Page 3 of Illusory (The Marked Saga #8)
Rolling storm clouds gathered outside the Blackburn Estate, dimming the sky as though the heavens were preparing to weep down its anguish in honor of my latest life sentence. A rush of hot anxiety oozed into my bloodstream as a dozen different questions overwhelmed my mind. Though this hadn’t been the first time I’d heard my mother refer to me as Nephilim , it had felt a hell of a lot realer now that actual Angel wings had busted out from my back and been thrown into the equation.
“Jemma is Lucifer’s daughter,” reminded Jaqueline as my sister and I stood frozen in place; my expression twisted with trepidation, Tessa’s fingernail still digging into my shoulder blade. “She’s His immediate descendant and with her eighteenth birthday quickly approaching, it seems only natural that her Nephilim powers would begin to show themselves.”
Only natural? There was literally nothing natural about any of this.
“But why now?” asked Tessa, sounding more intrigued than anything. “What changed?”
My thoughts automatically shifted to Trace again.
“Eighteen is the age of Ascendance—a time when all Descendants are able to reach the full height of their abilities,” explained Jaqueline. “I imagine it’s the same for Nephilim, and if I’m right, this is only the tip of the iceberg.”
I swallowed roughly, not liking the sound of that one bit. “So, how bad is this going to get exactly?”
Her mouth puckered as she released a heavy breath. “There’s no way to know for sure. Typically, Ascensions are a gradual process for most Anakim as we’re required to train our children from early on. Doing so allows them to slowly come into their own while gradually honing their abilities over time. But that wasn’t the case for you.”
“Not to mention she was Cloaked for most of her life anyway,” added Tessa.
“Precisely.” Jaqueline paused. “But now with your birthday just around the corner…” She shook her head as her eyes grew distant and forlorn, as though my gruesome future were playing out before her eyes. “It’s the equivalent of a faucet being turned on with nothing but a piece of cloth covering the end.”
I flinched at her assessment of the geyser of doom that was heading my way.
The last thing I needed was a broken valve at the helm of my abilities, especially when my list of enemies was growing by the second. I needed to figure out how to control this thing—this Ascension shit—before it controlled me. But how? How was I going to get ahead of it when I had no clue about any of it, let alone how to—
“Is everything alright in here?” interrupted Gabriel from the doorway, halting my spiraling thoughts.
His forehead creased as he took in the three of us standing awkwardly around the kitchen table: My mother looking as though I’d just been diagnosed with a terminal illness. Tessa still pillaging my back with her finger. Me hunched over the chair, panicked and half-naked. His gaze immediately nosedived to the floor.
It took a few seconds for that last part to register.
Horrified, I spun around on my heel, throwing my arms up over my chest to cover up. Granted, I wasn’t actually naked and still had on my bra, but it still felt wildly inappropriate to be standing only semi -clothed in the kitchen in front of Gabriel, of all people. Not that Gabriel was even remotely interested in seeing my lady bits. He’d made that clear to me countless times before. But also, so not the point.
“Here,” said Tessa distractedly as she shoved my shirt into my stomach and turned her focus on Gabriel. “Did you know about this? About the wings?” she asked as I threw my shirt back on as discreetly as possible.
“I only just found out myself.” Gabriel’s eyes sang with regret as though he should have somehow known it was a possibility. “They emerged whilst Trace was feeding on her after his first wake.”
Tessa let out a string of flavorful curse words at his confirmation that the wings were in fact real and not some figment of my imagination. “This is really bad, Jackie,” she said, turning to our mother. “She has wings ,” she announced, as though I hadn’t been saying the same exact thing for the last five minutes.
Now who’s the one not living in reality ?
“What are we going to do if they come out again?” she asked and then grimaced as another thought occurred to her. “And what if they don’t go back in as easily the next time they do?”
“I guess I’m going to need to buy some bigger sweaters,” I answered jokingly, because what the hell else was I supposed to say? There was really no need for me to get hysterical at this point since Tessa was clearly already panicking enough for the both of us.
“This isn’t a joke, Jemma,” she snapped at me, her eyes wild with fear. “Nephilim are not allowed to exist in this Realm. Do you understand that? Do you get what that means? If you think you have a big target on your back now, just wait until the Order finds out about this.”
“So, they won’t be throwing me a coming out party. I’ll cancel the invites.”
