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Story: Locke (SBMC South Carolina)
Kiki
“Are you sure this is what you want to do? You don’t have to do this,” my mom asks me for the hundredth time now. I know I don’t have to do this. I don’t have to do anything I don’t want to do, and that includes staying with her. My mom and I have never really gotten along. It was always a struggle to be around her, and it isn’t any different now.
“Yeah, I know what I’m doing, Mom. I’ll be fine.”
“After everything you went through, that’s the first place you want to go.” She shakes her head. I knew I shouldn’t have asked her to pick me up from the airport or for a ride to the clubhouse, for that matter, but I wanted to see if she’d changed at all over the last two years. She hasn’t.
“It’s home,” I remind her.
“It’s his home. Not yours, Kiki.”
“Hodge is there.”
“He shouldn’t be.”
“But he is, and he’s still my brother. Besides, Gunner is the only father I’ve known.” She huffs out a breath, knowing I’m right. Gunner isn’t my real dad. Who is? Well, that’s up for debate. Mom never told me, and to be honest, I never cared. I was taken care of and loved by Gunner, and that’s all that mattered to me. He made me feel like I was his own, and he kept me in my place and grounded. I love him for that.
“Let’s not start that again,” she snaps at me.
“What do you want me to do? Stay with you?” I snort a laugh because mom can’t even keep her own life on track, let alone mine.
“What are you going to do there? Work at the club?”
“Maybe. I’m not stripping, just serving drinks.”
“That’s how they all get started, Kiki.” Now, I roll my eyes. She would know. She’s stripped, served, and whored herself out to any man who would look her way or throw her a twenty. I know I shouldn’t judge my mom, but it’s hard not to. She’s always talking down to me and making me feel like shit for the mistakes I’ve made.
“Can we just not do this today? I just want to get to the clubhouse and relax for a while.”
“Fine. Have it your way, Kiki, but don’t come crying to me when they fuck you over. And you know they will.”
“Why would they? Why would they do that to me?” I ask, turning my head to look at her at her. She pulls her eyes from the road to look at me for a brief second before turning back.
“That’s how they are. They turn their back on you.”
“Gunner has never turned his back on me. Not once. Why are you like this?” Now exasperated by the whole talk. I just want to ride home in silence.
“Like what? He turned his back on me, Kiki. Isn’t that proof enough?”
“Are you serious? You can’t be serious right now. You were the one out fucking half the county, mom. Don’t blame this on him.”
“You don’t know what was going on.”
“Oh, do tell. Please. I’d love to hear this story coming from you.”
“Why do you only believe what Gunner tells you?”
“Because Gunner, unlike you, has never lied to me. He’s never held the truth from me. He’s always been honest with everything. You, on the other hand, hide everything. Like who my dad is.”
“That’s what you’re worried about? You really care who your dad is?”
“No, not anymore. I used to care, but that was a long time ago. Gunner is my dad. He’s always been my dad and always will be.”
“Fine. If that’s the way you want things, fine.” She stops talking, and I’m thankful for that. I don’t want to hear anything else from her. I don’t want to hear her sob stories, and I sure as hell don’t want to hear her lies.
The rest of the ride to the clubhouse is silent, thank God. We pull up to the gate, and my heart leaps a little. It’s been two years since I’ve been here. Two long years since I’ve seen Gunner or my brother Hodge. Two years of running with another MC I had no business being with.
I take a deep breath as mom presses the button on the intercom. I hear a voice I don’t recognize, and my heart thunders in my chest.
“I’m here for Gunner. It’s Val.” The man opens the gates, and my mom pulls the car through. I fidget with my hands in my lap when she cuts her eyes at me.
“I don’t know why you’re so nervous.”
“It’s been a long time.”
“And? Stop acting like a child,” she snaps at me. I ignore her as usual and watch the gravel in front of me until the clubhouse comes into view. That’s when I see Gunner and Hodge. They’re waiting outside for me.
The smile on my face couldn’t get any bigger and as the car comes to a stop, I leap out and rush toward them. I throw myself into Gunner’s arms and he wraps his around me tightly.
“Missed you, Darlin’. Missed you somethin’ bad.”
“I missed you too, Dad.”
“God, I’m so glad to hear you call me that. Let me look at you,” he says as he pulls back and takes me in. He smiles and shakes his head before pulling me back into his arms.
“You look good. I’m glad you’re okay.”
“I am. I’m just glad to be back here,” I tell him truthfully.
“I’m glad you’re back too.”
“What about me?” I hear Hodge ask. I laugh and pull away from Gunner before Hodge pulls me into his arms.
“Missed you, Sis. Been way too long.”
“I’ve missed you so much, Hodge.” Tears I’d been holding back begin to leak down my cheeks when he pulls back and reaches up to wipe them away.
“Everything’s good now. You’re home.”
“I’m home.”
“Val.” I hear Gunner call my mom’s name and turn to look at the two of them.
“Nice to see you, Gunner.”
“You too. You’re lookin’ good.”
“Don’t try flattery. It doesn’t work with me.”
“Fine. You look like shit. Still hittin’ that pipe?”
“You still doing illegal shit?” she asks in response.
“Every day, darlin’. Every damn day.”
“Yeah, well, I need to go. Come get her shit,” she tells him before looking over at me briefly. Gunner chuckles and walks toward the car, grabbing my bags out of the back before setting them on the ground and watching her climb back in.
“She’s not changed a bit,” Hodge says.
“Not at all. She made sure to tell me how wrong I was to come here and not stay with her.”
“Who the hell would want to stay with her? She’s a fuckin’ train wreck.”
“Exactly. God, I’ve missed you,” I tell him once more. He wraps his arm around me and pulls me into his side.
“I missed you too. Things are only gonna get better for you now.”