Page 38 of Let It Snow (Eden’s Omegaverse #7)

It breaks my heart, because I truly believed it was Snow. I suppose his whole family believed it too. But staying here would only mean more suffering for me.

Watching his brothers one by one find their True Mates, knowing that we would always be seen as the ‘imperfect couple’. His parents might look at us and think, "Snow glued himself to this omega when his real perfect mate could still be out there."

My brothers would think the same. Ragnar and Moon found their fated matches. They’d look at me with silent pity while their lives are full and happy, and mine isn’t. That shadow of imperfection would hang over me and Snow forever.

Maybe jealousy plays a part too, that ugly envy of everyone else getting what I want so badly.

I remember the prophecy Moon gave me:

"Follow Sun, and you will find happiness."

And Sun went to Iceland with Ragnar. Moon didn’t say follow the snow.

I have to give this a chance. I have to try to rebuild my life. I’m grateful to the Nolans for everything, but this is where our paths split. I won’t keep abusing their hospitality.

Tears stream down my face.

Fuck… I really liked him. He’s a sorcerer, just like me. A hylomancer and a rheomancer, what a pair. And we understood each other so well. I press my hands to my face and a sob breaks out of my chest.

Why can’t it be him?

We would be such a perfect couple, two mages with complementary powers who…

never planned to do anything with that power anyway.

Almost cute. It makes me laugh through my tears.

And yet, it was something that connected us.

Another thread. Even though he isn’t talkative, I could feel under the surface that we’d always get along.

And he’s so fucking attractive. Exactly my type.

And the sex… pure heaven.

But my fingers don’t stop. They keep clicking, and I find a flight to Reykjavík… tonight at eleven. What luck!

It’s three in the afternoon. I check availability, and, miracle, miracle, there’s one seat left. I grab it fast, adrenaline rushing through me. The decision is made.

But then…

Doubt claws at me. My body resists. What the hell am I doing? I know damn well I shouldn’t decide anything during heat recovery. Everyone says it: never make decisions in the crash, don’t do anything impulsive.

You feel like shit, you are not yourself!

Every omega learns that from the day we find out what we are. And it’s true. Because in this state, the world looks way darker than it really is.

But stubborn little me doesn’t care. I dig out an old backpack from the bottom drawer, I think it once belonged to Nathaniel. I throw in the essentials for the trip.

Then I take a shower to wash off the last traces of heat and… Snow’s scent. That’s the past now. I change, sling the backpack over my shoulder, and call an Uber.

It’ll be here in four minutes.

I jump down the ladder and slip across the garden, sticking to the shadows, feeling like a traitor.

I reach the driveway, but instead of opening the gate, I climb over it, keeping it shady. The moment my feet hit the ground on the other side, I hear someone running toward the gate.

It starts sliding open. Panic shoots through me, and I almost bolt, but I force myself to stay.

It’s Lake.

His eyes are wide. He stares at me in confusion, then his gaze drops to my backpack, and understanding hits.

"You’re leaving us…"

"Yes," I say, and everything about it feels utterly wrong.

"But how? Why? You can’t—" He cuts himself off and presses his hands to his mouth. His eyes shine with tears.

My own eyes burn too. I don’t want to break down in front of him, but it’s too late to take this back. I have to return to my parents in Iceland.

I need to clear my head, to figure out how to find my fated. Moon has those abilities. Maybe he can help me search, maybe I’ll ask him to dig into his visions?

"Where are you going?" Lake asks, his voice trembling.

"To Iceland. To my parents."

"What about Snow—"

"Snow isn’t my True Mate." Even saying it hurts. "I fooled myself all this time, hoping for some miracle, some mistake with the veradiol tests. I wanted it so badly." My words tumble out as tears slide down my face. "But we slept together, and the First Orgasm didn’t happen. No electric surge like what’s supposed to happen when True Mates connect in Joining. His suppressants don’t block it, they’re first-tier, mild, and I don’t take any at all, so the effect should have been there. " My voice shakes and cracks.

"But why? You had the First Touch effect! There's still a hole in our garden to prove it!"

"It was because of our magic. Two sorcerers came into contact."

Lake covers his face and… starts to sob. I feel like absolute garbage. I step forward and wrap my arms around him, holding him tight.

I whisper into his ear, "Thank you for everything you’ve given me, for the kindness and patience, for all of it.

You’re amazing. But my parents are fated mates, and my brothers found theirs too.

I believe I’ll find mine also. It wouldn’t be okay to give up and stop searching, and it wouldn’t be fair to Snow.

