Page 3 of Kill Your Darlings
It took a second to process.I said automatically, “Tomorrow night’s the publisher’s banquet with Wheaton & Woodhouse.”
Finn looked blank, but then said quickly, “Maybe drinks afterwards?”
“Uh…yeah.Of course!”It came out brightly with a preprogrammed smile.I was—surprised.A little confused.Disappointed for sure.
Of course, there was no reason Finncouldn’t, shouldn’t make other plans for dinner the night he arrived.He might be dining with his agent.There’d be plenty of opportunity for meals together over the next few days.
Opportunity for other things, too, presumably.
Hopefully.
No reason to feel…anything, really.
Except.
Except Finn hadn’t been—hadn’t seemed like—he’d seemed like meeting for drinks was plenty.All he required of me.
No.I was reading way too much into a ninety-second exchange.We were both in the middle of stuff, and he was—
Not interested in seeing me tonight.
I listened to the echo of that thought and understood why my stomach was tying itself into double and triple knots, as if there was something wrong.Because somethingwaswrong.Finn wasn’t interested in making plans forafterdinner, either.
And that was another disquieting first.
Usually, we spent pretty much every free minute of every conference together—not that there were so many free minutes because attending a conference was not the same as going on vacation.Though spending our down time together made them feel a little less like work.
Down time.There was a euphemism.
I realized Rachel had finished checking her phone and was talking to me.
“I missed that,” I said.
“Hm?Oh.I said, I’m supposed to be having dinner with Adrien.He was right here a minute ago.”She scanned the large conference room, which had nearly emptied out by then.
“Try the bar,” I suggested.“I think he and Christopher were headed in that direction.”
“Of course they were.”Rachel sighed.“You’re headed over there as well, I suppose?”
I had been, but suddenly, unexpectedly, I didn’t have the energy, the heart, for it.For any of it.The bright laughter and loud chatter.The crush of people.The pressure of all that…emotion.
I wasn’t ready to run into Finn, knowing what I now knew.
Jesus.Enough with the dramatics.
He made other plans for dinner.What was the big deal?
You know what the big deal is.
And yeah, I did.Knew it instantly and instinctively.No words needed.
But it wasn’t as if I’d imagined it was going to last forever, our…friendship.
Didn’t you?
Anyway, we were still friends.Still…partners in crime, as it were.Until Lila and Vaughn decided otherwise.
But I was going to need…
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