Page 24 of Mending Hearts at the Cornish Country Hospital (The Cornish Country Hospital #6)

‘How do you know how old I am?’ She narrowed her eyes for a moment, as if him knowing that kind of information made her uneasy for some reason, and he wished he hadn’t said it.

It made him feel as if any kind of exchange between them that didn’t centre around Teddie was off limits, but surely that couldn’t be true.

They’d shared a lot about their lives during their meet ups, and yet suddenly it felt as though the rules might be changing.

Drew was almost tempted to ask Eden if she could define the rules for him, because it would make him more comfortable, except he knew he wasn’t supposed to ask questions like that.

He was supposed to just be able to pick up on the trajectory of a conversation, or the dynamics of a relationship, without having them spelt out to him.

The trouble was, autism didn’t work like that, at least not for Drew.

‘You said that your thirtieth birthday was possibly the saddest milestone birthday anyone has ever had.’ Drew shrugged. ‘And that at least your mum had bought you a cake for your next birthday, now that you’re home again.’

‘I’d forgotten I’d told you that. It’s just I wondered if…’ Eden shook her head, seeming to answer her own question before she’d even asked it. ‘It doesn’t matter; I’m being silly.’

‘You thought I’d been looking you up on the hospital system?

’ Drew could see in her eyes that he was right.

Eden told him that she didn’t have social media accounts because of Jesse.

She’d said her ex could find her if he really wanted to, but that she didn’t want to give him any motivation to try.

If she was out of sight, she might be out of mind.

It was obvious how worried she was about what might happen if Jesse did decide to find her, and that she might not be able to stop him from seeing Teddie.

After all, he hadn’t committed any crimes as far as social services were concerned.

She’d told Drew there was a chance she might be able to make a case for coercive control, but it would be hard to prove and there was no way of knowing what a court would decide.

Drew could understand why that made social media feel like an unnecessary risk, which could give Jesse access to the life Eden was living now, so she knew he wouldn’t have been able to look up the details of her age that way.

He tried not to feel hurt that she’d assumed the worst of him, looking up private information about her in the hospital’s online records.

He understood how hard it was for her to trust anyone and he had to accept that sometimes she might doubt him too.

‘I’m sorry.’ Eden cast her eyes down towards the floor for a moment before looking up again, giving him a half smile. ‘I forget just how much stuff I’ve told you. Like I said before, I seem to have found myself an unpaid therapist, whether you like it or not.’

‘I like it.’ He wasn’t sure whether it was a good idea to admit that, but seeing as he had no idea what the rules of their interactions were supposed to be, all he could do was fall back on what felt safest and tell the truth.

‘I’m glad, because I like it too.’

It was almost as if Drew could feel Gwen standing next to him, whispering in his ear that now was exactly the right moment to ask Eden if she’d like to go out with him some time, just the two of them, but he couldn’t seem to get his mouth to form the words.

In the end, it was Eden who broke the silence.

‘Apparently there are some newborn calves in the barn. Maybe we could take Teddie over to have a look at them?’

‘Actually that’s why I suggested coming here.

’ Drew was still second-guessing the boundaries of their conversation, but she’d asked for any insight he might be able to give her about growing up with autism, and what he was about to say fell into that category.

‘My speech wasn’t delayed in the same way Teddie’s is, but for a long time I found it difficult to get people to understand what I was saying.

Sounds were easier to connect with than words, I liked the repetition of them.

There was this book my mother read me, about monkeys.

I must have only been about four or five, and she asked me what sound a monkey made.

I can still remember the feel of the ooh ooh ooh sound and I couldn’t seem to stop doing it.

I don’t know if it was because of how it made me feel, or the fact that my mother understood the sound I was making so much more easily than she did some of my words when I spoke.

I just wondered if it might help Teddie too.

Focusing on making sounds that mean something, like the noise that cows make, might work better than trying to push him towards saying actual words…

Sorry, no, push is the wrong word, I wasn’t saying that’s what you’re doing. ’

Drew was tying himself up in knots and he was beginning to wish he hadn’t said anything at all, but then Eden put a hand on his arm.

‘It’s okay, I know exactly what you mean.

I want him to speak, of course I do, and I can see how frustrated it makes him not being able to tell me what he needs.

Right now him speaking seems impossible, but I can see how him being able to repeat the sound an animal makes in response to a question could be a bridge between understanding and language. And I think you might be a genius.’

Drew couldn’t help smiling at Eden’s words.

He was still getting used to someone having that much of an effect on him.

He might not have received much praise from his parents, but he’d had plenty about his work over the years.

This was different though, this was personal, and it meant far more when it came from Eden than from anyone else.

Even so, he couldn’t just accept the compliment and say thanks, it would have made him feel far too awkward.

So he made light of it to take the focus off himself, the way he always did.

‘I’d like to pretend this is a new breakthrough that’s all my idea, and that I’m some kind of expert on the best methods of communication, but there’s a reason I chose to work with patients who are already dead. ’

For a moment they just looked at each other and then they both started to laugh, harder than Drew could remember laughing in a very long time.

