Page 111 of Moonlight Hearts

He held them out to me, maybe in an attempt to include me in the conversation.I hesitated for a second, then took them.Compared to the peace lily Duncan had given me, Lorenzo was… He didn’t compare at all.I wondered how big he was—the plant him—to make a person-shaped flower.

“Thank you.We’ll…we’ll compost these.”I slid the spoons into my jacket pocket.

Soyer raised his eyebrow at me.

“That’s what they’re for,” Lorenzo said.He grinned.“After you use them to eat with, of course.”

“Have a good evening, Lorenzo,” Soyer said, and put his arm around me.

We walked out of the bodega, and out of the corner of my eye, I spotted something familiar: animal crackers.A cold shiver ran down my spine.

“Are you all right?”Soyer asked as he held the passenger door for me.

The crackers had done nothing, they were just one thing that had stuck in my memory.I had to let it go.

“It’s just the cold.”

I took the bag with the ice cream from him when he handed it to me, and as he went around the car, I checked my watch.I didn’t want this day to end in something that was better forgotten.

Soyer sighed when he closed the apartment door behind us.“We should’ve kept the table for another day.”

“Why?Do you think we should’ve hosted another party today?”

Soyer turned and went for my zipper while I was still busy pulling off my gloves.

“No, I just thought that it might be nice to have you on the table.”He had a hungry look in his eyes.“You look surprised.Sating a lover is what tables are made for.That you can also eat from them is a side benefit.”

“I’m not surprised.I understand now.”I held up the bunny while he took my jacket.“Your rampant libido?It’s a bunny’s libido.This is perfect for you.”

He made a face at me.“I was nice, my heart.I tried to help you with your crane game, because clearly, you really needed it.”

I shook the bunny at him.“They’re rigged.This is proof they’re rigged.Do you think we should call him Cymbal?So he fits in with Oboe.”

“Sure.”He went to the walk-in closet.It was the same routine as most nights when we got home, but something was different.He was watching me, yes, but whether something had changed in me or in him, whether anything had changed outside of my imagination at all, I couldn’t know for certain.

“Soyer, why’s your hallway closet so big and empty?”

“All the better to keep your jacket,” he said.

I blinked.“And why are your eyes so big, Soyer?”

He walked toward me and brushed his knuckles over my cheek.“All the better to see you with, my heart.”

My bottom lip trembled.“Will you…fuck me?Now?”It came out in a whisper, but I’d said it, had asked for it.I liked myself better for that.

He froze, his gaze intense.“Why?”

“It can’t have been your best birthday.I won’t believe that.I want…I want to be close to you.I want you to feel good.”

“That’s not enough of a reason, my heart.”

“Then…I want you close.I want to feel you.And I want to feel that you’re happy.You always ask me, but will you please show me that you’re happy too?”

His jaw tensed, but he stayed calm.“That’s a convoluted reason, Amory.”

“I guess.I don’t know how to say it better, but I want this.Isn’t it enough that I want this, that I want to see your face when you’re inside me, when you come inside me?”

“I can work with that.”He sighed, looking at the place where the table had been.“It really is too bad.Kitchen island?”