Page 36

"Not to mention that my body...my body stops being mine whenever you're near. Always reacting to you so strangely, so intensely."

"That is because you are attracted to me." He intoned bluntly .

She continued anyway, "Then, today... I have no idea the exact detail of what happened but when you roared..." She swallowed, "When you roared...I was unable to hold myself. I've hidden in your bedroom but I was unable to stay hidden. It's like a force was pushing me to go to you..."

His face didn't change a bit, but a muscle twitched in his forehead.

"I caught a glimpse of your face before I threw myself at you. It was...the most savage look I've ever seen in my life. Very wild. But when I did that, I expected you to tear me apart...but you didn't."

"I would have." He stated matter-of-factly.

"But you didn't." She insisted, "You just...calmed." she added for lack of better words, "You turned all your focus on me and..." Her cheeks reddened further. Her jaws were sore, a reminder of what happened.

He said nothing.

"Then, Alphose said something. He hasn't mated before so he has no idea what I was supposed to do for you." She finished then, looking him in the eyes.

"Shit." He cursed then.

"I'm your mate, aren't I?" She asked then, her heart in her throat, beating wildly. "That is why all this is happening, right?"

The silence that followed that question was deafening. It stretched...and only lengthened.

Ismena waited him out patiently, her eyes never leaving his face.

"Yes." He said, at last, uncrossing his arms. He walked to the nearest window and looked out to the wilds that are the only view the window oversees .

Oh my God. She staggered back.

No matter how true she'd expected it to be, it didn't prepare her for his admission.

"Were you ever going to tell me?" She let out in a whisper, her throat dry like sandpaper.

"No."

It hurt. It wasn't supposed to, but it did. "Why?"

"Because I have no intentions of ever taking a mate. Not you or anybody else. I do not want a mate. I do not want a child." Each word was clipped and hard.

"Why?"

"I love my life the way it is."

"What about me? I'm going to die, Wolfariane. Your touch keeps me alive. I've felt better than I have in a long time and it is all because of you."

"Alphose returned today from New York with your pills. The next time he wakes, I will get the information about where the pills are and give them to you."

"Those pills are not going to keep me alive, Wolfariane. I need to stay alive! Please, if there is a way for me to stay alive, can't you help me?" She asked, suddenly desperate when it finally dawned on her that she can have real hope...she can hold onto real hope...!

This man can make her live! "I don't want to die! Please, I don' t want to die!"

He whirled around and looked her in the eyes then, "I am not mating with you, Ismena. Not even to save your own life." He said in that calm, deadly tone of his.

This time around, it hurt more than the very first time.

Her heart felt like a train was running over it so ruthlessly. Her eyes watered, which she didn't expect.

When she blinked and felt the tears, it made her angry.

"Do you hate humans that much? Do you hate me that much?" She whispered, swallowed to wet her dry throat.

A muscle ticked in his jaw. He turned away from her and faced the window again, "Do you have any idea that I almost killed you today?"

"When I threw myself on yo—"

"Not only that time. I was the 'lion' that gave you a chase." He revealed then, "You remember, don't you?"

How can she ever forget? Just the remember has the fear creeping up her spine. And he just said...

"That was you?" She asked disbelievingly, her eyes wide.

"Yes." He stated firmly, "Alphose was the other 'lion' that followed but he wasn't trying to attack you, instead, he was trying to stop me from killing you."

"You were g-going to k-kill me?" She swallowed again.

"I was going to shred you to pieces, eat your flesh and chew on your bone for days to come." He said, bluntly .

"Oh, God..." How can he say something like that to her? Instinctively, she took a step back, away from him.

"That was the instinct I had. That was the instinct I was riding on.

If I had caught you...if Alphose hadn't stopped me.

.." He paused and shook his head, "I hate humans, Ismena.

It is so deep, I do not know where my hatred ended and the part of me that is a mountain lion's own began.

It is my hate for your kind that feeds the hate and the rage of that part of me. I can't un-hate your kind."

"Today, if I had caught you in the form of the mountain lion, I would have killed you in the most horrible way.

Alphose was stopping me and I hurt him too, just to get to you.

Not only can I not mate you, but having sexual intimacies with you will also be very dangerous for you because I have a part of me that loathes everything you are. "

The tears were threatening again, but Ismena blinked them back so hard.

God, she does not want to cry for this. She does not want to cry for this tragedy that is her life. At least, not here.

"I heard the things you went through—"

"You heard nothing, Ismena." He whirled around and faced her again. Anger filled his blue eyes, "You heard nothing. You have no idea what I went through...what my people went through...what the wolf-clan went through..." His eyes darkened, "You have no idea what Nalaila went through."

The fact that he called that woman's name wasn't helping her at all.

"She's the main reason you are being this way, right? She is the main reason you don't want to be with me...not even to save my life, right?" Please, say no.

"Yes." He didn't bait an eyelash .

Jealousy and pain fixed together, burning through Ismena's chest like an acid. The room was suddenly suffocating for her, she needed to leave this place. She needed to breathe...away from here.

It's suddenly too much. Being chased by a huge lion. Almost meeting death twice today. Being rejected so blatantly. Being told so bluntly that the rejection is mainly because of his hate for her kind and another woman. It was too much.

It was becoming hard to battle these tears, so she has to go away from here or she will embarrass herself.

She faced the door and walked towards it.

But at the door, she stopped and turned.

She can still feel him on her tongue, in her throat. She can still taste him, this man that hates everything she represents. This man that is her mate. This man that will not claim her because of another woman. This man that will not claim her, not even for her to live.

"I have been here in Naturiah for nine days, I have learned quite a lot about your people and your ways by being here. I have also learned that a potential mate who hasn't been claimed can be compatible to more than one unmated male, but whoever claims her first becomes her mate, right?"

Wolfariane turned around and looked at her. He has no idea where she was going with that. "Not in all cases, but yes. Sometimes, a potential mate's compatibility can match more than one, it depends on who she is most compatible with or which of them claims her first. Why?"

"I am dying, Wolfariane." She raised her chin proudly, "If I'm going to die, I still have a few more things in my list I'm going to explore before I die which includes 'Having A One-night-stand' and 'Having A Constant Fuck Buddy'.

Eline mentioned a club before, so I know for sure that Naturiah has a club. I am going to the club tonight. "

She faced the door then, "Who knows, I might find another changeling male who I'm compatible with, who I can start fucking and it'll keep me alive."

She paused, "But even if I don't find another compatible mate, it doesn't matter. I'm still going to fuck around and fulfill my list while I wait for my death. I'm going to the club tonight." With that, she walked out of the bedroom.