Page 30 of Lady of Starfire (Lady of Darkness #5)

But there was a cost, and Sorin, being who he was, was again trying to protect her.

But she did not need him to protect her.

Not because she thought she did not deserve protection.

That wasn’t it at all. She did not need to be protected from the consequences of her actions.

If he paid a cost to come back from death, then she had forced him to pay it.

She did not wish to be protected from that reality. She needed to face it, feel it.

“Tell me the price you paid.”

“You have enough guilt and burden to bear, Talwyn. There is no need to add to it.”

“I am not a child any longer, Sorin,” she replied, lifting her hands to brush back stray hair.

She scarcely felt the bite of the shackles.

“I was not a child when you … I blamed so many, but what I have become? That is not your fault. That is not Eliné’s fault.

It is no one’s fault but my own, and I wish to know what cost you have paid because of me. ”

Sorin studied her, seeing her in a way that no one else ever could.

Azrael may have known of her as a child, but she rarely interacted with the Earth Prince then.

Ashtine was her same age for all intents and purposes.

But Sorin? Sorin had been Eliné’s Second.

He had always been around. Seeing him in the Black Halls was as natural as seeing her aunt.

He would always know her in a way that others didn’t.

No matter how much they both changed, there would forever be some trace of Little Whirlwind and the Prince.

Whatever he was looking for, he must have found it, because Sorin finally spoke. His voice was low and quiet, as though he was trying to soften the blow he was about to deliver. “The cost was my magic.”

Talwyn lurched back from him. “What?”

She could say nothing else. Her brain could not form any other thought because she could not comprehend what he had just said.

“I no longer have my magic,” he repeated.

“I cannot summon fire. I cannot create portals. I cannot …” He pulled his hand from his pocket and held it up.

His left hand. Where a twin flame Mark should have been stark against his golden skin.

Only a gold band was there. “I cannot have a twin flame. I am mortal with an extended lifespan. That was the cost. To correct the balance.”

Talwyn Semiria sank to her knees and wept.

All those little things that had bothered her made sense now. The muted eye color. The thicker tunic. The offering of a cloak instead of his magic to warm her in the spring weather.

Tears streamed down her face, but she forced herself to look Sorin in the face when she rasped. “There is nothing I can say to make this right, Sorin, but I am so profoundly sorry for what you have lost because of me.”

And Sorin, perhaps one of the few she had wronged more than her own people, knelt before her. He took her hands in his, careful of the shackles. “You are forgiven, Talwyn.”

“You do not owe me such mercy.”

“I give it to you anyway. It is your choice what you do with it.” He squeezed her fingers.

“I was proud of you, Talwyn. The day you took the throne. So many losses weighing you down, and yet you took on the burden of four Courts. I was so proud of you that day. I never told you. I wanted you to know.”

More tears spilled over. He squeezed her fingers once more before he released them and pushed back to his feet. He moved over to the stone wall, sitting down beside the empty bowls. It was several minutes before she’d gathered herself enough to do the same.

They sat in silence, staring at the mountains. The sun was nearing its peak when Sorin spoke again. “I know this has already been an emotional day for you, but we do need to discuss what is to come.”

She nodded. She’d been waiting for this. Waiting to hear what had been decided about her future. She would accept whatever it was as long as she did not need to sit in the unknown any longer.

“You will no longer rule, Talwyn,” he said quietly. “Scarlett claimed your Courts after you were brought here. If you wish to have your throne back, you will need to challenge her, and you will not win.”

“I think it is quite obvious that I am no longer fit to rule over anyone,” she replied tightly, her fingers toying with the edge of her tunic. “Perhaps it was once my destiny to rule, but my time for that has come to an end.”

She felt more than saw him glance over at her. “What do you wish to do then, Talwyn?”

It was a question that had plagued her since Azrael had left.

A question she had pondered since he had challenged her to start thinking about what she would change if given the chance, and the truth was, she did not know.

She had been raised to rule since she had entered this world.

Had never entertained any other options.

She would forever be remembered as the queen who had handed over her people to monsters for the sake of her own petty revenge.

But perhaps she could do some good for a few people.

Maybe they would remember her as something different, even if it was just one person.

“I wish to help,” she finally answered. “In whatever I can and in whatever way Scarlett will allow me to do so.”

Sorin stiffened a little beside her. “Alaric has Cyrus and Neve. He will only release them in exchange for a Fae Queen.”

“But I am no longer that.”

“Yes, but he does not know that,” Sorin said. “Scarlett and Cassius will take you to the continent at sundown to make the exchange.”

“But Ashtine will be here?” she asked. “And Azrael? He will stay with you.”

Sorin turned his head to look at her. “Ashtine will be here and safe. Azrael will fight alongside us when the time comes.”

Relief washed over her. “Good. That is what matters. If I can help by getting Cyrus and Neve back, then that is what I will do. If I can get you any information on their plans, I will do that too.”

Sorin looked as though he wanted to say something more, but he kept his mouth shut.

“What?” Talwyn pressed.

He didn’t answer for a long moment before he said, “I want to tell you not to put yourself in more danger than necessary, that trying to get us information could likely get you killed, but you are right, Talwyn. You do not need my protection anymore.”

“This is war, Sorin,” she answered. “Let me fight on the right side of it, if only for a little while.”

He nodded, and she could swear there was the briefest glimmer of pride in those dull amber eyes.

Before either of them could speak again, two figures stepped from the air. Two silver heads of hair. Cethin’s hand rested on Scarlett’s shoulder, almost as though he was prepared to hold her back if necessary. The queen was rigid as she stared at Talwyn.

And Talwyn held her stare as she rose from the wall and sank to a knee before the Avonleyan royalty, then bowed her head.

“What is it?” Sorin asked, getting to his feet and striding towards them.

Talwyn lifted her head to see Scarlett dragging her eyes from her to her husband, but she was not the one who answered him.

“Our mother is here,” Cethin said.

“Saylah is here? In Aimonway?” Sorin asked, looking back and forth between the siblings.

Scarlett nodded. “She has come to fulfill her end of the deal. She has come to tell us how to restore your power.”