Page 28 of Gin & Sin (Last Call #2)

TWENTY-EIGHT

KIT

It’s been two days since Stewart left and went back home. Lowen worked his magic with Oakley and got an emergency repair done, which ordinarily would be awesome, but I’m sitting here at my own bar, pouting like a toddler who lost his favorite toy.

“Why the face, Kit Kat?” Ridley sidles up next to me, bumping his arm into mine. “Worried we’re gonna be slow? We won’t be. Salem’s been posting on socials all day and we’re already booked for dinner service.”

“I wasn’t worried.”

“But something’s wrong. You’ve been on a cloud of sunshine for weeks and now you look like someone pissed in your cereal.”

“Nah, man. I’m good.” I sit up a little straighter and glance around. “Thanks for checking in though.”

“That’s about as believable as me becoming a vegan,” Lowen drawls from behind me. He flanks me on the other side. “Try again.”

“Nothing’s wrong, guys.” Before I know it, everyone has gathered around the bar, all eyes on me, and I sigh in resignation. “Fine. Okay, maybe I miss Stewart.”

“Dude, it’s been two days,” Bane says. “You got it that bad?”

“It was nice. That’s all.”

Salem leans across the bar with a total shit-eating grin on his lips. “You can admit it, Kit. We’re all friends here.”

“Admit what?”

“That it’s not casual anymore?” Jerryn says softly.

“No, it is. Stewart needs to find his way with all of this. It would be selfish of me to try and lock him down.”

“But you want to, right?” Bane asks. “It’s not like we didn’t witness it.”

“What do you mean?”

“Oh, my sweet summer child,” Lowen says in a pitying tone. “You have no idea, do you?”

“About what?” I turn to Indy, who’s leaning on a column with his arms folded. “Indy, what are they talking about?”

He smiles, glancing at Salem briefly before returning his gaze to me. “As a recent inductee myself, I’d say the guys are pointing out the obvious. You’re in love with Stewart.”

I pull my head back, ready to object to the idea, but no words come. No fight. No denial. My shoulders drop.

“Well, fuck. Is that what this is?”

“Sure sounds like it,” Ridley says, squeezing my shoulder. “For what it’s worth, you did good with him.”

Jerryn nods. “He’s sweet and smart and obviously smitten with you too.”

My heart rate picks up. “Do you think so?”

“Dude,” Bane says. “If he was a cartoon he’d have hearts for eyes.”

“But that’s not what we talked about. He’s been in one long-term relationship his entire adult life and thought he was straight. What if he wants to explore, you know? Or hell, just be single for a while?”

“What if he doesn’t?” Salem asks. “From where I was standing, he seemed just as content to be locked in your suite as you were.”

“Are you projecting what you think he wants instead of asking him?” Indy asks.

I scoff. “Using logic and maturity on me. Rude.”

The guys laugh, but Lowen adopts a more serious look.

“As much as I’m Team Stay Single, even I have to admit that watching you and Stewart together melted my heart. Just a corner of it though.”

“Wow, a whole corner, huh?” We’re all silent for a second. “How do I know for sure that it’s more than a passing crush? I wouldn’t know love if it punched me in the face.”

“Obviously.” Salem winks.

“It’s the feeling of wholeness when they’re with you,” Indy says. “It’s waking up and going to sleep with them on your mind and thinking about them every minute you’re apart. When you see them, your heart literally reacts. Sometimes your stomach flutters.”

“You basically feel like you’re having a heart attack,” Lowen deadpans. “It’s lovely.”

Salem laughs. “It really is weird. For me at least, it wasn’t like anything else I’d ever felt. It was way beyond a crush or a physical connection. I started thinking about…” He turns his gaze to Indy. “About the future and stuff. Indy was always in it.”

“Simple experiment,” Lowen says. “Try to imagine a few scenarios without Stewart in them.”

“Like?”

“Valentine’s Day,” Bane says.

“I mean, gag, but that’s a good one,” Salem says. Indy kisses his cheek.

“Or even better,” Jerryn says, “imagine Stewart on a date with someone else on Valentine’s Day.”

The thought of it immediately makes my blood boil. “No one is good enough for him.”

Lowen raises a perfectly groomed eyebrow. “Only you?”

“I understand him.”

“And isn’t that all any of us want?” Jerryn asks in a dreamy voice. “With friendship and love, we want to be seen. Understood.”

“I hear you guys, I do, but what the fuck do I know about being in a relationship?”

