of my heart against my chest screams, Yes, yes, yes!

This man has done things to me. He’s made me feel safe again when I wasn’t sure I ever could. He’s healed me. He’s made me feel like I deserve to be with a man who touches me with affection, not abuse. He’s made me feel like I’m me again. The me I was before I was made to feel weak and scared all the time.

Do I want him? Yes. More than anything.

“Own me, Trey.”

That is all the permission he needs to press his cock against my opening and push inside.

I whimper, gasping as he fills me. Pain and pleasure ripple between my legs. He goes slow at first, allowing me to stretch and get used to his size. Each time he draws back and pushes in again, he goes deeper. I moan beneath him, arching my head back as I take his cock the way I’m meant to.

With a grunt, he plunges into me all the way.

An uncontrollable wail escapes me as my fingernails dig into his back.

He stills. “Am I hurting you?”

“No,” I pant. Total lie, but I don’t want him to stop.

He kisses my forehead as he moves inside me. Soon, the soft pain turns into pure pleasure as all the protective walls I’ve spent years building up come crashing down.