Page 22 of Kayla's List

Since we are already on the strip, we decide to do the tourist thing and walk to different casinos. We passed street performers and the guys handing out flyers for parties. I can’t say that I’ve ever enjoyed the nightlife that Vegas had to offer.

I came forTechCon, and I worked most of the day, went to dinner, then turned in for the night. Warren didn’t like clubs, so we didn’t go. I never cared for them because I wasn’t comfortable in tight dresses and high heels. It never dawned on me that I could wear something else and still be sexy.

However, I was so busy comparing myself to all of Warren’s ex-girlfriends that I didn’t feel comfortable in anything. I was so insecure and unsure that I was happy not to have to get dressed up for anything. And because he never complained or asked me to change, I assumed he didn’t mind how I looked.

Now, I know where assuming gets you. It’s a reason that the old saying “if you assume, you make an ass out of you and me” is so popular. It’s true as hell.

“Hey, let’s go in here!” Anderson’s excited voice pulls me out of my negative thoughts. He intertwines our fingers together and leads me to theParishotel.

Anderson doesn’t let go of my hand, and I have to say I’m not opposed to the feeling of his touch. His large warm palm engulfs mine, and although the connection I feel towards him is strong, at least I know that first night wasn’t a fluke.

It’s something about this man that makes me want to know more about him. I’m not sure why yet, but I feel crazy because I can’t wait to find out. I should feel more guilt about having these feelings about another man so soon after my break-up, but I keep pushing down that feeling to enjoy the moment.

#28. Be more spontaneous.

Anderson stops and buys tickets to the Ferris wheel, and I’m excited. The last time I went on a ride like this was when I was a kid in foster care, and Miss Louise took me to the state fair. She was one of the few homes that I truly didn’t want to leave, but she was an older lady and could no longer care for me. I was sent to a new home full of nightmares.

I shake off the morose feeling and get back in the moment.Live in the moment, Kayla.I find that I have to remind myself of this over and over again. It takes work to break bad habits, and I am proud of myself for not automatically slipping back into my comfort zone.

When we arrive at the opening of the Ferris wheel, I’m amazed. This isn’t some rinky-dink fair ride. The entrance looks like something that belongs on a spaceship. The ceilings are round and tall, with different color lights illuminating the space. The pods have large windows that have a clear view of the strip.

We were able to get our own pod because it was so late, and I can’t say that I mind. Anderson sat so close that his fresh citrusy scent surrounded me. He placed his arm around me, and I snuggled into his chest.

“I’ve never gotten to see Vegas like this before,” I break the comfortable silence. I could hear the wonderment in my voice. I never even thought of doing something like this.Maybe I should expand my list.

“Yeah, it’s a great way to see the strip all lit up,” Anderson replies.

“It’s beautiful,” I say, relaxing even more into my date.

“You’re beautiful.” Anderson’s voice is low, and the raspy sound makes me shiver.

I look up into his beautiful sparkling eyes, and my breath hitches at the truth that I see in them. Nobody has ever looked at me the way he does.Nobody.

“Thank you,” I whispered shyly. But I don’t look away because I can’t.

Anderson’s eyes have me hypnotized, and it’s like I’m falling into the deepest part of the ocean. I’m drowning in emotions that are unfamiliar to me with just one look from this man. Anderson licks his lush lips, and I’m eager to experience his kiss again.

“Can I kiss you, Kayla?”

I nod before the question even fully comes out of his mouth.

Anderson leans over and places a soft kiss against my lips. He slowly moves his mouth over mine. It’s not rushed or aggressive like our first kiss. I get lost in the tenderness, and I sigh when he pulls back.

Again, I’m surprised by the kiss. I was expecting a savage overtaking, and instead, I got a gentle whisper against my lips. I don’t know what to expect from Anderson, and for the first time, that doesn’t scare me.

In the back of my mind, I know that I should be afraid of him because he’s so intense, but he doesn’t scare me. And for the life of me, I can’t figure out why.Maybe this letting go thing is easier than I thought.

#2. Let go of things you can’t control.

11

Push

ANDERSON

Icouldn’t stop kissing Kayla. I knew I was in trouble the moment my lips touched hers at the bar. I couldn’t control the possessiveness that bubbled up in me. I had no claim to her, but no matter how hard I tried to convince myself, my heart wasn’t hearing it.

As the lights from the strip danced across Kayla’s gorgeous face, I couldn’t help but take in all of her features that I missed before. The small beauty mark on the corner of her upper lip, the smooth brown skin interrupted by the tiny scar by her right eye, full cheeks that dimple just slightly when she smiles.