Page 38

CHAPTER 38

An Important Question

KELLEN

A tticus texted me an hour ago.

Atticus

She got the England job

Those five words sent fear coursing through my veins. It makes my plan even more important, and more desperate, and potentially less likely to work.

Me

Thanks for letting me know

Atticus

Plus an offer from our father

Shit.

No matter how deranged it sounds, I’m going to try to win Lucy Knox’s heart.

Last night, I had a long and ridiculous text conversation with the Kellcy Fake Dating Planning Committee, minus Lucy. It culminated in a video call. Lachlan, Harley, Atticus, Raleigh, and Bri all joined. It was the middle of the night in London, so January was sleeping. And I refused to include Finn, Heath, and Romeo. Fuck those guys. They’d probably just pop some popcorn and laugh at me.

It was unanimous that I should do something big to try to win her back. Did I ever have her?

And yup, there was an actual vote.

My objective is simple: Tell Lucy how I feel and ask her out on a real date. Tell her I want her to stay and then leave it up to her. I need her to know that I want to be with her.

I push through the doors into the empty arena. I love this place when it’s void of people, players, fans, and noise. There’s a deep peace on the ice that means so much to me. It’s carved my life into what it is today.

I can’t give this up, and I’m torn about asking Lucy to walk away from the England job.

We could do long distance. Really long distance. I could spend the summers there and bring Ava along for some of it. Lucy could visit a few times during hockey season. Holidays together.

But that plan is unhinged. It would never work.

And it would involve me being away from Ava, which is what I’ve been trying to avoid all season. Ava’s the reason why I’ve even been able to get to know Lucy.

Right now, Lucy is at a press briefing. Atticus told me that as well. She asked him to pick up MBM from the Delightful Doggy Palace at four o’clock.

Apparently, she thinks her dog has been spending too much time in daycare. I don’t understand how Lucy thinks she’s giving that dog away. She’s clearly obsessed with him.

I pause at her office on my way to the stairwell, wondering if I can catch her before she heads to the briefing room. Her door is cracked, and I knock and slowly push it open.

She’s not there.

But there’s a cardboard box on her desk, filled with her belongings. For a second, my feet are frozen to the floor. She’s really leaving.

Fuck. I have to hurry.

I jog to the stairwell and take the steps two at a time up to the second floor. Down the hallway past the corporate suite.

The thing is, Lucy’s spent years thinking she’s not good enough. I get that now. Her asshole ex cheated on her. Her own father wouldn’t promote her at work and certainly wouldn’t defend her against her ex.

They don’t respect her. They don’t think she’s good enough.

They are also idiots.

I need her to know she’s more than good enough. She’s better than I deserve.

The door is open to the last conference room—the big space is used for formal team meetings and press briefings.

It’s quiet as I approach, but then I see that there are a few rows of journalists already seated, notebooks in their hands, press badges clipped to their shirts. I step into the room and remain in the back.

Lina is talking at the podium. Next to her is Paul, a few corporate leaders like Claire Morgansten, the HR woman who interviewed Lucy and I back in October about our relationship, and a handful of people I don’t know.

And Lucy.

She’s wearing a long, dark blue cotton dress with short sleeves and a scooped neckline. Her curls are off her neck in a messy bun, and two tendrils lay along the side of her face.

I watch her. She doesn’t see me yet. I can’t believe I did so wrong by this woman. That I used her to protect myself from Paul and Savannah and then went along with the breakup like she didn’t mean everything to me. I hid behind all the excuses in the world: my trust issues, Ava, hockey, anything to avoid my feelings.

Especially after I fell in love with her.

I’d like to spend forever making it up to Lucy.

“We have an exciting new sponsorship to announce today,” Lina says. “We’ve been hammering out the details for a few months now.” She glances at the people I didn’t recognize and smiles. “I’ll let Paul say a few words.”

Paul steps to the podium, and I completely tune him out. The sponsorship representative joins him up front. Christ, the press must be bored to tears.

I’m about to make it a lot more interesting for them.

My gaze is drawn back to Lucy, and I find her staring at me, eyes wide. Her gaze is like a beam of sweet summer sunshine.

I smile at her, but she looks even more confused.

