Page 31 of Malice: The Mate Games (Apocalypse #3)

Chapter

Twenty-Four

MERRI

M oving through cobra and back into downward dog, I breathed through the stretch down my tight hamstrings as I lifted my ass in the air and did my damndest to create a triangle with my body.

I hadn’t been as diligent with my weekly yoga practice since being abducted by the grump brigade.

And before you come at me, I know if I want to get better, I should be doing it every day.

I’m sorry that I’ve been a little distracted by the world ending.

And by all the sex... though, honestly, I’m not really sorry about that one.

I let out an exaggerated exhale to reclaim my own attention—sort of the way you might clear your throat when trying to get someone’s attention behind the counter when they’re clearly ignoring you, except in this case, I’m the rude counter girl in question, and it’s my mental health I’m ignoring.

My thoughts had been getting the better of me all afternoon, thus the yoga. I was attempting to find my zen. So far, it wasn’t working.

Yoga was peaceful.

Yoga was calming.

Yoga was fucking hard.

It should have pulled my focus from the heavy things weighing on me.

But with each measured breath, each pose, each pull of my muscles, I didn’t find the meditative ease I was searching for.

Nope. I was assaulted by racing thoughts.

Pregnancy. Apocalypse. Lucifer. Demons. Freaking lightning strikes and cute weirdos in my dreams. I’d been so busy racing from one crisis to the next that I hadn’t had time to dwell on any of them.

Until now, apparently.

I guess the rare moment of solitude was the perfect time for it all to come crashing down and send me on one hell of a panic spiral.

Which, frankly, I just did not have the time for.

Because the world was still ending, no matter what I thought about it.

And I’d much rather deal with it head-on than metaphorically curled up in the fetal position.

“Focus, Meredith,” I chastised myself as I stood tall in mountain pose before swan-diving into a terrible forward fold.

Every pang of discomfort pulled my focus and let more thoughts in.

Lilith’s continued silence. Asher and the resistance he was apparently leading. Whether the horsemen had been successful. Whether another demon attack was incoming. If Andi and Cole were still alive.

“Fuck it,” I grumbled before settling myself on the plush carpet and getting into a cross-legged position. If yoga wasn’t working, maybe some meditation would.

Shoving all the intrusive thoughts out of my mind, I focused instead on counting my breaths.

I pictured each inhale filling the now empty space in my mind, cleansing and purifying, while each exhale would send the thoughts further away.

It wasn’t a perfect metaphor, but it was working better than yoga.

The quiet room afforded me tranquility, my breaths now soft and slow rather than loud and purposeful. In their place, I heard the wind in the trees outside, the leaves rustling, and the gentle crunch of gravel under someone’s feet.

“There you are, love. I’ve been missing you.” A voice I hadn’t heard for the better part of a week floated through my head.

“Luc?” I whispered, unable to open my eyes to see if he was really there.

A tickle at my ear preceded his crooned response. “I love the sound of my name on your lips.”

I tried to turn my head, but I couldn’t get my body to respond. I knew I wasn’t asleep. I could feel myself sitting in the middle of my room, my tailbone a little sore from the lack of padding beneath it and my legs and arms heavy in their resting position, but I couldn’t move.

“Why can’t I see you? Am I dreaming?”

“Just a little daydream. About me, as it should be. You must’ve missed me too. Me and all the fun we have together.” Fingers brushed my throat and trailed down until they traced my collarbone. “It’s been ages since our last chat. What have you been up to?”

“Oh, you know, just trying to survive the end of the world. No big deal.”

“With your four guardians keeping you sequestered like a princess in a tower, I’m sure that hasn’t been so hard.”

Memories of the demon attack whipped through my mind. “You’d be surprised.”

“Your mind is buzzing with stressful energy, darling.”

“What can I say? It’s a stressful time.”

Warm breath, followed by soft lips on my neck, made me shiver. Damn, my fantasies were good.

“You know how to decompress, don’t you? Release some of that oxytocin your body craves.”

An orgasm would be pretty nice right now. Sometimes a girl just needed to take care of herself.

What happened to the meditation, Merri?

As soon as the thought registered, it dissipated, sort of like ink in water.

“I guess I could be persuaded,” I murmured as strong fingers worked at the knots in my neck and shoulders. Everything felt so real, I’d have sworn Luc was in the room with me. But that was impossible. He was a creation of my imagination. A beautiful one.

“Let me have you, love. I’ll make you feel so good you’ll forget all your troubles.” Teeth sank into my earlobe, the bright pain making me yelp in surprise, but a flood of arousal followed.

“Mmm, Luc.” It was all I could do to get the soft moan out.

I expected another kiss or caress, but instead a hard shove tipped me backwards. My eyes snapped open as I caught myself before I fell. Luc was gone, my daydream rudely interrupted, and a very familiar shadow man loomed over me.

“Grim! What the hell was that for?”

Grim

I sat in the morning room with my chair facing the large windows, but I wasn’t watching the world outside.

I was focused on what my shadow saw: Merri meditating in her room, her eyes closed, hair piled on her head in a messy bun, shoulders tense even though she was attempting to harness inner peace.

I’d taken to watching over her whenever she was alone, telling myself it was for her own good, but that wasn’t entirely true.

