Page 18

XYREK

The ship was quiet. Oh, so perfectly quiet. The cleaning drones had already cleaned every last reminder of the humans away, and I was finally alone with my course set for Pandrax. The ship moved steadily through hyperspeed. It was familiar and reliable—nothing like her.

I should have felt relief leaving her and the others behind. And I did! But something felt off about being alone. Especially in my quarters, where my bed— my bed! Finally, I was able to lie in my bed again—and it still smelled of her .

Alice.

The female I absolutely, without question, did not miss. I scowled and shifted uncomfortably on the mattress. Tomorrow morning, I would be in Pandrax's orbit. Then, I would let loose. I would get drunk and fight, probably for days. I would celebrate finally being free again.

I closed my eyes, only to see green orbs float in front of me. I groaned and turned around. I needed to focus on something else, something that mattered—like Garth’s intel about the Ohrurs and the secrets they’d been keeping—most of all, about Darlam.

I had already read up on it. According to the records, the planet belonged to the Ohrurs but had been placed under quarantine for the past twenty thousand years. That's a long time to keep a planet under quarantine , I mused. A very long time.

According to the GTU database, a deadly disease had broken out soon after the Ohrurs began inhabiting it—there was no mention of any aborigines—causing over fifty percent of the Ohrur population to die out. Strangely, only the Ohrurs got sick with whatever the disease was—it was never named. Stranger yet, the disease never reached any other species in the universe, which was surprising and suspicious. The Ohrurs were merchants; they were always in contact with other species. The likelihood of them not spreading a disease that killed fifty percent of their population was slim to none, yet… That was, unfortunately, all I found. There was nothing that would give me a hint on why the other Space Guardians were headed that way.

I was sure I would find out as soon as I connected with them, but first, I had a few days of letting loose ahead of me. I deserved it.

My eyes closed one more time, but another question kept bothering me. The other Space Guardians couldn’t be apart from their mates further than a few paces—as if some unseen force physically tethered them together. But not Alice and me. That had never been a problem for us. She was on Astrionis. I was here, alone, perfectly fine.

Except…

My body didn’t feel fine. My cock didn’t feel fine. My mind sure as a starbane didn’t feel fine.

You just need a really good, sound fight. Sore muscles will exorcise her from your mind , I soothed myself. Then everything will be fine. Despite that reassurance, my mind wouldn't give it a rest. Why didn't Alice's and my mating marks act up more? Was it because it wasn’t the same kind of bond? Or have the marks, for whatever reason, not fully activated yet?

I tossed and turned and couldn’t help wondering how Alice was faring. Did Silla find a nice place for her? Would she be able to work her trade? Was she comfortable? All those thoughts were driving me crazy.

Just a quick comm , my mind tempted, soon you'll be out of range anyway . That sounded reasonable. I had taken on responsibility for her and the others when I took them in, so why not check up on her?

I pulled out my comm and connected it to hers. Ticks later, I found myself standing in her new room. Candles burned on several surfaces, a simple bed stood in a corner, and Alice sat on it. At the same time, I sat on my bed and watched her hovering, seated form in my room.

"Hey," she said with a small smile, "can't sleep?"

I looked around her room, it wasn't big, but it had a homey quality to it—as much I could define the word homey .

"Are you all well taken care of?" I asked, ignoring her question, needing to distract her and me from the fact that I commed her. I wanted it to at least appear somewhat like professional curiosity and not me missing her already after only a few hours. But seeing her there, so close, it was almost like a drug addict finding his fix.

She tilted her head. “We’re fine. Silla’s already found me something to do with my hands. Said I looked like the type who gets dangerous when idle.”

I let out a soft exhale. “She’s not wrong.”

Her smile widened, then softened. “You didn’t answer me. Can’t sleep?”

I focused on the flickering candlelight behind her instead of her face. “Sleep is… inefficient when the mind is unsettled.”

“Unsettled,” she echoed. “Sounds serious.”

“It isn’t,” I said too quickly.

A pause stretched. She didn’t push. That was one of the things I found so... maddening about her. She knew exactly when not to dig. Which, of course, only made me want to talk.

“You’re adjusting well,” I said, which was the truth. But it wasn’t why I’d commed.

