Page 17 of Gin & Sin (Last Call #2)

SEVENTEEN

KIT

Waking up next to Stewart feels better than it should. I’m not the kind of guy who typically invites people to share my bed, but after falling asleep at his house, I can’t lie and say I don’t really dig this.

He’s so soft in the morning. His skin, hair, the even breaths with the occasional snuffle as he shifts and burrows deeper into my side. I card my fingers through his hair before kissing the top of his head, squirming as he playfully drags his teeth against my tender side.

“Morning,” he says, his voice still heavy with sleep. “It is morning, right?”

“Think so. Not sure what time it is since it’s still dark outside.”

“I figured you’d sleep in with your schedule.”

I nod, sliding back enough to see his face. His eyes are closed, like he can pretend he’s still asleep.

“Usually need a bladder break, then I sleep for a few more hours. There’s no rush to get up though. We have nowhere to be today.”

“I love winter break.” He peels his eyes open. “Even though I have a stack of papers and exams to grade, it’s nice to have the time to do it.”

“I bet.”

“Should we see if the forecast was right?”

“Sure.” I climb out of bed and cross the room to peek through the drapes. What I see makes my jaw drop. “Uh, Stewart?”

“Yeah? Something wrong?”

“Not wrong, just…”

He joins me, leaning against my arm as he peers outside. “Whoa.”

There’s nothing before us except a thick blanket of snow, not even the outlines of the shrubs or fence that line our backyard. The only things visible are the taller trees.

“How many feet do you think it is?” Stewart asks.

“A shit ton.” I turn to him, pulling him closer. “I think we’re gonna be here for a while. If I remember correctly, all the resources go to New Onyx first.”

He nods. “True. After the blizzard we had a few years ago, it took the town four days to be operational again.”

“Four days, huh?”

He smiles. “Yep, and it wasn’t nearly this much snow.”

“Whatever will we do to amuse ourselves for that long?”

“I can think of a few things.”

“Want to tell me some of them?”

He immediately blushes but his eyes heat at the same time. “I want to suck you until you come in my mouth.”

His directness startles me, but in a damn good way. My cock swells, jutting from my naked hips. “Mm-hmm. What else?”

“I want to eat your ass the way you ate mine.”

“Fuck, babe.” Sliding my hand down his hip, I train my eyes on his growing erection.

“Then I want you to fuck me until I can’t walk right. I want to feel it for days.”

“You’re so fucking sexy when you talk like that.” I reach down to barely stroke him, lightly dragging my fingers across his balls and shaft as he shudders. “Taking you apart is such a treat for me.”

Stewart grabs my hand, placing it flat on his belly. “I wish you could feel the flutters you cause. I want you to know what you do to me.”

“I know.” Gripping his wrist, I pull him closer again. “Can I tell you something I want?”

“Of course.”

My thoughts are a flurry of words and desires that feel both comfortable and foreign. Yeah, I want to fuck him senseless and draw a constant parade of moans from his pretty lips, but there’s something else that takes me aback more than a little.

“Kit?”

Do I say it? Can I? What if he thinks it’s weird or intrusive or clingy? I nearly choke on that thought. Me? Clingy? The fuck?

“Is something wrong?” Stewart asks, concern reflecting in his eyes.

“No. Not even a little.” Gazing into his eyes, I find that glimmer of curiosity and vulnerability that’s becoming a siren song for me. Fuck it. “I want to talk.”

A deep crease furrows his brow. “Talk? Is something… not the way you want it?”

“That came out wrong.” I rub my hands up and down his arms. “What I mean is I want to get to know you more.”

His expression goes blank for a second before morphing into pure confusion. Is this the part where I fuck everything up?

“You’re sure you really want to get to know me?”

I nod. “Yep. You’re interesting, and like I’ve said before, you’re different from the people I normally date. I like that about you.”

A sweet smile tugs at his lips, but he fights it. “What if you don’t like me as much?”

I remember his earlier comment about being told he’s boring. “What if I like you even more?”

Stewart shakes his head.

“You might not like me either.”

He finally lets his smile out. “I doubt that.”

“Want to find out?”

Stewart studies my face for a few seconds, then nods. “Something about you makes me feel braver than I usually am.”

“Maybe you have the same effect on me.”

He tilts his head and quirks one eyebrow. “I still can’t figure out if you’re just full of perfect things to say or if you’re a real person.”

His comment pokes at something hot and tight in my chest that I’ve pushed down for a long time.

“What did I say wrong?” Stewart asks.

“Nothing.” I force a smile. “We should get some coffee and go back to bed for a little while.”

“Sounds good.”

“Bathroom first.”

I grip his hand and lead him across the bedroom to the grand bathroom. Stewart stops in the doorway, glancing around.

“Whoa.”

“I know. Lowen’s a bathroom guy, so he went a little over the top in design. We all have our own suites. We don’t even have to go downstairs to get coffee unless we want to. I have a little kitchenette in the sitting room.”

“Your bathroom is bigger than some apartments in the city.”

Grinning, I nod, walking over to open a door. “Separate toilet rooms, or water closets as Lowen insists on calling them. He designed the bathroom to accommodate two people.”

“Considerate.”

“He is.”

Stewart slips into the toilet room while I walk over to the other one on the opposite side of the massive marble-and-wood vanity. After relieving myself, I stop at the sink to wash my hands, then twist around the linen closet that Lowen stocked with extras supplies. I pull out a towel for Stewart then focus on brushing my teeth.