She had become something I craved. I knew my obsession with her was bordering on unhealthy, if it wasn’t fully there already.

But I couldn’t find it in myself to care.

Merri was mine. Mine to watch over. Mine to protect. Mine to... well.

A change in her breathing alerted me that all was not as serene as it appeared, though it wasn’t until she started talking to herself that I realized something was very wrong. The odd phrase here and there could be explained away, but she was holding an entire one-sided conversation.

“It’s a stressful time . . . I guess I could be persuaded . . . Mmm, Luc.”

That last one got my back up. Luc?

Tensing in my chair, I sent my shadow out from the corner where he’d been lurking and used him to jolt her out of whatever trance she was caught in. I held on to the connection with him, ensuring I’d miss nothing while summoning the power I’d need to teleport to her room.

Merri fell backward from the power of the shove but caught herself before she could make contact with the ground. Her eyes snapped open, a cross look on her face as she registered my shadow form. “Grim! What the hell was that for?”

She hadn’t even finished speaking before I materialized in front of my shadow, our twin visions momentarily superimposing before solidifying into one. Glowering down at her, I snarled, “Who the fuck is Luc?”

Merri blinked up at me, her nose wrinkling in confusion. “Huh?”

“You heard me. Now answer the fucking question.”

She got to her feet, cheeks flushed with embarrassment. “No.”

“What was that?” The way my palm itched to redden her arse for her defiance had me gritting out the words.

“I don’t want to tell you about my personal fantasies.”

The room dimmed as shadows burst out of me, the dark growl of my voice betraying exactly what I thought about her fantasizing about other men. “There are only four men you should be fantasizing about, wildflower. Luc isn’t one of them. Tell me.”

If she was impressed by my little display of power, she didn’t show it. Instead, she shrugged before sitting on her bed. “He’s just someone I dream about.”

A harsh laugh escaped me. “You dream about someone named Luc and didn’t think that was relevant information to share with the men protecting you?”

“He’s not real. He’s my subconscious.”

“You cannot possibly be that stupid.”

She reeled back as if I’d slapped her. “Excuse me?”

“What do you think Luc is short for, Merri?”

“Lucas?”

“Try again.”

“Lucian?”

I pinched the bridge of my nose. “No, Merri. Lucifer. Luc is short for Lucifer . You know, the creature scouring the earth for you. The one man who cannot find you, but will stop at nothing until he does. The one who wants to use you and your body to end the fucking world.”

There was not a doubt in my mind that I had the right of it. Chaos had taught me long ago true coincidence was rare to the point of nonexistence. The chances of Merri having innocent, totally unrelated to our current situation dreams about a man named Luc? Impossible.

She paled, mouth dropping open. “I... but... how could he find me in my dreams? He’s not an incubus.”

“I don’t know, but I also have no doubt he’s figured out a way. How long have you been dreaming of him?” Every word was like a punch to the gut. We’d failed her, and we hadn’t even known it.

“A few days after you took me.”

Blinding rage nearly swallowed me whole as a new, terrifying thought gripped me. “Has he fucked you in your dreams?”

“Wh-what? No! No, of course not.”

I glared at her, silently willing her to tell me the truth if she was trying to hide it from me.

“The only fucking that’s been happening is with you four. I swear.”

It took several moments before I could relax enough to release the breath I’d been holding.

All this time, he’d been right under our noses, and we’d had no idea.

But then, he was Lucifer, a master of all things deceit and trickery.

We should have realized he’d find a way.

We should have... I blew out a breath and hung my head.

It didn’t matter what we should have done; the facts wouldn’t change. Lucifer had gotten to her.

“I don’t see why you’re so upset. It was just a daydream?—”

My gaze snapped back to hers. “Just a daydream? Come on, Merri. You know better than that. Even if it was something as innocuous as a dream, you know exactly how real and dangerous those can be. But setting all that aside, what happened here wasn’t just anything. You were in a trance, Merri.”

“No,” she said, shaking her head. “My mind had just wandered while I was meditating...”

“You were talking and completely unaware of your surroundings. He had you completely in his thrall.”

She opened her mouth to deny it but couldn’t.

“What happens next time if one of us isn’t there to pull you out? Or worse, if he tricks you into giving him the very thing he needs.”

“He won’t.”

“You moaned his name.” I hated how hurt I sounded, but I couldn’t disguise the way that made me feel.

Guilt flashed across her face, and I knew my suspicions were correct. He’d been trying to seduce her. More than that, he’d been well on his way to succeeding.

She shrugged helplessly. “He told me it would relax me. I thought I was alone. You stopped him from getting anywhere close, though.” Silence stretched between us for a beat before she tentatively asked, “Are we going to talk about why you keep spying on me?”

The last thing happening right now was me admitting to my obsession. Especially when it was the thing that just saved her.

“It’s a good thing I was, wasn’t it?”

She looked down at her knees, hands clasped between them.

I hated to see my courageous and defiant wildflower’s spirit so wilted, but not as much as I hated the thought that we’d left her in harm’s way. “These dreams with him cannot continue.”

Big blue eyes locked onto mine. “I don’t know how to keep him out.”

Neither did I. But there was one horseman who specialized in exactly that, and he’d clearly been neglecting his curriculum.

“Come with me.”

“Where are we going?”

“To talk to Malice.”