“Anyone have questions?” Paul asks.

One reporter asks about the previous headline sponsor. Paul answers that one. Another reporter asks if the players have any new individual sponsors. Lina steps forward and speaks.

Then the room falls quiet. It’s time for me to prove to Lucy that she’s good enough.

Starting with one date.

Heart pounding, I shoot my hand in the air. Lucy mouths what are you doing and shakes her head.

“Oh, hi Kellen,” Lina says, an easy smile on her face. “Did you have a question?” Her expression says of course you don’t , and did you get lost? and what are you doing?

“Yes, I do.” I push away from the back wall and take three steps up the center aisle. The reporters turn and look at me expectantly, most of them smiling.

“Go on.”

“I wanted to ask Lucy Knox if she’d go to dinner with me.”

There are smiles and chuckles from the audience, who’s looking between me and Lucy. Lina looks over at Lucy with wide eyes.

“Don’t worry, everyone,” I say. “I cleared it with HR.” The HR woman raises her eyebrows and looks less than amused, but the journalists chuckle.

Lucy is staring at me, her mouth dropped open, and her pink cheeks are the cutest thing I’ve ever seen.

“A little off the agenda—” Lina sneaks a look at Paul, who shrugs and half rolls his eyes. He’s the most chilled out I’ve ever seen him.

“—but I guess I’ll allow it.” Lina throws her hands in the air and waits for me to speak.

“Lucy?” I take a deep, filling breath. What I’m about to do might be career-limiting, and this time it’s mine, not Lucy’s. Despite his nonchalant look at the moment, Paul might be disgusted with my display. The press might destroy me. Lina might cease recommending me for sponsorships. I’ll certainly get called into HR.

“I am so sorry that I let things end between us. It was a huge mistake, and I’ll never forgive myself for losing the past month with you.”

I don’t talk about fake dating. Not sure we need the reporters to put that in their articles. And god knows it was only fake for the shortest moment.

I take another few steps, my thighs feeling like jelly, my heart racing.

Lucy doesn’t say anything but bites her bottom lip in a move that makes me want to kiss her until she can’t breathe.

“I want to start over. With dinner. Will you go out with me? I mean, can I take you out? Because I’m not sure if you know this, but I really like you.” I glance at the row of Blizzard staff, who are staring at me wide-eyed, then at the journalists, who are looking way more lively than before. “I really like her. ”

Lucy stands but stays cemented in place. Her face turns darker pink beneath those adorable freckles.

“Actually, I more than like you. I’m in love with you.”

There are literal gasps from the press, plus a few chuckles. Phones are raised, and I’m sure about a billion photos and videos are being taken. They’ll definitely end up all over the internet.

“Kellen,” Lucy whispers and steps forward.

“Please know that every moment we’ve spent together since you got here last September has been incredible. And I know you might leave—that you’re most likely going to leave—but I don’t want to waste another minute without you.”

Lucy’s chest heaves up and down and she presses her lips together.

“I love you,” I say. “I want you to stay here in Fort Collins, but even if you can’t, I still want to be with you. Whatever pieces of you you’ll let me have, I want them all. I want you. And MBM, if you end up keeping him. I want you to be a part of my life, and Ava’s life. Because she loves you too.”

Lucy lets out a huff of a laugh when I mention her dog and crinkles her forehead when I mention Ava.

I wish she’d run down the aisle and leap into my arms. Wouldn’t she do that if she felt the same way? But I’m asking too much of her. I know it.

I can’t control how she reacts. I can only control what I say and how I react. I take three more steps forward, and now we’re a few feet apart.

“I know it’s complicated. We can figure out all the details later. I’d also like to note that the—” I lower my voice. “—the KFDPC completely approves of this. They even voted on it.”

Lucy laughs, and the sound is the sweetest to my ears.

There’s some murmuring in the crowd.

Meh, they won’t figure that out.

Lucy’s laugh tapers off, and she’s staring at me intensely, tugging at the waist of her dress. She’s thinking. Considering. She swallows, and I watch the ripple of her smooth throat.

Paul scoffs loudly, but when I glance over, he’s not glaring at me, but instead looking mildly amused.

I turn back to Lucy.