Page 68 of Hold 'Em Tight
His face falls with guilt, and I know I’m not wrong. He’s not even defending himself.
“You know, happy and in love, soon to be married people don’t act like that, Lennox.”
He might be trying to lie to himself, but he’s not fooling me. He’s good at playing the part, I’ll give him that, but I know him better than most people. If Mateo were to look, rather than be blinded by his pain and anger, he'd see it too. They all would.
“I don’t know what you're talking about,” he tries to deny.
“Bullshit,” I snap, taking a step forward as anger fills me. “Do you love her?” I demand, asking again.
“She’s the mother of my child.” He sounds broken as he says the words. I want to scream at him that I was the mother of his child too. But the world is a cruel place, and evil always wins.
“That’s not what I asked you!” My voice shakes, and I'm just barely holding back the tears. “You're here, telling me you stilllove me. But tell me, Lennox, do you love her? Are you in love with her like you were with me?”
“No!” The conviction in his voice has me weak in the knees. “I’d never love her the way I love you and Mateo. Never in a million years.”
His confession has me both filled with joy and wanting to cry in pain.
“Then, why?” My chest hurts from just asking the question. “Why are you with her?”
“Because I love my daughter.” He strangles out, running his hands through his hair in agitation, grabbing handfuls almost like a madman would.
I don't know what else to say. I want to tell him he doesn’t have to be with Missi to be a father to his daughter.
Then again, I shouldn’t care. He cheated on me and Mateo. He broke our trust, and our hearts. I shouldn’t even be entertaining this conversation.
I need to end this now before it goes on any longer.
“I think it’s time for you to go.”
His head snaps up, his eyes wide and wild. “What? No.” He shakes his head vigorously. “Stop, no, please. Not yet.” He jumps to his feet. “I’m not ready to go.” His voice breaks as he takes a step forward.
Tears spring to my eyes, and I know I’m about to break. It’s easy to be a sucker for the ones who hold a piece of your heart. Some part of me will always be owned by this man, whether I like it or not.
I still love him, even though I shouldn’t. I still want him, even though I know it’s the worst thing to crave.
His eyes stare into mine, and I swear it’s like I’m looking straight into his soul. My body shivers, and my eyes are wet with tears, as my heart feels like it’s beating a million times a minute.
“Please.” That one word, a plea, is like a man begging for a lifeline.
My breathing quickens with every step he takes closer to me. I don’t move, even though I should. And when he reaches me, I don't stop him when he cups my face. “Please.” This time it comes out as a soft sigh.
He leans down to kiss me, and just like that, I break.
A whimper leaves my mouth, mixing with his desperate moan as his lips connect with mine.
He cradles my face like you would something precious and breakable, while the other hand slides into the back of my hair, holding my head as he devours my lips with his.
My head is spinning, as all logical sense leaves my mind. My body comes alive, like it recognizes his touch and taste.
It’s like we’ve been pulled out of our bodies, and we're floating in the air above where no one can touch us.
Until the bubble is popped, making us crash back down to earth when his phone starts to ring.
I try to pull away, but he keeps his hold on me. “Ignore it,” he says, going for another kiss.
I’m a sucker, and I let him keep going. But when the phone starts up again, I manage to find some sense of control.
“Answer it,” I tell him, panting heavily while my body still hums as I take a step away. “It could be Missi.”
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