“What the fuck did I know until I met Salem?” Indy says. “There’s no handbook, dude. You just figure it out together.”

“Give him a little credit too,” Ridley says. “Maybe he thinks you’re the one who doesn’t want to be locked down. Talk to him.”

“I don’t want to pressure him. I don’t want him to regret me.”

“He’s not a kid,” Lowen says. “He’s a full-grown man capable of making decisions. He’s a professor, for fuck’s sake.”

“I agree with Low,” Indy says. “And just because you’re the first guy he hooked up with doesn’t mean you’re not the one. Doesn’t he deserve that instead of the endless dating merry-go-round? Not gonna lie, what I have now is way fucking better.”

Salem practically swoons before my eyes. “You just earned yourself an epic blow job, sir.”

“As if he doesn’t get one every day,” Ridley stage whispers.

“As if I don’t know how to kick it up a notch,” Salem adds.

Indy wraps his arms around Salem from behind. “Kit, buddy, don’t overthink it. If it feels good, go for it.”

I nod, glancing around the still-quiet bar. There are two tables with people eating, but otherwise the lunch crowd hasn’t blown in for the day yet.

“Do you guys mind if I run an errand?”

“Not at all,” Lowen says.

With that, I salute them and head to the back to grab my coat, and then I’m out the door and down the sidewalk towards the university. On my way, I swing into the wine shop that just opened a month ago and pick out a box of chocolates, knowing Stewart has a wicked sweet tooth, then I’m off again, determination guiding my steps. I’m not sure what I plan to say when I get there, but I need to see him.

It’s cold as balls and not every sidewalk is cleared yet, making my journey harder than it should be, but I don’t care. The reward is seeing my favorite professor at the end of it.

When I enter his building, I pause to collect myself. It’s eerily quiet since it’s still winter break. I wipe my boots on the runner then head up to his office, but as I approach I hear the softer murmur of two voices, one of them is definitely Stewart’s.

“No, he’s amazing, Theo, and I think that’s the problem.”

I lean with my back against the wall, my heart racing as I realize he’s talking about me.

“How is being amazing a problem?”

“It doesn’t seem real. How did I get the attention of a man like Kit? Makes no sense.”

“Now you’re just being ridiculous. What’s not to like about you?”

“It isn’t that.”

“Then what is it?”

I tense in anticipation of what he’s about to say. What if he can’t see a future with me? What if he wants to explore the dating scene? What if I’m just not enough?

“He’s not a relationship kind of guy. He’s made that so clear, even during this magical almost-week we spent together.”

Did I? Fuck.

“Things change, Stewart. From everything you’ve said, it sounds like he’s into you.”

Stewart blows out a shaky breath. “How do I find out without fucking it up?”

“Ask him?”

“No, Theo. That could fuck it up.”

My stomach flutters. I think we’re on the same page. This is good. Very good.

“Tough love time,” Theo says. “If he freaks out, then as much as it sucks, it’s better to know that and move the fuck on. You’re an amazing person and a good catch. If he doesn’t know that, then fuck that guy.”

“Easy for you to say. You’re young and confident and?—”

“Nuh-uh. Not gonna let you go there. You snagged a total baddie on your first try. Don’t give me that insecure mess.”

I hear Stewart chuckle and make a mental note to buy Theo a drink sometime.

“Just talk to him,” Theo continues. “Tell him.”

Tell me what? Could he be in love with me?

“Maybe,” Stewart says. “It hasn’t been that long.”

“Fine,” Theo says. “Wait until you’re not scared anymore, but to me, it sounds like Kit is into you, and I know about these things.”

I back away from the door, down the hallway, then make a louder entrance, scuffing my boots on the polished floor as I make my way to his office. When I get there, I step over the threshold, knocking softly on the doorframe.

Theo sits perched on the edge of Stewart’s desk, and when he sees me, his whole face lights up. I’m pretty sure he just mumbled, “Speak of the devil.”

“Kit.” Stewarts pops up from his chair. “What are you doing here?”

“I hope I’m not bothering you.”

“No. Not at all.”

“Is it weird that I missed you? I know you have a lot of work to do so I won’t stay long, but I wanted to see your face.” I offer the box. “Brought you some of those fancy chocolates from the wine shop to give you an energy boost for reading essays.”

“OMG, dreamy.” Theo slides off the desk. “I’ll give you two some privacy. Good to see you again, Kit.”

“You too, Theo.”