His perfect match is out there somewhere, waiting for him. "

"So Snow to you… so he’s not… you don’t…" Lake can’t even finish. The sobs tear out of him, making it hard to speak.

And weirdly, I feel no such block in my speech. No usual lump in my throat, no crushing pain, no strangled voice!

How strange… For the first time in a long time, I can speak freely; my mutism is gone.

What happened?

But I don’t think about it too long. I need him to understand.

"I really like him, Lake. We click so well, I was sure he was my perfect mate. I can practically read his thoughts, feel his energy, his moods. It all lined up. But it wasn’t true. Maybe we’re just High Mates. Maybe it can happen sometimes? But it’s not the same."

"You don’t believe you could build something with him anyway? Love him?" Lake’s voice is pleading.

His question cuts deep, because I ask myself the same thing. Am I really so messed up that I’d throw away something almost perfect for the vague chance at something flawless? Is the grass always greener somewhere else?

"I could. I could love him, easily, but…"

The rest sticks in my throat. There’s no excuse. Snow and I could be incredible, TMs or not. I know that.

And I’m still walking away. Like a bastard.

Now, there are two of us.

That’s when the Uber pulls into the driveway.

The driver leans out.

"Password: Summer?"

"Yes, that’s me."

Lake grabs my hand, his eyes begging.

"Please don’t do this. Please don’t leave. I can feel it, with my whole heart, that you two belong together. From the moment you came here, I knew you were the one for my son. It’s you. I swear it’s you."

I look away. For a second I hesitate. Then I ask him the question that matters to me most, the one I still don’t know the answer to.

"Do you know what Theo’s plans are for the baby?"

Lake stiffens slightly, almost imperceptibly. He stares at me for a moment, as if it’s slowly sinking in that my reasons for leaving aren’t just because we’re not True Mates. His face falls.

"Yes, I know. On the day he gives birth, Snow and I are going to the hospital to take the babies."

"Babies? Plural?"

I can’t believe what I’m hearing.

Lake swallows hard, and I realize how uncomfortable he is right now.

"Yes. Theo called me yesterday to tell us he’d been to an appointment. They’re twins."

A bitter laugh escapes me. "So he’s getting a ready-made family. Two kids right from the start…"

Lake looks away, clearly uneasy.

The Uber driver is starting to look impatient.

"Children… adopted children… are a blessing. We adopted Nathaniel—"

I cut him off. "Why doesn’t Theo want them?"

Lake lowers his head. "Theo’s husband, Tim Kellan, won the election yesterday. He’s a public figure now. They don’t want this to affect their image, the fact that Theo gave birth to another man’s children. So we decided to take the babies ourselves."

"So are you getting in or not?!" the Uber driver snaps.

I look back at Lake.

"It’s kind of you to take the babies, to give them a family. It’s a noble gesture. But I wouldn’t say the same about Theo. He’s giving up his own children?"

Lake speaks softly. "Theo and Tim already have five other kids. The youngest is just four years old, and their lives are about to change dramatically because of Tim’s political career…"

"Well, I wish them luck," I mutter bitterly. "And you too," I add, more softly now. "Once again, thank you for everything you’ve done for me. You’re truly… an incredible person… anyone would be lucky to have a dad-in-law like you," I blurt out, my voice breaking again.

Lake stays silent. Tears flow down his face. I turn and climb into the car as the Uber driver lets out an impatient sigh.

"We should go. Traffic to the airport is murder at this hour!" he grumbles.

I say nothing.

As we pull away, I look back and see Lake standing alone on the driveway, a slender, solitary figure.

Then it hits me, a thought that feels almost random: this one man has brought eight people into the world and adopted one more child. Where did he find so much love and kindness in his heart? What about me? Couldn’t I find it too?

My stomach tightens.

I want to be part of his family… so much. To have him close. Lake is truly amazing, and I genuinely wish him all the best.

And Snow too…

I spend the entire drive to the airport mostly crying. Why do I hurt myself so much? Why do I torture myself with this decision? Every mile that puts more distance between me and Snow feels like a metal wire stretching tighter inside me.

But still something nags at me.

Why was I able to speak so easily?

The pain has gone. My mutism has evaporated like a dense fog. During my talk with Lake I didn’t feel a single stab of pain or that choking pressure in my throat that used to grip me. It’s as if I’ve been healed.

On top of that, my mind feels completely clear. I remember everything.

The amnesia has finally lifted.