She nodded, tucking her legs beneath her. “It’s quiet here. Peaceful. You’d hate it.”

“I never said I hated peace.”

“No,” she said, meeting my eyes. “But you never said you liked it either.”

My hands curled around the edge of the bed, trying to find something to ground myself. This had been a bad idea. Now, I had to watch what I said. Instead of admitting that I missed her, I lied, “I just wanted to make sure the transfer went smoothly.”

I wasn't sure if she believed me or not, but her voice sounded kind of heavy, too, or that might have just been wishful thinking. “Well… thanks for checking in on me, Commander.”

The title stung more than it should have. “Good night, Alice.”

I ended the comm before I could do something stupid. Like tell her I’d slept better when she was on the ship. Or that the room already felt too empty.

At some point, I must have finally fallen asleep because when I woke up, I was already missing her again . It took some willpower, but I managed not to comm her in the morning. I made it to the evening before I succumbed.

The comm connection pulsed softly before stabilizing; her image flickered into clarity. She sat cross-legged on her bed again, hair tied back, a faint smudge of oil on her temple. She looked tired. She looked like herself.

“Hey,” she said. “Didn’t think I’d hear from you again so soon.”

“I had… a systems update to discuss,” I replied, too fast. Her eyebrow arched, but I didn’t elaborate.

Instead, I let the silence stretch while I observed her. The lines around her eyes were softer tonight. She wasn’t guarded. That made it harder.

She tilted her head. “You always do that.”

“Do what?”

“Stare like you’re trying to calculate the tensile strength of my bones.”

“I already know that,” I said without thinking.

She laughed, and the sound landed somewhere beneath my sternum and stroked my cock.

“I had dinner with Silla and Garth,” she said after a moment. “They asked if I wanted to go to Rottvan.”

“What's on Rottvan?”

“They’re still building the settlement. It’s rough terrain—new systems, no infrastructure. They need engineers.” She hesitated, then added, “They asked if I’d consider helping establish it.”

“You just arrived on Astrionis,” I pointed out. I didn’t like the idea of her going to another planet, but had no idea why. It shouldn't matter to me if she was on Astrionis or Rottvan. Tomorrow, I would be on Pandrax, and a good fight and plenty of spirits would exorcise her from my mind.

“I know.” She glanced down at her hands, then back up at me. “But they’re offering full autonomy. I'd get to build the colony’s systems from scratch.”

I forced my expression to remain neutral. “It sounds like a challenge.”

She grinned, “Exactly.”

Of course, she would like that.

“They want you to leave right away,” I said. It wasn’t a question. It was an ache.

“No,” she said gently. “They offered. I haven’t decided.”

I wanted to tell her not to go, that she was better off on Astrionis, and that it wasn’t worth the risk. But I had no claim, no right.

“Then decide carefully,” I said instead. “Don’t let them push you into it.”

Her smile softened, small and unreadable. “You’d miss me.”

I didn’t answer, but I knew I would. Because I already did. She let the silence speak for both of us this time.

“Goodnight, Xyrek.” She finally said.

“Goodnight… Alice.” I replied, already dreading the stillness of my quarters and the ache I knew would spread with the loneliness. Frygg. I had never felt lonely in my entire life before. Then she was gone again, and the echo of her voice lingered like static through the comm line.

* * *

Excited, I woke the next day in Pandrax's orbit. I requested permission to land, and within an hour, I set foot in the Fighting Pit I had selected. The air inside was thick with heat and scent—the kind that sank into your skin, your blood, and your bone. I had been in places like this before. Places where things were brutal, simple, and uncomplicated. Just what I needed.

Before I had a chance to find the Fight Master, a tall, dark-skinned female with shimmering eyes slinked toward me. She assessed me from head to toe. "You look like a male in need of a distraction."

"You could say that." I grinned like an idiot, anticipating the fight that would physically exhaust me enough to give my mind the break it needed.

She gestured smoothly toward one of the private chambers. "I can help with that," she purred suggestively.

Her suggestion shouldn't have taken me by surprise, but it did. She wasn't here to welcome me to a fight; she was offering her body. She was pretty and looked clean. But I didn't feel the slightest stirring from my cock. No desire. None. I could have been talking to anybody, not someone offering me mind-blowing sex.

