Page 38 of On the Edge

‘Don’t think so.’Lauren narrowed her eyes.‘Why are you so interested anyway?’

‘What do you mean?’

She shrugged.‘You two were talking for ages.What are you doing, becoming best buddies with her?She’s Ryan’s wife.I know what you think ofhim.’

‘I’m just being friendly.I like her.’

Lauren scoffed.‘Well, like I said the other day, no one needs you coming back to town and making trouble.’

Nel held her hands up in mock surrender.‘Okay, okay, bloody hell.’She looked over at Cath, who was wiping down the island bench.‘How do you think Mum’s going?’she asked, keen to change the subject.

‘Hard to say.’Lauren followed her line of sight.‘How’s someone meant to be after their husband of forty years dies so suddenly?’

‘It hasn’t hit her yet,’ Nel said, still watching her.‘Not properly.’

‘Has it hit you?’

‘I don’t think so.’Nel looked back at her sister.‘It’s like Iknowthat he’s gone, but I can’t quitebelievethat he’s gone.Do you know what I mean?’

Lauren nodded.

‘I just … I never thought he’d die so young.I feel …’ Nel’s voice trembled.‘I don’t know, I feel kind of …’ She paused, trying to make sense of her emotions, put words around them.‘Ripped off.’

Lauren looked at her.‘Ripped off?’

Nel nodded.‘Cheated.Like I’ve had something stolen from me.I thought there would be years and years ahead, and suddenly there’s just … nothing.’

Lauren went to speak, but seemed to decide against it.

‘What?’Nel said.

She shook her head, eyes glassy.‘Has it ever occurred to you that that’s how we’ve all felt, ever since you left?’

Chapter 22

Nel was woolly headed when she arrived at the clinic on Monday morning.She’d had more to drink than she meant to at Lauren’s place.Then when they got home, Cath had opened a bottle of red, which they drank in front of a British drama about the murder of a young woman in a small seaside town.It had felt a little too familiar for Nel’s liking.

When she went to bed, her brain was buzzing, her thoughts jumping between Maddie and the comment Lauren made, about feeling cheated by Nel’s absence.Nel knew her parents probably felt that way—if she thought about it too much she felt sick with guilt—but it had never occurred to her that Lauren might too.She’d always seemed so busy with the kids, so fully immersed in her life here in Carrinya, that Nel hadn’t thought her sister even missed her.But maybe she’d been wrong about that.

She fumbled in her bag for the keys, but they weren’t there.She swore under her breath.Hopefully Viv wasn’t far off.She needed coffee.

Thankfully, The Larder was empty at this hour.

‘The good doctor!’Dave said.‘Flat white to go?’

She nodded, surprised he remembered her order.A warm feeling washed over her, a sense of belonging, but it was quickly replacedby the prickle of suspicion.He’d probably heard the rumours by now.She buried herself in her phone.

There was a tinkle as the door swung open and a tall, pale woman entered.Nel glanced up, accidentally catching her eye.A flicker of recognition crossed the woman’s face.

‘Hello,’ she said.

Nel gave her a nod and a tight smile, then looked back at her phone.Did she know her?She didn’t look familiar.She stole another glance, but Nel didn’t recognise her at all.She was probably just another nosey local who knew more about Nel than she should.Nel kept her head down until her coffee was ready, then she hurried back to the clinic.

As she sat at her desk sipping her coffee, she decided to call the practice manager at Health First and break the news that her return would be delayed.Her mouth felt dry as she listened to the phone ring.

‘Pam Postle,’ said a voice on the end of the line.Brisk.Efficient.

‘Pam, hi, it’s Nel Foley.’