“You really don’t get it, do you?” she hissed, clearly finding zero amusement in my poorly timed wisecrack. “They’ve spent actual centuries hunting Nephilim, Jemma—hunting them to the point of extinction like it was a damn sport. Just what do you think they’re going to do to you when they find out you’re a full-fledged member of the ‘all-powerful, feared and revered Nephilim’ race?”
Despite my best effort, my stomach sank at the trill of fear seeping out through her words. She was terrified for me, and she wasn’t even trying to hide it this time.
“I’m guessing they’re going to do the same thing they’ve been trying to do to me since the day I moved here,” I answered evenly, refusing to work myself up about it. As far as I could tell, this really didn’t change much for me in regards to my popularity with the higher ups. I had been persona non grata since the day I moved here.
“Except now they’re going to mean it,” she answered icily. “This won’t be just the Council and our local Temple after you, Jemma. This is going to be the entirety of the Order gunning for you. The best of the best—or worst of the worst—depending on how you want to look at it. And on top of it, you don’t even have the Amulet to protect you anymore. Just when you need it the most.”
Well, she had me on that last one , I thought bitterly as I slumped back into the chair.
“And there’s still the business of the Horsemen on the loose,” reminded Gabriel, because he apparently loved piling on more bad news when the shit was already boomeranging off the fan. “Something tells me they’re going to be doubling down their efforts to coax her into the anointing ritual.”
My skin prickled at his words. “Why? What makes you say that?”
“They’ve been trying and failing to eliminate you since the day they learned of your existence.”
“I’m aware of that. And?” I asked, not seeing the correlation.
“Binding your fate to that of the Horsemen might just be the only thing strong enough to contain you at this particular juncture,” he answered regretfully. “They’ll see it as killing two birds with one stone, and this time, they’ll have the Order’s cavalry backing them.”
Anger roiled under my skin. Those fucktards would totally do something like that. “Well, they’ll have to catch me first because I’d never willingly agree to any of that,” I informed.
“It doesn’t matter. They’ll find a way to force your hand,” said Tessa as she folded down onto the chair beside me and then raked her fingers through her dark hair. “That, or they’ll just drop a bomb on the entire neighborhood and take us all out.”
“Seriously, Tessa? I think that’s pushing it a tad far,” I argued, trying to keep a level head since Tessa obviously wasn’t going to. “I’m glad you’re not overreacting or anything.”
“You don’t know them the way I do, Jemma. You don’t know how far they would go to keep the balance in their favor. Nothing terrifies the Anakim more than a being with more power than them, and scared Anakim are dangerous Anakim. They aren’t going to roll over on this one.”
“Fine. So, they’re going to want me even deader than they wanted me before. Big fucking deal. This doesn’t actually change anything,” I said, meeting each of their gazes. “All I need to do is figure out how to control the wings so that they don’t pop out at the worst possible moment. Like in front of the Senior Magister. As long as I do that, the Order won’t know about any of it until I’m ready for them to know.”
“Until you’re ready for them to know?” Tessa arched her brow at me. “Meaning what?”
“What do you think it means, Tess?” A thick tangle of grief and anger pressed itself down on me as I remembered what Dominic had told me about my father’s murder. That the Order was behind it—that they’d sanctioned it and orchestrated the entire thing. That they’d been steadily destroying my life piece by piece since before I even knew they existed.
“I think it means you’re going to do something stupid or dangerous, or both.”
“You heard what Dominic said. Uncle Karl was behind the attack on dad, and he didn’t do it alone,” I said, not even bothering to deny her accusation. “The Council authorized the whole thing and as far as I’m concerned, their hands are just as bloodied as his were.”
“And if you’re wrong?”
“I’m not.”
“Consider your source, Jemma.”
“Dominic is a lot of things, but he’s never been a liar,” I answered implicitly.
“Maybe not,” she agreed easily, “but I don’t think his sire shared the same quality.”
I couldn’t really argue that. Pricilla wouldn’t know the moral high ground if it was falling down on her head. But still. Something told me she wasn’t lying about this, and deep down, I suspected Tessa knew it was the truth just as much as I did.
As horrible as it was to fathom, it was the only thing that made sense. Because so long as my father was alive to protect me, the Order would never have gained access to me. He was the only thing standing in their way, and they killed him for it. They killed him to get to me .
“I know they were behind what happened to Dad, Tess. I can feel it. Just like they were behind the attack on me . They murdered him right in front of my eyes and then made me sleep under the same roof as the heartless butcher who planned the whole thing. They need to pay for what they did to him. For what they did to all of us. And I’m going to make sure of it.”
