Page 47 of Julian

"But if I had told someone—" he started.

"Maybe things would have been different," Angela interrupted gently. "Or maybe they wouldn't have. We'll neverknow, and that's okay. Plus, if things had worked out differently, I wouldn’t have Kiara in my life, and I can’t imagine that. I might not even have Jude.”

“Or you might have had Jude sooner.”

“But I’m the person I am now because of the life I’ve lived and the experiences I’ve had,” she said. “If I hadn’t had that, I might be a different person who wasn’t drawn to Jude, or he might not have loved that version of me. Everything worked out as it should have. I believe that.”

“Really?”

Angela nodded. “What I do know is that you've been carrying this guilt for twenty-four years, and that's twenty-four years too long." She reached out and took his hands in hers. "I want you to let it go, Julian. For your sake, and for your son's sake."

Julian felt something crack open inside his chest at her words. The weight he'd carried for so long—the crushing guilt that had driven him to drink himself into oblivion night after night—began to shift. Not disappearing entirely, but loosening its stranglehold on his heart.

"I don't know how," he whispered, his voice raw.

"One day at a time," Angela said, squeezing his hands. "The same way you're learning to live without alcohol."

Julian became aware that Duncan had moved closer during their exchange. When he looked at his father, he saw something different in the older man's expression. Something softer had replaced the cold fury from their last meeting.

"Son," Duncan said, his voice rough. "I owe you an apology. I should never have reacted the way I did. I was out of line. I’m sorry.”

Julian wanted to accept his apology, but there was a part of him that wondered if Duncan would have had that response had Angela railed at him for what he’d done. Had he apologized because Angela had?

He couldn’t dwell on that right then. The miracle of Angela’s forgiveness was uppermost in his mind. She’d given him something more than just forgiveness, which in and of itself was amazing. She’d also touched his heart with her love.

He’d wrecked her life, and yet she’d still accepted him as her brother, offering forgiveness and love.

Reaching out, he pulled her close again, and she came willingly with a soft laugh.

“Thank you,” he murmured against her hair. “Thank you for everything.”

“You don’t have to thank me,” Angela said. “I want to help ease the burden of guilt that you carry. You can put it down now. You no longer need to feel its weight on your soul.”

Julian closed his eyes, hoping it would be as easy as that.

When they stepped apart again, he smiled down at her. “I hear that congratulations are in order.”

Angela’s face lit up in response to that, and she held out her hand so that he could see the ring on her finger. “I’m over the moon.”

Julian was happy for her. After all she’d been through in her life, she deserved to find love and happiness, even if it was with Jude.

Not that he wasn’t a good man. In fact, he was probably a better man than Julian. It was just that they’d had some tense exchanges over the years.

“Do you think you might be able to come to the wedding?” she asked.

“It depends on when it is, and how things are going here.”

“We haven’t settled on the exact date yet, but probably within the next month,” Angela said. “And I’d love to have you there with us. It’s just going to be small. Family and a few friends.”

Though Julian hadn’t enjoyed attending weddings over the years—and sadly, that included his own—he found he wanted to be there for Angela’s. Maybe it was something he could work towards.

“I’ll see how it goes,” Julian said, not wanting to make a promise, though he really did hope to be there.

“Did you want to see Kiara?”

“See her?” Julian asked. “Is she here?”

Angela nodded. “She’s with Jude and the other security team members in the waiting area.”