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“Fuck!” I growl down at the bitch sucking down my cock.

My hands grip her hair tight as I fuck her mouth.

The harshness of my movements has mascara-stained tears descending down her face as she heaves and gags on my cock.

But I couldn't care less; to be honest.

This is for me; my pleasure, not hers.

With a hard yank, I pull her head back by her hair, changing the angle of her head slightly so I can fit more of myself down her throat.

Once I’m fully seated in her mouth, I begin thrusting again, much harder this time.

I’m not holding back, until finally, I explode down the back of her throat.

I quickly pull out of her, tightly pinching her nose with my forefinger and thumb, making sure she swallows every drop.

Only once I’m convinced that she has, do I step back.

I let her go with a shove, and tuck my cock back into my jeans, before turning away.

I let go of the strong urge to shower, to scrub this bitch off me until my skin is raw.

I run my hands down my face disgusted with myself, swallowing the bile that is threatening to surface.

“Get the hell out!” I yell, not caring to look back.

She doesn’t move right away so I yell louder, “What are you still doing here?”

I hear soft whimpering from behind me, as she gets up from her knees and heads toward the door.

I should feel bad, but I don't.

Nothing about her makes me care in any way.

“Don't you dare...Shut your mouth,” I shout at her.

I can’t cope with the crying, she knew what this was going to be before she came here.

She exits the room sniffling, having the audacity to slam the door as she leaves.

Why am I surrounded by all these mundane nobodies? Does anyone around here actually have any kind of personality? Clearly not.

I might as well fuck a doll.

At least then I won’t need to look at some sour faced bitch glaring at me.

That's probably why it has been taking me longer to get off these days.

Sex just doesn’t appeal to me anymore; all I need is a blowjob a few times a week from some warm mouth.

Don’t get me wrong, I have screwed my fair share over the years, but I haven’t found anyone that really piques my interest enough to keep them around.

These bitches are all the same, just some hole for me to fuck.

Nothing special; nothing unique.

It’s not that I am looking for ‘the one’ or anything like that.

I just need more; I need…

God knows, I just need something.

Something better than this.

Someone that makes me feel, well…something, anything really.

When you live in a world like mine, people are only out for themselves.

What they can get from me, and so forth.

They don’t want me for me.

The real me.

But I still live in hope.

That has got to count for something at least.