“Oh? Planning an all-out war against the entire Council then, are you?” she asked facetiously, as though I were just blowing off steam and ranting.
But I wasn’t.
“You’re damn straight I am.”
Tessa stared back at me, her expression stunned with disbelief as Gabriel ran a palm down the length of his face like he could already see the bloodshed in his mind.
Even though neither of them said anything, I was fairly certain I knew what they thought about my declaration of war, and I was also certain that I didn’t very much care either way.
I had already made up my mind the moment I’d learned the truth about my father’s death. William was on borrowed time and he and his gutless cronies were going to get their comeuppance if it was the last thing I ever did in this lifetime.
“Don’t you think you have enough on your plate right now?” asked Tessa instead, her weathered eyes fixed on me as though they might be able to snap the sense back into my head if they just stared at me hard enough. “What with the Son of Perdition on its way and the Horseman gunning for you to become their Fourth? And let’s not even mention the complete infestation of demons in Hollow Hills at the moment.”
“My plate might be full, but there’s always room for dessert. And the Council? They’re the motherlode of all desserts,” I informed with a vengeful smile, as though I could already taste the victory.
“This isn’t a piece of goddamn cheesecake,” snapped Tessa, obviously not tasting the victory. “This is The Order we’re talking about. The motherfucking Apex predator. The very top of the food chain of power and magic. And you’re what? A brand-new Slayer-slash-Nephilim who can’t even control two percent of the abilities you’re aware of let alone the ones you don’t even know about. You don’t stand a chance against them.”
“Maybe not today I don’t,” I agreed, because I wasn’t completely delusional. “But I’m only getting stronger, and right now, I have something that none of them have.”
“And what’s that? A death wish?”
“No, smart ass. Potential.”
“ Potential? ” Tessa snorted. “Well, thank god for that. I’m sure they’re already shaking in their boots.”
“Laugh all you want, Tess, but I’m serious. If what Jaqueline said about me is true, then that means I have the potential to be more powerful than any of them could ever even dream to be. My blood runs thicker and my heart beats fuller and after everything they’ve done to me, I’m still standing. They didn’t stop me. They couldn’t break me. They barely slowed me down. And even if I’m dead wrong about this and I never end up fast enough or smart enough to stand a chance in hell against any one of them, for dad, it’s a hill I’ll happily die on.”
My words clung to the silence that descended in the room, permeating the air with their verity. This wasn’t about some power grab or the chase of certain victory. It wasn’t about picking sides or spilling blood or even good vs evil. Not anymore. It was about avenging my father—consequences be damned.
“Alright, Little Miss Potential, you made your case,” said Tessa as she crossed her arms and nodded her approval. “I guess we’re taking it to the hills then.”
I blinked back at her, positive I’d misunderstood her. “ We?”
“Yes, we . You don’t actually think I’d let my little sister run off and die on that hill alone, do you?” she asked rhetorically and then softened her voice when she added, “He raised me, too, you know.”
“I know.”
We stared back at one another, as though silently trying to will the other one not to cry—not to let our minds go back to our dad and remember all the ways that he had made our childhood unforgettable. To remember the Christmas mornings and weekly game nights. The bear hugs and mornings breakfasts. But I could tell Tessa’s eyes had already welled up just as badly as mine had, and if we didn’t stop right then, we’d be done for.
Tessa looked away first, wiping the corner of her eyes as she cleared the grief from her throat and then I did the same, shoving my own back down into the pit of my heart where I kept all my memories of him safe.
“So, what’s the plan?” she asked after a short beat, her hardened mask back in place.
It took me a second to realize that I had somehow actually talked the Tessa Blackburn into joining me in my unwinnable war against the Council. Tessa, the bullheaded, stubborn as a mule know-it-all. I bounced a glance at Gabriel who responded with his own nod of approval. I wasn’t entirely sure how I’d made that happen, but I was running like the wind with it anyway.
“The plan is to pick them all off the list, one by one, starting with the Horseman,” I explained evenly, meeting each of their curious gazes. “The more threats we eliminate, the more we tip the scales in our favor. I can’t be looking over my shoulder every second of the day, wondering when the next attempt to hijack my life is going to be, so we definitely need to send those apocalyptic fuckers packing as quickly as possible.”
“Have either of you found anything in the books about them yet?” asked Gabriel, ticking his head to the latest piles of leather-bound textbooks sitting on the kitchen table.