The memory of how my cock had deflated at the idea of looking for relief in a pleasure house returned full force. Followed by green eyes and a wide smile appearing in front of my vision. Damn her. Damn Alice.

Frygg!

Instinctively, I knew that it wouldn’t matter how many Pronex I fought, how much damage I did or received, or how much distance I brought between Alice and me. I wanted her. And only her . That's why I had commed her the first night after I left Astrionis, and last night, and nearly again this morning.

"Come on, handsome, let me show you a good time," the female enticed, her hand reaching for my cock. I swiped it away. Just the thought of her touching me sent shivers of revulsion down my spine.

Again, green eyes and milky skin danced in front of my vision. I slapped my hand to my face and drew it slowly down. This couldn't be happening. It just couldn't. Was this what the Lord Protector had been talking about? Maybe the others hadn't been able to get their dicks up when they were separated, and the Lord Protector, stifling that he was, had worded it differently.

It didn't matter, because it seemed I was cursed.

It wanted Alice.

It was Alice’s voice in my head that made my blood burn. The way she argued, the way she smirked, the way she glared at me like she was two ticks from throwing something at my head. Infuriating, irritating, absolutely impossible, Alice.

She was the one I wanted, the only one I wanted.

A growl rumbled deep in my chest, not from desire but irritation.

The female in front of me hesitated and watched me carefully. "Is something wrong?"

Yes. You're not her! "I'm not in the market for sex; you'll have to find someone else." Irritation jolted through me for the slight wave of guilt washing up in me. What did I have to feel guilty about? You could have said it nicer , a voice that sounded suspiciously like Alice popped up. Great, now I was having internal debates with her.

Frygg.

It had been a mistake coming here.

Because my cock wanted Alice.

My body wanted Alice.

My mind wanted Alice.

Maybe it was the stupid mating marks. I nodded to myself. Yes, that had to be it. There must have been some pheromones, hormones, or cosmic juice in them that anchored me to her.

I returned to my ship, but as soon as I entered the cargo hold, my mind projected Alice by the hatch, fumbling with the damn controller. And just like luck would have it, the cursed cleaning drone she had never been able to fix appeared and kept running its head into the wall. Over and over. "Yeah, buddy, I know how you feel," I snarked, then wanted to slap myself. Now I was talking to myself? Frygg.

I kicked the stupid drone so hard that it shattered against the wall. Serves you right , I thought, but my quick burst of violence did nothing to clear my head. The moment I entered the hall, I saw her again. Alice. Staring at me.

I banged my head against the wall, just like the damn drone. Unfortunately, I couldn't kick myself.

Two days we had spent together. Two frygging days. There was no way in the universe that I couldn't part from her after only knowing her for two days. I entered the bridge—big mistake. Her face looked up at me from the panel she had worked on while saving us from the Ohrurs overwriting our course. She had looked so damn proud. So pleased with herself. And well she should have been. She was a frygging genius.

I rubbed my neck. Two days. There was no way to fall for someone in two days. Well, maybe it had been a few more than that, but she had only stayed in my quarters for two days. Before that… before that, she had already driven me insane.

It had not been necessary to kiss her that day. I could have simply led her by her hand back to my quarters, and the humans would have received the same message just fine. But I didn't, because I wanted to kiss her. Wanted to feel those pliable lips underneath mine.

And now I wanted more. I wanted her.

I didn't even know how that would work. I had some credits stored away because it had never sat well with me that the Ohrurs kept my part of the payments. It was as if part of me had always known they would try to cross me, but I had enough credits to last Alice and me for a lifetime. That wasn't where I was headed, though. I was going to Darlam to find out what was happening with the mating marks, about us, and who we were.

It occurred to me that maybe Alice had a right to be on that journey with me since, for whatever reason, she carried the same mating marks. Whatever it was, we were connected.

What would I say, though, if I returned to Astrionis or Rottvan or wherever the frygg she was? It wasn't like I could declare my undying love for her. Neither could I tell her that I missed her.

That's when I realized that my fingers had been busy the entire internal debate, setting a course for Astrionis.

Okay, for a few days, I'll go there , I told myself. Just for a few days…