Page 169 of I Dream of Dragons

No.I jerk in the dark.No, I don’t want to see anymore. No more pain and death. No memories of all the years spent in the ocean.

Not all is clear. In places, my mind has erected such thick walls to protect my sanity that bringing them down is all but impossible.

I drift in the blackness, swayed by the currents of the sea, and close my eyes.

When I open my eyes again, I’m disoriented. I don’t know where I am, and as the memories rush back in, I’m even more confused.

This is my room. How did I get here from the parlor where I was with Jai?

Then more memories return, vague and hazy, of Jai carrying me in his arms through the palace, placing me in my bed.

And now he’s gone.

Where is he? Did something happen? Is he okay?

Clenching my fists, I sit on the bed and take a deep breath. I look down at myself. No scales. No changes. No sign of my magic is visible on my body.

“Breathe through it, it’s all right, just breathe through it, makhair.”

I will my fear to dispel. He was probably summoned by the king while I was out. The need to find him is so intense, I’m on my feet, dizzy and disoriented, heading for the door.

But when I open it, I find Arkin there.

“Jai told you to guard me,” I whisper, clutching the doorframe for support.

“No, Jai… he had to be elsewhere and I know he’d want me to look out for you.”

I shake my head. “Look out for me. Is that what you did that night with the king? Looked out for me?”

His jaw works. “I already explained to Jai?—”

“But not to me. How would you explain the fact that you and Tru blocked my way, and that later Tru…”

“Tru, what?”

I watch his face for any flicker indicating he knows what his friend did. That he almost killed me. But I only see curiosity and some confusion. He may be a great actor.

Or he may not know.

“Nothing,” I whisper. “So… explain?”

He’s frowning at me. Then he steps into my room, forcing me to take a few steps back. “I’m not supposed to be telling you this.”

“You’re not?”

“But maybe you can sway Jai’s mind now you’ve grown closer together.”

It’s my turn to frown. “Sway his mind?”

He closes the door behind him, glances around as if he’s expecting people to step out of the shadows at the corners of the room. “Nobody can know about this. The king can’t read your mind through the betrothal bond, can he?”

“I don’t know,” I tell him frankly. “But I don’t think so.”

The king hasn’t given any indication so far that he has access to what’s going on inside my head.

“Fair enough,” Arkin says. “Try not to let him find out.”

“About what?”