Jaqueline shook her head as she flattened her palm against the stack in front of her. “There was nothing mentioned in the scriptures about the Horsemen, much less anything about vanquishing them. We’re hoping there might be something mentioned in these grimoires,” she added, though she didn’t appear very optimistic about their chances.
“Any contingency plans?” he asked.
Jaqueline shook her head again, regretful.
“What we need to do is get our hands on some damn Angel scripture,” said Tessa, her anarchical side coming out fierce and resounding. “If Jemma is Nephilim, then there’s a good chance she might have the ability to use Angel magic. And if Angel magic is what created the Horseman, then maybe she can un-create them.”
“What about the Sang Noir?” suggested Gabriel, his focus on me. “Weren’t you able to read its coded text?”
I nodded that I had. Looking back now, that probably should have been my first clue that there was something really off about my supposed bloodlines. “Unfortunately, the Council’s holding it hostage at Temple. Knowing them, they’ll probably have armed guards stationed there around the clock.”
Gabriel shook his head. “Not necessarily. I don’t doubt that they have it under lock and key, possibly even warded or in the Vault, but they aren’t going to waste valuable manpower standing around it. Not with all the demons showing up as of late.”
“What are you saying?” asked Tessa, eyeing Gabriel. “Do you think we could actually get access to it?”
He ran his hand along his lower jaw, running the numbers in his head. “It’s possible. The last thing they’re suspecting right now is for one of us to show up at Temple. If need be, we could try to set up some sort of diversion and then have Trace port in there while they’re busy chasing our decoy.”
“That’s actually a really good idea,” said Tessa, her expression lighting up at thought of all the possible supernatural laws we’d be breaking and just how much fun that might be.
“That won’t work.” Everyone turned to gape at me, as though I’d just started making random chimpanzee noises in the kitchen. “Trace can’t port there,” I stated matter-of-factly.
“Why the hell not?” asked Tessa, obviously failing to think the thought all the way through to the end.
“Because he’d set off every protection ward in the place.” A nauseating heaviness sank into my stomach like a block of concrete. “They’d immediately be alerted that there’s a Revenant in the building.”
Porting into Temple without the Council’s permission was dangerous enough on its own, but having a vampire do it was a surefire way to get that vampire killed. And I wasn’t in the business of getting anyone I loved killed—especially not Trace.
“Shit,” muttered Tessa, obviously having forgotten that Trace was now among the recently Turned. “Alright. It’s fine. There’s no need to panic. I’m sure Trace isn’t the only Reaper who can port and who we also trust implicitly to do something like this. We just need to come up with a plan B.”
Right. Plan B. Easy-peasy .
The room fell into silence again as we tried to work out a way around the latest glaring roadblock standing in our way.
“Jemma can do it,” said Jaqueline unexpectantly. Her voice was so low, I was sure I hadn’t heard her right.
“Come again?” I asked, gawking at her like the nut she obviously was.
“You’re the only one that can do this without tipping off the wards.”
“And how exactly did you come to that conclusion, Jackie? Because last I checked, I’m not a Reaper,” I pointed out flatly.
“No, but your Alt was able to travel back in time to warn you about what was coming, wasn’t she?”
“Yes, but that still doesn’t make me a Reaper on this Timeline.”
“You don’t need to be one. You’re Nephilim, Jemma. If you were able to learn the ability in the future, then that means you have that ability and can learn it now just as easily. We just need someone to teach you how to use it.”
For some reason, I hadn’t made that connection and suddenly, the air felt as though it had been knocked out of my lungs.
“Get Trace up here right now,” ordered Tessa, like the plan was already set in stone.
Gabriel turned toward the hallway, but I quickly threw out my hands to stop him. I hadn’t even had a chance to process Jaqueline’s words, let alone get on board with it.
“Woah! Hang on a minute! Where are you going?!” I hissed, my eyes bugging out of my head with panic. “Don’t you think we need to think this through first?” I asked, desperate to slow everything down a beat. To stop the room from spinning like a haunted Ferris wheel on crack.
“What’s there to think about?” asked Tessa, her mouth downturned in a frown. “This is a solid plan, Jemma.”
“Except for the part where Trace just Turned five seconds ago…and is also not on speaking terms with me.”
Her frown morphed into an angry scowl. “Well, that’s too fucking bad for him. He’s just going to have to put on his big boy pants and get the hell over it,” she spat as she shot up from her chair and then marched out of the kitchen like a category five hurricane.
A hurricane that was undoubtably headed straight for Trace.