He could have been disappointed that he hadn’t found a way to take Gwen’s advice and ask Eden out, but he decided to focus on the positives instead and feel grateful for having spent the afternoon with her and Teddie.

It felt amazing to have met someone who still seemed to like him, even when he was being wholly and unapologetically himself.

* * *

‘I need some one-on-one bonding time with Teddie before I go back to the States to pack stuff up and tie up the final loose ends.’ Felix came into the kitchen where Eden was stacking the dishwasher.

They’d had dinner together, just the two of them.

Their parents were out with friends at a restaurant in Padstow, and Teddie was already in bed.

‘I’m sure Teddie would like some one-on-one time with his uncle too. When were you thinking of?’

‘Saturday afternoon and into the evening.’ Felix gave her a knowing look. ‘A little birdy tells me you’ve been invited to a party, but you’re not going because with Mum and Dad away with their golfing buddies, you’ve got no one to look after Teddie.’

‘Who told you that?’ She’d have bet her money on Gwen passing that information on to their mother, when they were at book club together, and it getting back to Felix that way, but he clearly wasn’t giving up his source.

‘It doesn’t matter who I heard it from, what matters is that you should be going. You told me you wanted to make a life for yourself back here, for you and for Teddie, and that you want to make new friends. What better way is there to turn colleagues into friends than socialising together?’

‘In my experience it can go the other way.’ She wrinkled her nose, hoping it might be enough to make Felix back off, but he knew her too well.

‘Yes, but you won’t know until you try.’

‘I suppose I could go to the party, although the idea would have been much more appealing if I could have taken you with me. Amy said I could bring you along and I hate going to things like that on my own.’ Eden wasn’t just making excuses any more.

The idea of trying to force her way into conversation between groups of existing friends did make her cringe, but standing on her own with a drink in hand wasn’t exactly appealing either.

A big part of her knew it wouldn’t be like that, because of how friendly the team were, and the fact that Meg and Eve were fairly new too, but she still didn’t like the idea of going alone.

‘So don’t go on your own. Take Drew with you.’

‘I can’t do that.’ She was shaking her head so hard it hurt.

Felix could read her like a book and if she gave any indication of how much her feelings for Drew had grown, he’d pounce on that and tell her that she needed to follow her heart.

She hadn’t meant to let Drew get under her skin as much as he had, because she’d had no intention whatsoever of developing feelings for someone, but she hadn’t been able to help it.

Watching him with Teddie had made it inevitable.

The bond between them, and her little boy’s total trust in Drew, was enough to convince her that she could trust her instincts about him.

When he’d taken Teddie to see the cows, with the hope that repeating the mooing sound might help her son’s language development, he’d shown Eden just how well he understood Teddie and how much he wanted to be a part of making a difference to his life.

He had insights and ways of connecting with Teddie that she didn’t possess.

It wasn’t that it superseded her bond with her son in any way, that was unique and incredibly special in its own right.

It was more like they were part of a team, each with their own strengths, and both of them able to enrich Teddie’s life more together than they could alone.

All of those things deepened the feelings she had for Drew even further.

Eden loved having him as a part of both of their lives, and she could no longer pretend that she didn’t want him to play an even bigger role.

But the self-doubt that Jesse had fostered in her was still there in so many senses.

She might be able to trust her gut about Drew being a good guy, but she still couldn’t rely of her instincts when it came to interpreting how he felt about her.

She knew her brother wouldn’t see it that way, though, even before he answered.

‘I don’t see why not, if you’ve been told you can take a plus one.’

‘I didn’t say I couldn’t take him with me, but I’d have to ask him first. That’s the part I can’t do.

I’d be mortified if he said no.’ Eden shook her head again.

She couldn’t risk it; she didn’t want to lose Drew’s friendship or his support, and she didn’t want Teddie to lose the bond he’d built with him either.

It wasn’t worth it, not just so she’d have company to a party she knew would be Drew’s idea of hell anyway.

‘Yes, you can ask him, because you, my darling little sister, can do anything you put your mind to. You got yourself and Teddie out of an abusive relationship, and before that you carried on working and kept a roof over your heads through all the years of hell Jesse put you through. Asking Drew out is nothing in comparison and, from what I’ve heard, he’s far too nice a guy to make a big thing out of it even if he decides it’s not something he wants to do. ’

‘I don’t think it’s his kind of thing.’

‘But what if it is? I can tell you like him and don’t even try to tell me I’ve got that wrong, because I know you far too well.

’ Felix didn’t break eye contact. ‘Just ask him, Eddie, I think you’ll be glad you did.

But, if it all goes horribly wrong, I promise to be the one who takes Mum out for her next three Mother’s Day lunches, on my own if necessary, without a single complaint. ’

‘How can I turn down a deal like that?’ Laughing, Eden shook her head. She knew Felix wouldn’t give up until she’d at least agreed to try, and maybe he was right, she might just end up being glad that she did.