He appears a few seconds later, joining me and using the toothbrush he brought with him to brush his teeth. We gaze at each other’s reflections in the mirror, both of us smiling like idiots. I like this. This gorgeous man in my space. I’m just as surprised as anyone would be.

“Want a quick shower or coffee first?” I ask after spitting out my water.

Stewart taps his chin. “Hmm. Is there a possibility of sex soon?”

“There’s always a possibility of sex.”

He grins. “Then we better get clean.”

“Good call. Then I can spend the day getting you dirty again.”

I cross the bathroom and use the panel on the wall to start the double shower.

“Seriously?” Stewart says, studying the various buttons.

“Lowen saw these showers in Japan and couldn’t wait for the opportunity to install them. I admit it’s fucking nice. I was never a guy who thought a lot about the shower process, but I look forward to it now. There’s massaging jets that hit from calves to neck and the rain shower head feels like pure luxury.”

“What a treat.”

He steps inside and I follow, watching how his face lights up as he steps under the stream.

“How’s the temp?”

“Perfect.”

Watching water flow over him, making his hair curlier, clinging to the hair on his body and his soft curves as it makes its way down to the floor is a visual treat I didn’t know I needed.

“Fuck, you’re hot.”

He snaps his eyes open, dragging his hand over his face to remove the water. “Are you serious?”

I nod, stepping closer and wrapping my arm around his waist, pulling him close enough that our cocks bump together. “I’m serious, Stewart. You do it for me.”

“Thanks.” He runs his hands over my pecs, squeezing gently. “I’m honestly not sure anyone has ever called me hot, but I believe you. At least I want to.”

“I want you to believe me too.”

I’m torn between kissing him, bending him over, and spilling my guts. Fucking weird. To give myself something to do besides obsessing over my thoughts, I grab the body wash and start rubbing soapy hands over Stewart’s skin. He opens his hands for me to pour some into them and rubs them over my chest.

“I can’t tell you how many times I fantasized about touching a man with hair on his chest,” he says. “It’s way better than I thought.”

“Yeah?”

“All of it is.” He nibbles his bottom lip. “It’s the difference between a mass-produced dessert from the frozen section and a handmade treat from an artisan baker. Both are good, but one is miles better.”

I gently lift his chin. “It’s kind of fun reliving all of this through you.”

“Is it the same for you? Men and women, I mean. Is that okay to ask?”

“It’s okay to ask.” I ponder his question for a second. No one’s ever asked. “Uh, no, not the same. At this point in my life I can honestly say I’m more viscerally attracted to men. I love masculinity in all its forms. When I was younger, I was pretty equal. There are many things to like about the female body, but these days, it’s more sporadic. A woman has to be unique to get my attention.”

“Unique in what sense?” he asks, swirling his fingers around my nipples. “Looks?”

“Nah. I have a broad type when it comes to looks. She has to have something in her personality that snags me. It can be a spark of humor or a glimmer in her eye while we wait in the coffee line. I love a snarky woman who has no issue taking me down a peg or two. I might pursue in those cases.”

“But men?”

“Like I said, it’s visceral. Primal. Like when I laid eyes on you, I knew immediately I wanted to taste your kiss.”

“Based on my…looks?”

“It was a vibe. Yes, your face is incredible, but it was the energy you gave off that lured me in.”

“Your definition sounds demisexual in one way, but your sex drive doesn’t fit.”

I chuckle. “I’m not demi. I’m a slut who loves bodies in all the forms they come in. But I’m a guy who, after forty years, the majority of those in the dating scene, needs more than just a pretty face to get off.”

Stewart nods, tickling my belly. “Do you identify as bisexual?”

“If I’m asked.”

I swear I can literally see his thoughts racing.

“Hey. Labels aren’t as important as they seem sometimes. If they make you feel good, then claim one, but you can just be you too.”

His expression softens. “I know. I teach this, but it just lands differently when it’s you.”

“I get it.”

“I know that even if I’m never with a woman again, that doesn’t change who I’ve always been, but sometimes I wonder if I repressed my sexuality so much I convinced myself I was straight or even bi. What if I’ve been gay all along?”

“What would change if that were true?”

“I would feel worse about what happened with my ex.”

“Did you have good moments in your marriage?”

“Yes, of course.”

“Do you regret those moments?”

“No.”

“Did you cheat on her to explore your desires?”

“No.”

“Then why would you feel worse?” I cup his face. “Lots of marriages fail for tons of reasons. It just happens.”

He exhales slowly. “You’re right. I’m overthinking it.”

“We all do at some point, but at the end of the day—and I know you know this—it doesn’t really matter. If you’re gay, bi, pan, whatever, all that matters is that you’re happy and true to yourself.”

“Careful, Kit. You may get a request to do a guest lecture in one of my classes.”

I grin, pulling him close. “Maybe we can work on that.”

As I nuzzle his neck and step us under the stream to wash away the soap, he melts into my embrace. The longer I hold him, the more my thoughts shift towards the one thing I’ve never wanted with anyone but the guys. I want him to know me.

“Hey.” I step back. “Want to get out?”

“Sure.”

“Good. We can get some coffee, and then I think I want…” I pause, letting my stomach finish the twisty knots and flips it’s doing while I flush with nervous heat.

Stewart tilts his head, gripping my arms.

“I want to tell you some things about me.”

His face lights up. “I’d like that.”