Page 43 of On the Edge

‘Okay if I come in and restock?’

‘Sure.’

A reply flashed on Nel’s phone.

Didn’t get the chance to talk to Frisk today.Hopefully tomorrow.

Nel sighed.

‘Nice to see Poppy earlier,’ Viv said, taking a large bottle of handwash out of a cupboard under the sink.‘She’s a beautiful girl.’

‘She is.I don’t envy her though, being a teenage girl in this day and age.It’s a bloody minefield.’

Viv laughed.‘You sound like an old lady!’She started to refill the soap dispenser.‘I know what you mean though, with SnapChat and TikTak and what have you.’

Nel smiled.

‘You know,’ Viv’s voice softened, ‘I might have had a daughter the same age as Poppy.’

‘Really?’

Viv turned the bottle back upright and sat it on the sink.‘I was pregnant when Lauren had Poppy, so she’s been my touchstone over the years.However old Poppy is, my baby would be just that bit behind.’

‘What happened to your baby, Viv?’

‘The father and I weren’t … together.Not properly.He was just a … you know … a friend, I suppose.’There was a faraway look in Viv’s eyes.‘I was forty-three.Growing up I always assumed I’d have kids, but by then I’d accepted that it wasn’t going to happen for me, so it was a shock when I found out.For me, but even more so for him.’

Nel just nodded, giving her the space to keep talking.

‘He wanted me to have a termination.’She paused, her eyes glassy.‘I hadn’t decided what I would do, but then I lost the baby somy decision was made for me.’She took off her glasses and wiped her eyes with her fingertips, trying to avoid smudging her mascara.‘God, look at me, how silly!’

‘It’s not silly, Viv.It’s not silly at all.’

Chapter 25

Nel checked her phone between every appointment the following day, hoping for an update from Jimmy, but there was nothing.By midafternoon, her mild impatience had escalated to intense frustration.When she saw that her last appointment was at four o’clock she decided to take matters into her own hands and visit Faye.The thought of seeing her filled Nel with deep trepidation, but Jimmy was right.She would never find out the truth if she kept avoiding people.

The wrought-iron gate squealed as she pushed it open, her skin tingling with a thousand memories.Running under the sprinkler.Sitting on the stone steps eating banana Paddle Pops.Practising backward walkovers on the lawn.Even the cracked path was familiar.

She knocked quickly before she could change her mind.

‘Nel,’ Faye said softly when she opened the door, looking at her with the same grey eyes Nel remembered, now creased at the corners.

‘I hope you don’t mind me stopping by,’ Nel said.‘I didn’t get the chance to talk to you at the funeral.’

Faye gave her a sad smile.‘I wasn’t feeling well.’She invited Nel inside, out of politeness probably, rather than desire.

The house had hardly changed.Dozens of framed photos lined the dresser, most of Maddie.Nel studied them as Faye scooped tea leaves into a pot.There was the clink of china as she placed the cups onto saucers.‘How’s your mum?’

‘She’s okay, I think.It’s hard to say though, isn’t it?’

‘Yes, I’ve always wondered that,’ Faye said thoughtfully as she filled the teapot.‘How is one meant to grieve?’

She poured milk into a small jug and put it on the table.

‘How are you and Geoff?’Nel asked.‘He must be busy with the election coming up.’

‘Yes he is.Even when he’s not campaigning, he spends a lot of time in Canberra.’Faye poured the tea into the cups.‘Milk?’