Theo pulls the door closed behind him, and I immediately surge forward and pull Stewart into my arms, burying my face in the crook of his neck. He’s wearing a cozy sweater and he still hasn’t shaved. He smells like laundry soap, shampoo, and… everything I didn’t know I needed. Until now.

Stewart sinks into me, wrapping his arms around my waist, and I swear I can feel his heartbeat through his chest. When I finally pull back, his cheeks are the sweetest pink.

“You missed me?” he asks.

“My bed is pretty cold without you in it.” I brush my fingers across his cheek. “I’m glad you kept the beard.”

“My ex hated it when I grew it out.”

“I’m not your ex.”

“That’s obvious.”

“Come to Moby’s for dinner tonight?”

He nods. “Yeah.”

“Can I be greedy, Professor?”

A smile tugs at his lips. “Sure.”

“Spend the night with me? Or I’ll come to yours. Whatever’s easier for you, but I want to wake up with you tomorrow.”

He blinks rapidly a few times before nodding. “I’d like that. Um, yours is good.”

I swipe my thumb over his chin as words I never thought I’d say bubble up. But not here. Not right now. I think the guys might be right, because standing here, gazing into the prettiest eyes I’ve ever seen, I can’t imagine cutting him loose. No fucking way.

“I’ll see you later, gorgeous.”

“Thank you for stopping by. And the chocolates. You made my day.”

Instead of words, I lean in and taste his lips again. Fuck, he’s so addictive as he whimpers and claws at my shoulders when I deepen the kiss. Our tongues tangle and my cock hardens, and it’s all I can do not to lay him out on his desk and fuck the cum out of him again.

I reach around him and squeeze his ass, swallowing down the gorgeous moan it earns me. Yeah, I’m not even kind of gonna let him go.

Breaking the kiss is incredibly hard. “If I don’t go now, I’m gonna break a bunch of school policies.”

Stewart laughs, tossing his head back, which gives me the chance to bite his neck. “You drive me wild, you know that?”

“It’s my job.”

Stewart tucks my hair behind my ear. “You’re nailing it. Or, as one of my students recently told me, you ate that.”

I chuckle. “I can think of something I’d like to eat later.”

He gasps softly, dragging his hands down my chest. “I think that can be arranged.”

“Yeah? You like it when I eat your ass?”

Stewart nods. “I like eating yours even more.”

“Mm. Tell me what else you like, beautiful.”

“I love it when you enter me and your thick cock stretches me to my limits. I can still feel you every time I move.”

“I’ll never get enough of that mouth of yours.”

“I hope not.”

The wistfulness in his tone makes my heart flutter with a hope that’s brand new to me.

“You’re amazing, do you know that, Stewart? You’re amazing, and I’m a lucky guy.”

His lips part, but he shakes his head, pausing before he speaks. “Thank you.”

“You’re welcome. I’ll see you at dinner, huh?”

“You’ll see me.”

After forcing myself away, I adjust my bulge, drawing an adorable chuckle from Stewart before I head out, bumping into Theo in the hallway.

“Hey,” he says.

“Hi.”

I can tell from his expression that he wants to say something, so I give him the opening.

“Yes?”

“He’ll kill me if he finds out I said anything, but I really hope you’re the guy he thinks you are. There are a lot of good actors out there, but I want to believe there’s no way you’re not legit.”

“I’m not acting. I’m…really into him. He’s special.”

Theo’s shoulders relax and he smiles. “He is. I’m glad you see it too.”

Then something dawns on me. “Wait. Do you have feelings for him?”

Theo pulls his head back. “Oh god. Jealousy? Super cute. But absolutely not. He’s a good friend, and he’s one of the first peers who took me seriously. I care about him and want the best for him. If that’s you, then hurray.”

I nod, smiling even though embarrassment quickly replaces the pang of jealousy I was feeling. “Sorry. I’ve never been like this over someone before.”

Theo smiles. “You’re forgiven. It’s adorable. I doubt Stewart has ever had someone fight for him or even be jealous over him, which is a shame, isn’t it?”

“Yeah.”

“So don’t fuck it up, huh?”

“I won’t. I…” Pausing, I shake my head. I’m not telling Theo things I haven’t told Stewart yet. “I care too.”

“Obviously.”

“Hey, if you’re ever in Moby’s, I’d like to buy you a drink. Anyone who cares about Stewart is good in my book.”

“You’re on.”

I walk back to the bar, filled with thoughts of commitment and the future, and for the first time in my life, what it feels like to have feelings for someone. It’s scary, no lie, but it’s also incredible.

Now all I have to do is figure out how to tell him.