Page 38 of Meeting Me, Loving You (Hearts of Maple Lake #1)

CAMERON

M y class just finished, and students shuffle out the door while several head to the front to place their assignments on my desk.

I smile and nod at each, reminding them to study over the weekend.

The school year ends in only two weeks, and the kids can feel it coming to a halt.

There’s a new energy in the room as students anticipate their summer fun, complete with sleeping in, family vacations, and no homework.

I’m reminded that I promised Jules I’d study with her this weekend, and I rub my temples.

“Wasn’t it, Cameron?” I forgot Mrs. Simons was in the room.

I turn to her and remember she was talking about Jules’ accident.

“Yes. It was awful.” I hate to remember the day of the accident. I’ve done a pretty good job of compartmentalizing that day in a box of all my other unwanted memories, but I can’t keep it contained when others keep opening it up. It’s a crack I’d rather glue shut and forget about.

Mrs. Simons doesn’t seem to notice my unease around the subject .

“It was a blessing you were with her that day,” she says gently.

I turn my back to her and squeeze my eyes shut, fisting my hands at my sides. “It was my fault she was there in the first place.”

“What?”

I turn to her. “She wouldn’t have gotten hurt if I hadn’t brought her biking in the first place. This whole list of activities wasn’t a good idea from the start.”

The room is silent now that all the students have left, and Mrs. Simons’ brows scrunch in concern.

“Is that what you think, Cameron? That her accident was really your fault?”

“I know it was. She was fine before I started giving her ideas of adventure and pulling her out of her bubble. Jules was safer before I showed up at all.” My hands find the edge of my desk and I lean on it for support, feeling drained.

The sweet art teacher steps a little closer, keeping the desk between us.

“Cameron, honey. You didn’t do anything to hurt that girl. She has been made better because of you. The bicycle accident was unfortunate, but it wasn’t at all your fault. She could have just as likely fallen down the steps at her own apartment.”

I frown at her.

“What I’m saying,” she continues, “is you can’t keep her safe from everything. Life gets in the way, and it gets messy. People get hurt. But you’ve been everything she’s needed these past few months. We’ve all seen a change in our Juliet, and that’s all thanks to you.”

My chest relaxes from her encouraging words.

“Thank you,” I manage to say.

I meet her eyes, and the grey in them looks a little more blue today due to the shade of her blue dress .

“Don’t get yourself down because someone you love experienced a tragedy.

Allow yourself to come beside them and help them up.

Because what you have to offer, Cameron, is more than just friendship to Juliet.

” Her brow arches. “I’ve seen the way you two look at each other, even if you don’t seem to notice it yourselves. ”

My pulse picks up as I break our gaze and I sort the stack of papers on my desk.

“We’re just friends, Francine. Nothing else.”

“Mhm,” she hums, walking to the door. “You keep telling yourself that, Mr. Dunne. But sooner or later, you’ll realize it isn’t true.”

As she walks out the door and the next class of students begins filing into the room, I’m left wondering if Mrs. Simons could have it all wrong.

As much as I want Jules to reciprocate my feelings, I know one day she’ll see me as a fraud and realize I’m not the man she wants.

My demeaning parents have left their dent on my soul, and I’m not sure anything can straighten it out. Not even her.

Almost two weeks later, a day before school gets out for the summer, I text Jules about the tourist list and my choice to discontinue the activities.

I’ve been thinking we should stop working through the tourist list.

Jules

What? Why?

It just doesn’t seem like a great idea anymore.

Jules

But we haven’t gotten to the summer activities yet.

I know, but you’ve been through a lot and you need to keep resting.

Jules

I’m fine, Cam. It’s been weeks since the accident, and I’m basically feeling normal again. Did you forget I went back to work this week?

I had forgotten, actually.

I just think it’s best that you rest when you can. You shouldn’t have to follow my tourist list anymore. From now on, you’re no longer bound by our tourist/study deal.

Jules

Are you firing me from our field trips?

Firing doesn’t seem like the right word. But yes.

Jules

I don’t accept.

You don’t accept?

Jules

Nope. I’m finishing the tourist list with you. We still have summer and autumn, and I’m not missing out because of whatever real reason you’re hiding from me.

I sigh and rub a hand down my face. She’s not making this easy.

Fine. But we’re no longer rafting down the river as was planned. We’ll take the rowboat out on the lake and fish.

Jules

Great. School gets out for the summer soon, right?

Tomorrow is the last day.

Jules

Perfect, we’ll go Saturday! I’ve been dying to get outside and enjoy the sunshine. I’ll bring food.

I smile. It’s typical Jules, begging to be anywhere warm. I laugh, thinking about last winter when I found her sitting in the snowbank outside of Le Fou, a frozen angel from my dreams.

You’ll disappoint her.

In a flash, my smile turns to frustration. No matter how hard I try, no matter how far I run from that voice in my head, I can’t get away from it as it tells me I’m not enough .